The death of a friend

When I first joined the fraternity, one of the first guys I got to be friends with was Robinson. We had two classes together, and he lived at the frat house, so I’d go over there and kill time between classes. He was a really smart guy, he got a 34 on his ACT, brightflight, full ride into college. He was well read, extremely intelligent on many subjects, could talk Plato, Socrates, and Shakespeare, and could hold his own in any conversation, be it cars, audio, or politics. I wouldn’t hesitate to say he was a modern day genius.

Aaron slowly grew more and more distant, though, dropping one of the classes we had together, smoking weed more often, and hanging out with some of the other guys from the ‘fringes’ of the frat.

One day he quit his job suddenly. Instead of going on break, he just quit. We also had to kick him out of the frat house, because he hadn’t paid his dues in months, nor his rent. He moved in with some guys and dropped out of college altogether. He started smoking weed constantly, supplemented by a daily dose of X and maybe a hit of acid.

He began bumming rides across the country to make it to raves, and spending all his time either on pills, X, or acid, and selling weed to friends for cash. I saw him less and less, and he made less and less sense when we talked. The more drugs he did, the harder it was for him to discuss the things he used to be completely literate about. He just couldn’t remember anything he used to know.

He hopped a train yesterday to Chicago to live with some ravers he knows up there, to spend all his time dropping acid, smoking, doing pills, and raving on X, and selling to make ends meet.

I hope he has a good life, although I think it will be short. I suppose the life he had just didn’t have enough to offer him. Maybe there’s a point where one can be so smart that life unaltered just isn’t enough.

To all out there who are big on the drug culture: Please, use some self control. Don’t let it get out of hand.

–Tim

I think maybe the saddest thing about this is that he used to despise these types of person. He has become what he hated most.

–Tim

That is really sad.

{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}

That sucks… badly.

Maybe soon he will realize what its doing to him and change. Better to hit rock bottom sooner then later I guess.

I had some friends who were heading in that direction. Fortunately (depending on how you look at it) three of my friends are now in jail…one of them not identified by name in Time magazine in their “E” cover story as being the largest supplier of E on the East Coast. That woke up the ones that were left, and they’ve REALLY gotten a grip on it.

I’m VERY sorry to hear about your friend. One of the people who’s in jail, I had stopped talking to for over a year. We have started rebuilding our friendship, and he admits freely that he was a complete jerk to his OLD friends, from before he got caught up in the scene. I hope your friend comes to the same realization, but I hope it doesn’t take going to prison for him to reach it.

Oh Tim, hon… hugs

Similar story: Ray lived downstairs from me my freshman year. Our dorm was only 55 people total, so we all knew each other, and all hung out a little. I knew him as a friend, and he was sweet, funny, smart…a really cool guy. And then the drinking started. I saw the ambulance pull up twice during that year for him…once for diabetic shock, and once because he got drunk that he broke the front door to our building and then attacked his best friend Matt. Looking back, it wasn’t the drinking itself, it just made everything worse.

He joined Sigma Chi, and for a while he was better…I think getting THAT drunk scared him. We drifted away my sophmore year…I wasn’t part of that crowd anymore. And then one of my freshman year friends called me up. Ray had jumped off the Golden Gate Bridge. I got to sing at his memorial service.

hugs Tim again I now it can be hard to see someone you liked and cared about do this. I hope…I hope your story has a better ending, sweet. Email me if you want to talk…

Sometimes being sent to prison gives an addict a chance to re-evaluate life and try to come off their habit.

Many prisoners I deal with admit that they would be dead had they remained at liberty.
There are plenty with personality problems in varying degrees and drugs have not necessarily caused them but they seem to have found vulnerabilities and exacerbated them.Had they not taken drugs they might well have been able to function in society.

They talk in a very matter of fact way about friends they have lost to drugs, neither dressing the story up nor panning for sympathy, to them it is merely a fact of life.

There is a view that E is fairly harmless in a certain group in society but all I can say is that there is a significant fall-out rate.One young man who was released from our jail was dead in less than 3 months of a heart attack induced by Ecstasy.He was not even 25.

Cannabis is also said to be harmless, and maybe it is for most people, but how do you know that you are one of them?
Long term users seem to have difficulty communicating their ideas, to borrow an Irish phrase they are ‘away with the faeries’.Charmed into an unreality where there is a more pleasant world, they only seem to visit the real world to eat.

Some of them only seem to come out of it when they wake up one day and suddenly find they are 40 years old and they have literally lost up to 25 years of their lives to the drug existance, which consumes all their time.
Maybe your friend will make his way back to reality but he is going to be damaged by it.
Worst is that you have to cut such a person completely out of your life, there is just nothing you can do until the time comes, if it ever does.

I’ve seen this happen to many of my old friends (One of them is in Juvy until he’s 18, then in state prison until he’s 25), and I’m always afraid that I will lose more friends this way.

I’m so sorry to hear about your friend, Tim. There does seem to be some correlation between high intelligence and propensity to abuse drugs and alcohol. I’m a recovered alcoholic myself and so many of the people I meet in AA are very bright, talented people. I’ll say a prayer for your friend and hope that he finds his way back before it’s too late.

{{{Tim}}}

I’m so sorry, Tim. It hurts to lose a friend, especially when you know that you lost them to something so hurtful to themself.

((((((((Tim)))))))