The funny injuries thread.

In My Humble Opinion
1

I suspect there has been one or more of these here but my searching couldn’t find them.

So, I’ve been walking to work for the last few weeks to try and improve my fitness/lose weight and yesterday I rode my bike to and from for the first time.

I got a good workout etc and everything seemed fine until about 11:30 last night when, just as I was getting to sleep, I had a terrible cramp in my right thigh. I don’t claim to have a high pain threshold but this was freaking agony and just didn’t seem to want to stop, everytime it settled down and I moved my leg it triggered an new cramp.

Anyway after a few minutes of this, bent double with pain and clutching my thigh I hobbled out to the kitchen to get some water (I was was actually feeling sick from the pain).

The problem for me was that in that position and under that kind of duress other…functions… got less priority, every step I took resulted in small, but audible, fart being released.

So I puttered down the hall sounding like a 2-stroke engine while my wife slowly collapsed in into hysterics :smiley: and this morning I got a lot of laughs making submarine jokes - “Emergeny surface! Blow all tanks!” etc.

I can’t be the only one this sort of thing has happened to?

2

Best I’ve got is my friend who had a motorcycle accident. The paramedics came and started cutting his clothes off, right there by the side of the road. So he quoted the line from Blazing Saddles, “Well, that’s the end of that suit.”

Oh, and, speaking of Mel Brooks, yes, I actually know someone who had a broken middle finger, which was splinted in the same way Zero Mostel’s was in The Producers. A permanent “flipping the bird” gesture until the spint came off.