Okay, Dopers, it’s limerick time. Grab a handy (no, not handy – he’s gone ) Dopername or two, or three, or… and write a limerick!
Inspired by a Pit thread:
Lord Ashtar said, “Dems are sore losers!
The voting machines aren’t the choosers.”
Then Oy! and Zakalwe
Described how security
Can be bypassed – and some of them doozers!
Inspired by an IMHO thread:
Poor Ruby got dissed by Bridezilla
The consensus of answers was, tell her
“You had your chance. Nope!” SnakesCatLady (eloped)
Thought green hair would be Bridezilla-killer.
And just for this forum:
jsgoddess says, “NASCAR? Ptooey!” twickster asks of Sampiro, “How do ye?” harrylentil asks “Why
Must we all have to die?” ETF notes: “Poor penguins – kablooie!”
I was writing to EddyTedFred
Saying “Open a limericks thread!”
She wasted no time,
Showed great meter and rhyme,
But, sadly, I’m now going to bed.
But don’t let it get you too down.
Please, ETF, don’t wear that frown!
I promise I’ll write
At the end of the night,
'Til you’re just sick of having me 'round.
So I’ll leave you with just one more verse;
After all, can I make things much worse?
I suggested this theme,
But I need to go dream.
Don’t it figure? The world is perverse!
If **twickster ** asks “Hey, how *you * doin’?”
Of Sampiro, she’s headed for ruin.
She may flirt all day,
But Sampiro’s gay. :eek:
Though otherwise, she’d be a shoe-in!
Oh, ETF, dear friend of mine.
You know I like lim’ricks just fine.
But you’ve leisure to spare
'Cos you’ve posted elsewhere,
So why are these last four posts mine???
Our **monstro ** asked “do I sound mad?”
Prepared to admit “Oops! My bad!”
But Giraffe ** came past
With his head up his a
And now that thread’s tone is quite sad.
** Please supply a rhyme of your choice, given that this is in MPSIMS
Lately Cafe Society is a pain.
A damn topic again & again
And now with this thread
There’s a count down I dread.
To more threads re: Snakes on a Plane.
Hurray! **Annie-Xmas ** has posted
To this thread, which had earlier boasted
Just Eddy and me,
But it’s fun, can’t you see?
To celebrate, I may just get toasted!
There once was a lass from Sri Lanka,
Who said, “Welcome back, Master Wang-Ka!
I think you’re just great
C’mon, let’s procreate!”
Said he “Sorry – taken – but thank ya!”
Master Wang-Ka fingers are snapping
And I just just hear his toes tapping.
He’s not really boasting
But merely reposting: Christmas Spiders!. Now that’s really “raping.”
Some of the threads here are deep
As we talk of our problems and weep.
But they’re all just phlogiston
Compared to Hal Briston
Admitting he loved him those sheep!
Gosh! Just look at the names we can try:
Here’s RealityChuck flying high; Master Wang-Ka relates
More great tales, which elates
All his fans. Skald the Rhymer says “Bye.”
(Though I bet he’ll be back.) FairyChatMom
Does the MMP this week, to fathom
If the boat that she’d try
Is a good one to buy.
Zero thread posts concern O2BDumb.
That’s all for now. See ya later, you rhyming fools!
But, Oy! don’t you call him a wimp.
Our Scylla’s a man, not a gimp.
He’s brave, he stands tall
Nothing scares him at all –
Well, except for a nocturnal blimp.
I’m feeling rather stupid, and I’m going to go off line for now, so I’ll just throw in a couple that I came up with many years ago and still remember, and that unfortunately will not contain any SDMB user names.
When I sing Whitman’s Body Electric
Or I speak of the Greek Dialectic,
Hume, Milton, and Twain,
And of course Stephen Crane,
I show I’ve good taste, and eclectic.
They’re looking to teach my 4th grader
That ID first, Darwin’s stuff later.
But it makes me irate
For you can’t postulate
Creation without a Creator.
and my favorite (that I ever wrote - there are better ones out there):
Archimedes was really quite clever.
(He’s the fellow who thought up the lever.)
Because he did math
While immersed in the bath
We’ll remember “Eureka!” forever.
And my favorite, by that prolific author, Anon:
There was a young lady from Wight
Whose speed was much greater than light.
She went out one day
In a relative way
And returned on the previous night.
While her posts were always a hit,
Her name confused all of us a bit.
And so snakescatlady
Became SnakesCatLady.
A Lady with Snakes and a Cat. No shit!
Her defense of Joan Crawford is fearless.
Her posts on the subject are clearest.
The movie star defender is Eve.
And if you don’t believe
It, Just mention “Mommie Dearest.”
cmkeller is one of our Jews.
And he’ll help you with his Jewish views.
He knows to keep kosher
Offered shrimp, he says 'No, sir"
And the thought of pork gives him the blues.
Yes, cmkeller has plenty to say
Just don’t ask him on late Friday.
He follows the Torah
And reacts with horror
Post on the Sabbath? No Way! Oy vey
He moderates fast as a breeze,
Correcting all posts with his ease.
He’ll be here for life
And when he wed his wife,
It was a ** Cold(fire)** day in Hell(oise)
) Dopername or two, or three, or… and write a limerick!
