The desert is beautiful, but...

All the damn plant have thorns!

I was fixing a leak in my irrigation system, and a scratched the crap out of my forehead on the stalk of a palm frond.

Those thorns are so sharp, they are like a knife, so I think it will heal fast (it didn’t rip the skin, more of a slice).

And then there are the infamous Grease-wood thorns, despite being not much bigger than a tooth pick, will puncture a two-ply radial tire.

I’ve learned the hard way to never buy anything but BF Goodrich TA’s.

All I can say is watch out for glochids.

I had giant prickly pears at my old house. They must have been 10’ tall.

Goat heads.

Here you go, the stuff of nightmares.

Stay away from cholla cactus (pronounced choy-ya). Those things will jump out at you; I had one attack me in the kneecap when I was in Arizona, and the resulting hole took over a year to heal. :eek:

Well…

They don’t actually jump.

But, their spines are barbed, and extremely sharp, and even the slightest brush will embed them in your skin, breaking off the entire pad and leaving it attached to you.

When I went out to take my “supermoon” shots early Monday I made sure to wear my boots and thick jeans, and watched where I walked - the Cholla were all over that hill:
Imgur
(You can see them beneath the three Saguaros)

As a former desert rat (recently retired to the Pacific NW), I add my vote for the “Jumping Cholla.” It is unbelievably easy to get one embedded in your person, and horribly difficult to extract the spines, especially in the field, without tearing the hell out of your hide. Once it’s happened to you, you will make very damn sure not to let it happen again. Ever.

I used to have a large cactus collection, but no opuntias, no never.

I witnessed two incidents at the “Cholla Garden” in Joshua Tree NP where people let their dogs out of the car to run free. Before I could speak up and tell them what a bad idea it was…well, you can imagine what happened. Not a good experience for dog or owner.

Having a really, really, REALLY bad day.

I’d like to see the story behind that photo. I’d be very surprised if that poor guy didn’t need a day or two in a hospital.

Sorry. I was in a hurry and didn’t have time to find a good link.

Golfer falls back into cactus during swing.

I don’t think those nitrile gloves the EMTs are wearing are going to be much good.

One trick you pick up here is to keep a bottle of white glue handy. When something has gotten those tiny little barbs that are highly irritating but difficult to see much less remove, spread a layer of glue on the affected area, let it dry, then peel it off.

Won’t work on cholla clumps, though.

Blame the goats. Here’s an innocent plant just trying to survive in a place where water is damned hard to come by, and then on top of that it has to fight off goddamn goats that’ll eat anything they can chew and swallow.

↑↑↑ My most hated, don’t even need desert to have way too much of these…

I figured it would involve the quote “Dammit, I can see the ball right there! I paid $4.50 for the damn thing and only hit it once, I’m not leaving here without it! I just need to reach a bit more…”

I was talking to a friend of mine, and he told me about the time he was at the Desert Botanical Garden, and there was a young boy who leaned in close to take a look at something and ended up with a Cholla pad stuck to his lip.

Ouch.

The kid went to reach for it, and my friend yelled at him to STOP! and then went over and used his Leatherman to carefully cut the spines away, and told him to find his parents and get to the nurse’s station…

How the heck did the local native americans cope with these death traps?