I think, as a totally disinterested third party, that you’ve all been very unfair to 2trew. He’s obviously much smarter than any of you, and deserves your worship and adulat…
Oh crap, this is going out under my real nick, isn’t it?
How DO you make a sock puppet, anyway?
use a sock stupid
This is ludicrous. I did not lose my head in the Australian-American war to be treated like this. I have never been treated so shabbily in all my life, including the three years I spent in the Australian POW camp. I am leaving this message board forever, destroying my computer, and burning my house down. I hope that you all eventually acheive the maturity necessary to admit that I was right all along.
2trew: when you go stinky who wipes yer stinkin’ but?
Pravnik! I had no I dea you were/are a PATRIOT!
I got this bic lighter an I don’t smoke at all any more and a box of matches and a filet knife and some sparklers and a gas can. If I can be of any assistance please email me and I will rob a bank to help.
Anyone want to help me with create a help fund for our friend? We need it.
the stinkin shit
[ecstatic Sally Field]
You hate me! You really hate me!
[/ecstatic Sally Field]
At last! A sig line!
I dea
be not right, big finger, tinee keybgoard,Mighty tuna food taking over
p-]
Might as well. It’s not like anyone else would take the job.
Tunabreath, I think you’re finally old enough to know the truth about your mother’s tongue.
That is my puke he is heavy with. Projectile puke. Rich in tuna (the Mighty meat), carrots, Hershey bars, and otter scent.
Be careful stupid idiot. Wars have been fought, and lost over this weapon of mass destruction. The formula is guarded by my Palace guard. The ghost of Karloff will tolerate no trespass.
Dolfin are my smart weapons. Beware. I will only warn you once.
I Puke on you all! You are all square,
you are used toilet paper.
Serious note: this isn’t mine, so if there’s a copyright issue I’d appreciate it if the mods would delete it for me. I think it fits well with the tone of the thread, though.
Dear (insert your username here):
Reposted from a discussion board:
You swine. You vulgar little maggot. You worthless bag of filth. As we say in Texas, I’ll bet you couldn’t pour p!ss out of a boot with instructions on the heel. You are a canker. A sore that won’t go away. I would rather kiss a lawyer than be seen with you. You’re a putrescent mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a cad, a weasel. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, a revulsion, a big suck on a sour lemon. You are a bleating foal, a curdled staggering mutant dwarf smeared richly with the effluvia and offal accompanying your alleged birth into this world. An insensate, blinking calf, meaningful to nobody, abandoned by the puke-drooling, giggling beasts who sired you and then killed themselves in recognition of what they had done. I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformity. I barf at the very thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut. Lepers avoid you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed, a fungus, the dregs of this earth. And did I mention you smell? Try to edit your responses of unnecessary material before attempting to impress us with your insight. The evidence that you are a nincompoop will still be available to readers, but they will be able to access it more rapidly. You snail-skulled little rabbit. Would that a hawk pick you up, drive its beak into your brain, and upon finding it rancid set you loose to fly briefly before spattering the ocean rocks with the frothy pink shame of your ignoble blood. May you choke on the queasy, convulsing nausea of your own trite, foolish beliefs. You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid, nasty and profane. You are foul and disgusting. You’re a fool, an ignoramus. Monkeys look down on you. Even sheep won’t have sex with you. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in a land that reality forgot. And what meaning do you expect your delusionally self-important statements of unknowing, inexperienced opinion to have with us? What fantasy do you hold that you would believe that your tiny-fisted tantrums would have more weight than that of a leprous desert rat, spinning rabidly in a circle, waiting for the bite of the snake? You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a living emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a disease, you puerile, one-handed, slack-jawed, drooling, meatslapper. On a good day you’re a half-wit. You remind me of drool. You are deficient in all that lends character. You have the personality of wallpaper. You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted. You are the source of all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go. You smarmy lagerlout git. You bloody woofter sod. Bugger off, pillock. You grotty wanking oik artless base-court apple-john. You clouted boggish foot-licking twit. You dankish clack-dish plonker. You gormless crook-pated tosser. You churlish boil-brained clotpole ponce. You cockered bum-bailey poofter. You craven dewberry pisshead cockup pratting naff. You gob-kissing gleeking flap-mouthed coxcomb. You dread-bolted fobbing beef-witted clapper-clawed flirt-gill. You are a fiend and a coward, and you have bad breath. You are degenerate, noxious and depraved. I feel debased just for knowing you exist. I despise everything about you, and I wish you would go away. I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard stupid. Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid. Stupid, so stupid it goes way beyond the stupid we know into a whole different dimension of stupid. You are trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid collapsed on itself so far that even the neutrons have collapsed. Stupid gotten so dense that no intellect can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing hot mid-day sun on Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one second than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. Your writing has to be a troll. Nothing in our universe can really be this stupid. Perhaps this is some primordial fragment from the original big bang of stupid. Some pure essence of a stupid so uncontaminated by anything else as to be beyond the laws of physics that we know. I’m sorry. I can’t go on. This is an epiphany of stupid for me. After this, you may not hear from me again for a while. I don’t have enough strength left to deride your ignorant questions and half baked comments about unimportant trivia, or any of the rest of this drivel. Duh. The only thing worse than your logic is your manners. I have snipped away most of what you wrote, because, well… it didn’t really say anything. Your attempt at constructing a creative post was pitiful. I mean, really, stringing together a bunch of insults among a load of babbling was hardly effective… Maybe later in life, after you have learned to read, write, spell, and count, you will have more success. True, these are rudimentary skills that many of us “normal” people take for granted that everyone has an easy time of mastering. But we sometimes forget that there are “challenged” persons in this world who find these things more difficult. If I had known, that this was your case then I would have never read your post. It just wouldn’t have been “right”. Sort of like parking in a handicap space. I wish you the best of luck in the emotional, and social struggles that seem to be placing such a demand on you.
Can’t even come up with your own flames? What else of yours never comes up, I wonder???
My mother speak with forked tongue
2trew. May you rot on I-95! not in sight of anything interesting. So There.
Hey, JohnT, if you want to flirt just take out a personal ad or something, geez, have a little decorum.
Does anyone know how to spell the sound you make when you put your tongue between your lips and expell air (out your mouth) and make that sound?
It’s imbearising to be a southern rednek sometimes. please don’t hurt me to much with the ansur. I just have a kupple things to say is all.
FUCK YOU TOO!
Unhhhhh…what happened…
Where am I? Why are all those people yelling?
And why is that sailor trying to offer me five dollars?
places pencil in left nostril
“wibble”
Bippy, Jester, you two suck squirrel scrotums.
Why the hell do you feel the need to jump into this thread and post crap like that? Bet you feel real clever posting something that has nothing to do with the thread. Holy @^*% do I wish that I could be as clever as you two.
I feel so inadequate:(
Well, I thought Jester’s post had some merit, but I am so fucking sick and tired of Bippy and all the rest of those losers pushing their stupid “left nostril” agenda. It’s wrong, it’s been scientifically proven to be wrong in many peer reviewed journals (which of course I refuse to quote because the fact that it’s wrong is totally self evident), and I firmly believe that it’s time these left nostrilled losers were all disenfranchised and beaten severely with kitchen utensils.
YMMV, but if it does you’re stupid.
2trew, have you even given a single thought to those poor souls who stick kitchen utensils up their nostrils?
You really are a heartless jerk/
Well, excuse me Mr. “I have a heart”. Not everybody is so lucky as to have avoided the Aztecs, you know. Making fun of a genuine medical condition is just an indication of the depths of your depravity. Next you’ll be making fun of the scars that obsidian knife left. Hey, pal, I did my part to make sure the sun would rise again, so FUCK YOU!
I’m not prejudiced. What people do with kitchen utensils in the privacy of their own homes is no business of mine, as long as they only stick them up the right nostril.
About the jerk thing, well, I kind of see your point there.