I have a confession…I tapped my toes today while listening to the new Cher " Are You Strong Enough" song. I feel so cheezy.
That what does not kill me, postpones the inevitable.
When I was in the shower this morning, I lathered, rinsed, but did not repeat. I’m sure God will punish me by making all my hair fall out.
“Penises don’t belong in the mouth, girls and boys. You’ve got the wrong hole there. Just like you wouldn’t shove pizza up your nose.”
-From the Brother Jed flyer-
::stands up, looks around nervously, clears throat::
Uh… ahem. My name is Greg, and I… um… actually enjoy the taste of Cheez Whiz!
Oh, the shame!
::drops microphone, runs for exit::
A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
I am listening to Neil Diamond’s Greatest Hits RIGHT NOW, AS I TYPE!!!
Forgive me Cecil, for I have sinned. It has been 30 years since my last confession. The other day I broke down, gave in to temptation, and bought Christina Aguilera’s CD.
You know you are a vet nurse when: it’s 4 AM and you are out of creamer for your coffee, so you use kitten milk replacer instead.
::::risks wrath of ESPN God::::
Hello, I watch NASCAR. Even the qualifying coverage. And the Happy Hour coverage. And RPM Tonight. Sometimes even the Busch series. Cars going in a circle (OK OK an oval, a tri-oval, whatever).
::::hey, i don’t feel any better for having confessed–what gives???::::
inconceivable? i don’t think that word means what you think it does
Okay, okay. I’ll spill it. Yesterday evening I actually drank a light beer. My soul is damned. There can be no penance great enough to atone for that mortal sin.
<sheepishly looking around to see who might see her, purplebear slowly makes her way to the front of the room>
I, uh, I, uh, well, I like frosting, 'specially double dutch fudge, uh, right out of the can. On strawberries is my favorite way to eat it.
Don’t tell my kids, 'k.
<blushing furiously, she rushes from the room> :o
You are more than a human being, you are a human becoming.
Og Mandino
That’s my name, not a description. I am neither purple nor a bear. Okay, so I’m purple.<a true Wally original!>
::::rising again, shuffling to the microphone:::: I buy five pound bags of chocolate chips and barely a cup makes it into cookie batter. The rest are :::cough::::consumed by the handful or in pancakes.:::::::
walks up to the front I… I actually like the Backstreet Boys and I screamed as loud as any of the girls at the concert… I even went alone… runs from the shame
Life is an exotic and sonorous nightmare, in which reason does not always play a role… - Exerpted from V:tM
Dreams die hard and we hold them in our hands long after they have turned to dust. - Bowen in Dragonheart
Human beings can always be relied upon to assert, with vigor, their god-given right to be stupid. - Seize the Night by Dean Koontz
You know why people call something impossible? Because it hasn't happened yet. - Robin Williams in What Dreams May Comeahem. I’ll be 31 this year, and I still read fantasy novels. I even reread my favorites. I’m talking about the ones written for teens. I’m so ashamed.
I…ummm…ahem…
I’ve seen the Monkees in concert. Twice. And there’s a Teen Idols tour coming this summer, with Peter Noone, Micky Dolenz, and Bobby Sherman that I want to see. Really, really bad.
:::Cristi hangs head in shame, because in fact, she’s not old enough to remember when these guys were popular the first time around, but she really likes them anyway:::
Cristi, Slayer of Peeps
I made my husband join a bridge club. He jumps next Tuesday.
(title & sig courtesy of UncleBeer and WallyM7!)
There’s no shame in this. I would’ve done the same thing if a guy had been holding a gun to my head.
My confession: My favorite food of all is macaroni and cheese. I eat it for breakfast.
I hate other people’s little kids, when they bring them over to my house for a visit.
mmm…k? So fucking shoot me.
One of the few to be personally welcomed to this board by Ed Zotti.
Yours truly,
aha
I have both the Spice Girls albums.
Please don’t hate me.
The Scots - never trust a race whose national dress includes a concealed knife.
I ahem clearing throat actually read blushing romance novels
running for cover
The operation? Well, now I walk like a duck, but I won’t sue 'cause I’m getting a lot of laughs.
Sig courtesy of Wally the Great
You are all sinners and shall be punished 
I ate six mini cream puffs last nite sigh
Give your children these two things: One is roots, the other, wings - Wally Wally He’s our Man
I actually liked the movies “Xanadu”, “Hudson Hawk”, and “Istar”.
Eagles may soar free and proud, but weasels never get sucked into jet engines.
I still get depressed on Monday nights, ever since they took off Melrose Place. I miss them all - Amanda, Michael, Jane, Peter…
I’m, uh, watching the, uh, World’s Strongest Man competition. :o