The Great Obfusciatrist will tell your future!

I have a game that I play using Dewey Decimal Numbers that I’ve explained in the Dewey Decimal Antics thread. I just heard an interview on the radio with a guy that uses episodes of “Friends” to tell people’s future. He has the person ask a question and then plays a random “Friends” quote and then explains what it means. According to this guy, Joey is the most accurate and Ross is the least accurate. But that is neither here nor there. This guy makes MONEY doing this.

So, I thought, I can do better than that. I have decided that Dewey Decimal numbers are a much better metric to use, and I am going to use you guys to perfect my method and then hit the road to riches.

So! If you submit to me in this thread two or three important numbers from your life (each at least three digits and no more than ten) I will use their Dewey Decimal equivelants to provide you with important insights into your life and future.

And if you respond quickly, the first ten reponses will receive (absolutely free) a limited edition “Melvil Dewey - Prophet” button!

Twixt 3 and ten digits? No sweat.

699

1212

17702

7380

okay…
369
914
1218
92499
this I can’t wait to see…

111299

412

420

How about…

8799

62073

6591

Mr. Cynical, I have some VERY good news for you.

Your first number takes us into interesting territory, let’s consider the hierarchy of 699:


600 Technology (Applied Arts)
  690 Buildings
    699 Not Assigned

To the unitiated this may look like an early failure for my system, but I’m too clever for that. I find myself wondering what part of a building is “not assigned.” The obvious answer (particularly in early sitcoms) is THE BATHROOM. This idea is further strengthened by your fourth number, 7380, which simply translates to 738, let’s consider that number:


700 The Arts
  730 Plastic Arts and Sculpture
    738 Ceramic Arts

So we have ceramic arts in the bathroom which narrows things down to the toilet, the sink, or the bathtub. I think your third number provides the vital clue:


100 Philosophy and Related Disciplines
  170 Ethics
    177 Ethics of Social Relations
      177.02 Guides and pamphlets

So, “social relations” are involved. In that case I believe the signs are clear that in the near future you will be experiencing “social relations” in a ceramic bathtub. But more importantly, you are going to be facing an ethical conundrum. Perhaps you will be wondering if you and your partner should face towards or away from the shower head.

The final number, only confirms that this is indeed a good thing:


100 Philosophy and Related Disciplines
  120 Knowledge, Cause, Purpose, Man
    121 Epistemology
      121.2 The nature of the mind

I don’t think this requires any explanation.

In the near future, Mr. Cynical, you will find wondering which way to face while exeriencing “social relations” in a ceramic bathtub and the only thought going through your head will be "can I possibly think of anything better than this?"

Welcome kelliebob. Your first post, I’m honored. Have a seat an lets see what I can get from your selections.

Hmmmmm, first of all you have a high geography quotient in your numbers. This is a very strong indicator, let’s consider two of those numbers.


900 General History & Geography
  910 General Geography & Travel
    914 Europe

900 General History & Geography
  920 General Biography
    924 Europe
      924.99 Other Parts of Europe

Both of these point towards Europe. And the biography line is an indicator of where in Europe. Providing the specific location through the Biography (920s) section indicates that you will be moving your entire life to that location.

Now, “other parts of Europe may seem vague”, but you have to consider which parts are already excluded. The exluded parts of Europe are:

British Isles, Germany, France & Monaco, Italy, Iberian Peninsula, Eastern Europe, and Scandinavia. That doesn’t leave much and your third number provides the vital clue.


100 Philosophy and Related Disciplines
  120 Knowledge, Cause, Purpose, Man
    121 Epistemology
      121.8 Values

You are going to find yourself reconsidering your values, a pursuit that is going to lead you to move somewhere in Europe. Where? The answer, obviouly, is Vatican City. But your numbers tell me that you aren’t simply going to move there. Consider:


300 Social Services
  360 Social Pathology & Services
    369 Miscellaneous Associations

So, providing the final link, we learn that you will soon find yourself reconsidering your values (is paintball really that much fun?). This doubt is going to lead you to move to Vatican City and begin to doing good works for Catholic Charities.

Have fun, and give the Pope a hug for me.

306384821
201280

That is too amazing! You’ve now provided me with the impetus to follow my life-long dream. Thanks to your genius, I’m going to become the first agnostic pope with a uterus. Obfus, I am forever in awe of your abilities and I will make you the first Dewey Decimal Saint. :wink:

I’ll play…

120477
554465
71299
769021

061890
110455
080966
061300

OK.

0315196304

Hey, I am always up for nifty numeral action.

2144
410169
271
6799

891
12129
10204

Here’s mine:

11474

81097

10273

3175

4108

3105

331

349

791

You may begin. Dazzle me.

–Baloo

I wanna play too :slight_smile:

2740
121
6104737150
317
122274

102273
52701
2492
60647

O great and wonderful One,
May you see in your infinite wisdom to assign me a future based upon the following numbers…

32489
1979
333

your meek servant,
JL

h_thur, please have a seat and put your feet up. Young children can be so tiring. In fact, looking at your numbers I see that your final number relates directly to your son.


400 Languages
  420 English and Old English

This is an obvious reference to the efforts you will be making in the near future to ensure that your son grows up speaking English - as opposed to speaking Old English.

Your other two numbers indicate great intellectual efforts in your future.

Consider your first number:


100 Philosophy and Related Disciplines
  110 Metaphysics
    111 Ontology
      111.2 Universals
        111.2'99 Aeta, Andamanese, Semang; Papuans;
                 Australian Aborigines; Malays; and other
                 miscellaneous peoples

It would appear that at some point in the future you will be wondering if all of those people actually exist. And if they do, are the Miscellaneans universally upset by the stupid name.

Your second number indicates the further refinement of your studies into the above.


400 Language
  410 Linguistics
    412 Etymology

It is obvious that you will be spending hours pondering the etymology of “Papuans,” because it is just so fun to say.

Papuans, Papuans, Papuans. It just rolls off the tongue.

I’m sorry, h_thur, that your near future isn’t more exciting, but you are raising a 6-month old. Only 17.5 years to go until you get to have fun again.