The Doper Name Limerick Game Rides Again

Calling all limerickers! Lovers of doggerel, fans of going from bad to verse!

The rules are simple. Write a limerick using another Doper’s name. You can use the previous poster’s or anyone else’s that strikes your fancy. You can abbreviate it if you must for the rhyme (as, for instance, ETF or EdTeddyFred instead of EddyTeddyFreddy) but it has to be recognizable.

Okay, let’s see whose names are around the top of the MPSIMS threadstarters’ list right now? Ahhhh…

Your Thanksgiving dramas? Please share
Says Cynical Gabe, while “Despair!”
csharpmajor bemoans
But hey! Throw no stones
At our Lissa – she really did care.

Idle Thoughts thinks of posting while smashed
While False_God is aghast at the past
Evil Ash checks out tits
Tuckerfan speaks of Skits
Johnny L.A.? “Buy NOW! Going fast!”

That feckless old Admin, Ed Zotti
(who seldom behaves like John Gotti)
Inverted all threads
From tails to heads
Because he was feeling quite naughty.

I think that CK DexterHaven,
That daring COCC maven,
Once wrote in a thread
That Cecil was dead!
It turns out that he was just ravin’.
Better quit before I get myself in serious trouble. . . .

Hey, what fun are the mods/admins if you can’t mock 'em, huh?
Giraffe prowls the plains of the Pit
Tracking down every troll, jerk and git
TVeb gets his back
With her sock-slicing knack
This Year’s Model is new, but he’ll fit.

Vanilla beans roast in the oven
While JayJay complains of a coven
Played by women of fame
In a film that was lame
In which Satan can’t get him no lovin

I was LOST in a thread by John Mace
Would I ever get out of this place?
I quote by default
Dopers yelling for Walt
While staring at Sun’s lovely face
ETF shouted til hoarse
About someone’s faux Pitting of course
She finds it much fun
To have bugs up her bum
While telling us tales of her horse

If there are more rhymes that you seek,
Look up my good buddy, meek,
For he started this thread,
And to everyone’s dread,
It went on for well over a week.

I hope with a hope sincere
That the poster known as Dragwyr
Pronounces their name
Exactly the same
As I’ve rendered it rhymefully here.

Sorry, it’s pretty lame. :o

You have hit the mark, Kythereia
My name’s not shrouded in mysteria.
You’ve not mispronounced.
Your post, I’ve not denouceed
So there’s no need to go into hysteria.

Dragwyr, your name brings to mind
Dragons soaring o’er cowering mankind
Roosting monstrous and stern
On the cragged heights of Pern
On the ridgelines of weyrs all aligned.

My dear,EddyTeddyFreddy,
This thread, I first thought it was petty.
But upon further thought,
All the rhymes here have wrought
A subject that make me quite heady.

marque elf started this thread
Which put lots of songs in my head.
The tunes they go on
And on and on and on
Will someone please shoot the thing dead?

Annie-X-mas, I feel your strife.
Perpetual tunes is no life.
But to gun a thread down?
Surely everyone would frown.
So go kill it by using a knife.

Your knife has no place in my store
Of weapons I use in this war
You say, “Shirly Ujest
A shiv is the best
Way to quietly dispatch the whore.”

Ogden Nash once said “Liquor is quicker”
But for legal insights, turn to Bricker
Or perhaps minty green
Then there’s Campion. 'Twould seem
'Tis the lawyers who’ll have the last snicker.

Ah HA! EddyTeddyFreddy,
Nefarious plans may be ready,
You will rule the land,
'tis what you have plan’d!
Sounds good. Can I be your steady?

With wit as sharp as a sword,
New Doper roshia has scored
A hit with her testing
Of the spirits – suggesting
Her fans never will be Ouija-bored.

Polycarp, he said in this thread,
when he posts, the thread ends up dead!
He misjudged his hosts,
Who keep posting posts.
So I guess it was all in his head!
PS - ETF, you are so evil for getting this stuck in my head.

Canadiangirl is flustered.
Her frying pan, it seems bustered.
Hey, wait! Do not fear!
The 'dopers are here!
And the answers come a-clustered!
twickster: Damn – I brought the wrong lunch
That pizza must have had quite a punch!
She’ll settle for “PB”
And tonight, you see,
That pizza will disappear. Crunch!

This is all your fault, Sternvogel. Now I can’t help thinking of thread-summery limericks as I read them …

What is this, Stranger On A Train?
This lunch query, you must explain!
Oh wait, never mind;
When read, you will find
He did Akbar. The answer was plain!

Let’s hear it for Amazon Floozy!
Her anagram pics sure are a doozy!
Big thanks to Hal Briston
with the webspace for listin’.
All this laughing, it has me quite woozy.

It would seem Ponder Stibbons has a curse.
For now he can only think in verse.
When he sees a new thread
Limericks form in his head.
Now he wants Sternvogel in a hearse.