I’m not surprised that it was discreet. There are plenty of very small cameras that can be tucked away in a chapel or funeral home and wouldn’t require operators. All the rest of the equipment could be hidden away in a room and this would be just another “value added service” for the church or funeral home.
For the love of the gods, why? :eek: What reason did the Navy give for wanting too do this? A military funeral doesn’t exactly seem like good PR material for the Navy (especially since you sister didn’t die in the line of duty).
Please keep in mind that mortuary photos-pictures of the dead-were very common up until the latter half of the 20th century. Videos, on the other hand…
I asked my dad if he ever had anyone do this, but unfortunately, he can’t remember. Make a video, I mean.
That’s sort of unusual, but I see matt_mcl’s point. I’ll bet that’s one hell of a recording, by the way.
I hope you’re having ease hiding from you know who.
The reason given was so that sailors who could not attend the memorial service would have the option of seeing it. I believe the photos and DVD will also be provided to my parents. They did promise us it would not be used for PR purposes.
When my brother passed away this past August, they video taped certain things… like the procession and some memorials. In the days right after the funeral, they indeed were a comfort to have. Just knowing that so many people loved him and were feeling as equally lost now that he was gone helped some.
I’m so sorry about the loss of your grandfather. My condolences.
For what it’s worth, despite my mild support of the notion of a videographer for a grandparent-type funeral, I totally agree with you about the inappropriateness of recording your agony and pain for entertainment.
Funerals are a place to grieve, and also a place to celebrate the life that the deceased lived. If the funeral itself is more filled with grief, those grieving should be allowed their privacy. If the funeral is more filled with celebration and remembrance, it may be desirable to record those remembrances for the future.
There should be no problem with people who make either choice–although the families of public figures may find that they sacrifice some of their privacy as the world wishes to morn with them, and frankly, some of that world does watch the funeral for the entertainment value. (I’m thinking of things like President Reagan’s funeral–or really, his lying in state beforehand. But also things like Dale Earnhart’s (sp?) funeral. Or Princess Diana’s).
I can see where it might be a comfort to your grandmother in future to listen again to the eulogy, etc., because she’s probably not taking in a lot at this point in time. We just buried an aunt, and I know a lot of picture-taking was going on, because as others have said, our extended family doesn’t see each other very often, except (unfortunately) at occasions like this. So there’s a lot of “Oh, my gosh, how your kids have grown!” and taking pics to compare the height of all the cousins/grandkids/yadayada. So your grandmother may later watch this DVD and be surprised to see people there she didn’t remember being there.
We talked about photos at a funeral once I totally agree with you Elenfair I attended the funeral of my wife’s Dad. His best friend (The Dead Dad’s) showed up – with a camera - to take pictures of the family “for (the Widow)”.
I was totally & completely horrified, appalled and shocked. The wife’s family was totally numb and didn’t say a word – but this dork , maybe about 75, was clicking away almost constantly. These were shots like: the family getting into the Limo, the Piper, the Widow leaving the gravesite etc. NOT Dead Dad in his coffin.
I didn’t have the nerve to tell him to knock it off – the family was too numb to respond – he was the FRIEND – I was the daughter’s husband - if no one complained I didn’t see it as my place to create a scene or tell him to calm the hell down. I felt like a social coward the whole time though. It just wasn’t my tradition, in fact it was down right disturbing to me. Later I found it really didn’t register with the family at all -so I let myself off that hook. The Widow didn’t do much with the pictures - just threw them in a jumbled disorganized “picture drawer” that she kept.
To be fair, I’m very angry right now. I don’t know that anyone will ever just casually pop the DVD in to watch while making dinner, or while having a beer with friends, or whatever, but that’s my fear. And to my mind, that’s disrespectful. I’m more than a little paranoid because we weren’t in control of the production and distribution of the DVD, and I don’t know who will be given copies, or how/when other sailors will be allowed to view it.