Noxema Shaving Cream:
“Take it off…take it ALL off” spoken by a sexy blonde while men shaved to the tune of “The Stripper.”
Choo-Choo Charlie! Loves his Good 'n Plenty!
Mama Mia, at’sa spicy meat-a-ball.
It’ll suproise ya, the Enegoisah! Oy!
Ah Jocko, sad byproduct of Americas brief post-Crocodile Dundee obsession with all things Austrailia . . .
My beer is Rheingold, the dry beer.
Ask for Rheingold whenever you buy beer
. . .
Long John Silver’s got a treat for your young buccaneer.
(something, something, something) and you cruise away with free souvenirs.
Ya get the best seafood dinners, fries, and home-made slaw. . .
Chicken too!
So bring your whole crew. It’s the fun thing to do.
. . .
Shopping, phone call, dog got away. . .
No time to cook for this busy day-ay. . .
Get a bucket of chicken
Finger lickin’ good
Have a barrel of fun
Good-bye ho-hums.
Get Kentucky Fried Chicken
Come on, every one
. . .
(I don’t remember all the lyrics for this one:)
Grab a broom and a brush.
Clean it up for the rush.
There is nothing so clean. . .
As my burger machine.
When we’re finished, what then?
Start all over again!
Tell me “What does it meeeeeean?”
At McDonald’s it’s clean
. . .
Make a ring,
And then another ring,
And then another ring,
And then you’ve got three rings: Ballantine!
. . .
We are the Freakies.
Yes, we’re the Freakies.
This is the Freakies tree.
We never miss a meal,
'Cause we got the cer-e-eal
. . .
I remember a cigarette commercial for Viceroy Longs in which a Maurice Cass-ish looking psychiatrist is giving his patient an ink blot test. The guy says stuff like:
“I see a man fishing off a pier, smoking Viceroy Longs.
I see a man reading a book, smoking Viceroy Longs.
I see a man cutting the grass, smoking Viceroy Longs.”
The psychiatrist is bewildered at why the guy keeps seeing the “figures” are all smoking Viceroy Longs. The guy offers his psychiatris on, and it ended with a nodding acknowledgement from the psych that maybe the guy was right.
[Local commercial hijack] Great commercial showed in Oregon in the early 1990s. A perplexed Frank Zappa looks straight at the camera and says something like “A bunch of people from PGE [Portland General Electric] came to me and asked me to do a commercial. I told them I don’t do commercials. They said,
‘That’s fine.’ I told them that would refuse to ask PGE customers to buy more electricity. They said ‘Great!’ In fact, I said, I’ll tell them to buy even less electricity. They said ‘Perfect!’” Then the announcer would come on with a closing line something like. “Frank Zappa wants you to buy less electricity. PGE thinks that’s a great idea.”
The concept of Zappa himself doing a commercial, even a sort of anti-commercial, was brilliant. It was an instant attention-grabber for boomers to see his face filling a TV screen. And to have him do sort of an inverted anti-commercial was intriguing for all ages, even older generations who had no idea who he was.
As for why PGE did that, one website says
[/local commercial hijack]
Now back to our regularly scheduled commercial
** Sometimes you feel like a nut…**
Remember the guys filming on the back of a truck saying “show me your Lark pack”. I expected to see raised blouses, but it was for a cigarette. But a great line none the less.
Smurfberry Crunch is fun to eat
A smurfy, fruity breakfast treat
Made by smurfs so happily
The taste of crunchy smurfberries…
I used to really like the “Trix” commercial where the guy goes to buy the “kids’” cereal, and the cashier is laughing at him.
The guy gets home and unzips his costume to reveal that he is actually the Trix rabbit. He finally got the ever-elusive Trix those little bastards would never let him steal from them.
He goes to 'fridge to get the milk, and…NO MILK!
It was actually one of those “GOT MILK” commercials.
That silly rabbit, Trix are for kids.
But what was the product?
(Tangent) The above slogan is kind of like the familiar movie tag: “Be afraid. Be very afraid.” Everybody knows it, but what movie is it for? The Fly with Jeff Goldblum
(And now back to our regularly scheduled commercials…)
(Slap!) Thanks. I needed that!
(which after shave was this? Aqua Velva?)
Here comes the king, here comes the beer number one…
C & H
Pure cane sugar
From Hawaii
La la la la
(okay I can’t remember the rest. But I remember the tune. It’s the same one that’s all over John Ford’s Donovan’s Reef.)
And whatever you do, DON’T SQUEEZE THE CHARMIN!
Long before the frogs drank beer, Rainier Beer, in Seattle, Has a commercial showing a sunset over a swamp with every animal sound, From crickets to loons, saying “beer”, or “Rainier”. It was a riot
Oops. Great minds think alike.
Dunkin Donuts: “Time to make the donuts!”
Palmolive: “You’re soaking in it!”
Does anyone else remember Waffle-O cereal? With Waffle-o Bill and his horse, whatshisface? Man, I used to love waffle-os.
Yup. I still recall using this line (while the commercials were still running) as the final kicker line in a Cub Scout skit we did that was a version of Sleeping Beauty with most of the lines of dialog stolen from well-known commmercials; Sleeping Beauty says it after the prince kisses her, of course.
I’m from Milwaukee, and I oughta know.
It’s Blatz, Blatz, Blatz beer, wherever you go.
Plop, plop, fizz, fizz
Oh, what a relief it is.
Alka-Seltzer!
“you ate it Ralph.”
“CUT!”
“Take Twent-seven!”
for our friends who grew up watching the Cleveland affiliates…
“Seeeee the U.S.A. in a C. Miller Cheverolet!” (blows kiss)
singing… “GARield-1, two-three, two-three, GARfield-1, two-three, two-three!”*
*In reference to the old-fashioned way to memorize phone numbers for our younger dopers.
It’s not how long you make it, it’s how you make it long! (Hint- NOT Viagra)
Mean Joe Greene and “the kid” for Coke…
…still makes me tear up (in a masculine “I love football” kind of way) everytime he tosses the kid the jersey.
The old Tootsie Roll commercial:
*The word looks mighty good to me,
'cause Tootsie Rolls are all I see.
Whatever it is I think I see,
becomes a Tootsie Roll to me!
Tootsie Roll, how I love your chocolatey chew!
Tootsie Roll, I think I’m in love with you!
Whatever it is I think I see,
becomes a Tootsie Roll to me!*
The old Atari commercial:
Have you played Atari today?