If I had to bet, I would think that siblings have gift openings at their respective houses, then another opening at their parents’ house with all the sibs and nephews and nieces there.
I’d certainly be willing to chip in. Then she can buy herself something nice, open it in front of her family, and tell them a bunch of friends from an Internet message board bought it for her. Might give them some perspective. Maybe she has a paypal account?
Can you pay into Paypal if you don’t have Paypal yourself?
Even if you have kids, it can get on your nerves. My sister and eye have a eye-rolling extravaganza when my Mum gets on to the subject.
Thanks everyone for the kind words. I really appreciate it. And I really feel blessed to have you guys even suggest collecting money for me, but I really can’t accept it. I didn’t make this thread in order to garner sympathy in hopes of receiving something, I just wanted to hear what people thought. Again, I am really really touched. I’m leaving right now but I’ll post a better, longer reply to some of the questions when I get to work in a few hours.
I don’t believe so. It’s free to sign up but it does charge the receiver some on the money that is sent.
That’s one of the reasons we’d like to do something for you.
Exactly. I haven’t posted to the thread, but Aunt Flow, I remember how much it sucked being the single one in a family where everyone else was hooked up and when some had kids. I also know how much it sucks to be in a new place and not know anyone.
Regardless of whether or not you have anything to open on Christmas morning, you’ve got a whole host of Dopers thinking of you and who would like to do something for you.
E.
I’m in!
And Rilch, I may be mistaken, but I don’t think you can use PayPal to pay if you don’t have an account.
I have a friend from my childhood who actually does have kids now, but was still resentful when her first child’s first Christmas rolled around and New Grandma (who has a little bit of $$$, so my friend had accustomed to getting pretty expensive Christmas gifts from Mama) gave the new grandbaby lots of expensive gifts, but only gave my friend a pair of gloves.
She’s over it now, of course, but my point is that if it’s hard to make the “All About The Kids” adjustment when you HAVE kids, I’d imagine that it’s 100 x harder when you don’t have any, and 1000x harder when you know you won’t be getting anything from anyone else, either.
I feel very lucky to have a mother who tries really hard to keep things as “equal” as possible between my sister (who has kids) and (childless) me. Really, it makes me (and Skip) feel a little guilty, because my sister also happens to have very little money, and so is the one with the greater need.
This Christmas, Skip and I and my mom ended up chipping in to give my sister the $1100 she needed to get her gas (which was cut off last summer) turned back on, because she had no heat.
In Michigan.
With kids.
(She was using space heaters, but HELLO! Can you say “Fire Hazard”?)
We still bought presents for her kids, of course, because it’s not their fault we had to give their mama that money.
My mom ended up contributing the lion’s share of the Heat Fund and, because of some other little events that transpired, ended up basically spending $1500 total on my sister and her family over the course of that same week.
And that made her feel bad about not having spent nearly as much on Christmas for me and Skip (which was FINE with us - she got us what we really wanted, which was this, so we were happy as clams, and besides, she’s 76 and on a fixed income). So then she felt like she needed to get us additional gifts to try to make up for it. :o
I can’t imagine her ever pulling something like in the OP, even if she gave us each a coffee mug from the Dollar Store.
Exactly. Aunt Flow, sometimes you have to let other people do things for you, too - it would make us feel good.
I can’t believe someone worried about buying food for the next month is being told she’s selfish and should take happiness in the pleasure of children for wishing she’s get something…like, $20 for food…to eat. And is then given $50 to spend on more presents for children…who are getting more presents, from other people.
The mind just boggles. I may get shafted once in a while till I step up to the plate of howwy matwimony, but my parents don’t even treat pets that way.
I know you have pretty much stepped aside from the argument DianaG, but I can understand where you are coming from with this. If you are going to treat all of your kids the same for whatever reason that is fine and dandy, not to mention a valid budget choice. But as a childless adult I can tell you in family situations you do get the shaft on occasion. My cousins, my brother, everyone except me are all paired off into relationships for the holidays. I will get gifts from friends and family of course, but when I sit around the tree with family this holiday I get to see couples and nothing else. I will be the ONLY single person there. That hurts. It is a reminder that you haven’t found someone yet, and if that were going to be topped off with “and we won’t be giving you anything at all this year because it is more important to the kids” I would probably cry. To know that I don’t have a SO and I have to be happy and jolly around everyone else in coupledom is one thing, but to know that all of those people who will all get gifts from someplace else and go home with someone they love couldn’t see that I am in a bit of an emotionally vulnerable place would break me. Now my family is big on the gifts so I will not leave empty handed by any means, but I can see where Aunt Flow would feel bad about the situation, most especially since she is in financial need at this time. To watch everyone else and their happy families opening their gifts while you sit alone with nothing would be a terrible fate I wouldn’t wish on anyone.
- How it looks like it’s going to work this year, is my parents are going to go to my brothers’ places to watch the grandkids open gifts. I can either come with them or sit at their place and wait for everyone to come over for Christmas dinner. And given traffic I’m probably going to be going over sometime Sunday and spending the night.
- No, no resentment. I know they love me but I think they’ve ‘given up’ on me ever giving them anymore grandkids. And since my brothers are both ‘fixed’ to keep any accidents from happening, I guess I was their last hope
Why they’d want more grandkids though is beyond me. - Well today I was talking to my dad on the phone about something and I just jokingly mentioned “So did you get Bro#1 that Wii he wanted?” He chuckled and said no, since they weren’t getting anything for us this year. Nice to know for sure so I won’t have false hope :\
And to the people offering to help, I really don’t know what to say. I feel bad accepting anything but I feel bad turning you away. 
Maybe just a nice card? I’d really appreciate even something like that. My gramma sent me a card today and that really made me feel a lot better.
Please. I would love to send you a card, and I can afford that! Send me your address. Again - elenia25@gmail.com.
Please pop me an email when you get a chance. My husband sends out audio Christmas cards, and I’d like to send you one.
Maybe you could give some your address and we can pass it around. 
Email’s in my profile!
Yeah, please, email me (I usually don’t do this, btw). I am horribly woefully bad about sending things out so all my friends know my presents trickle in AFTER Christmas (sorry, raised heathen) but I want to send you something to cheer you up. Hope you like hindi music!
Aunt Flow, can you drop me an email, too? It’s in my profile:).
Please e-mail me too. I’d like to send you at least a card or a little something, though at this point you won’t get it until after Christmas.