The French must tell jokes about Americans--let's hear them!

Some months ago (primarily because the French government opposed America’s invasion of Iraq), many Americans were telling jokes about the French, many of them quite rude and tasteless. Of course, Americans were telling jokes about the French long before this.

But of course, it works both ways. We make fun of the French for not bathing as often as we do, and the French call us the “balloon people” because so many Americans are overweight. The French must certainly have been telling American jokes at about the same time that Bush started beating the war drums, and obviously they must have been telling such jokes long before the recent unpleasantness between our two governments.

I’d like to hear those jokes. As I expect some of these jokes will be quite harsh, I’m posting this in the Pit.

I don’t speak French beyond a few words and phrases that have managed to make it across the Atlantic, and of course humor is a delicate thing. Unless you understand the cultural context of joke, the humor can be completely lost on you, and even when cultural context isn’t important the humor can be lost in the translation from one language to another.

Even so, I’d still like to hear some of those jokes. There might be some laughs there, and I can always use a laugh.

And if you’re not French, don’t hold back. I’d like to hear American jokes from the British, Canadians, Australians, Germans, Italians, Russians, Poles, Spaniards, Egyptians, Iraqis, Syrians, Israelis, Turks, Indians, Pakistanis, Chinese, Mexicans, Brazilians, and anyone else who wants to get in a jibe or two.

So come on! We can take it! Let’s hear it!

Using the Pit to fish for jokes? Not a good idea.

I’m Canadian and honestly, I don’t think I’ve ever heard an American joke in my 30 years, other than stuff about particular Americans such as George Bush. I guess we realise than any joke about Americans would pretty much apply to us as well.

Guess you hadn’t noticed that people who start joke pit threads get suspended for a week, huh?

Here, i’ll move this to MPSIMS for you. oh wait, nm

For all that we supposedly hate Americans, we don’t have too many jokes about them. Mostly, Canadians tell jokes about people from other parts of Canada. (Sample: “Did you hear there’s going to be an Alberta version of Survivor? You have to drive all the way across it in a Volkswagen Bug with a bumpersticker that says, ‘I’m a gay Québécois New Democrat and I’m coming for your guns.’” No, I did not make this one up.)

“Hey, Joe! You American?”
“No, I’m a Canadian. It’s like an American, but without a gun.”
-The Kids in the Hall

Strangely enough, Canadians have tremendous gun ownership.

Don’t tell me; tell Dave Foley.

There aren’t any jokes because the French aren’t funny.

So this guys walking along the beach in France and he looks out and sees a body floating in the water. He wades out and drags in the recent corpse of an attractive young woman, nude. He drops her about six feet from the shoreline and runs to inform that authorities. He makes the phone call, and walks back where he found the body, and to his horror sees another Frenchman wildly making love to the recent corpse. He runs toward him screaming “Monsieur! Monsieur! You are making ze terrible mistake! You are making love to zee dead woman!”

“Mon Dieu! I thought she was American!”

I guess he’ll notice NOW. http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=127729

Lynn
For the Straight Dope