The happy fun yummy yucky thread

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

First off I just want to say that I’m a native of NYC I lived about 2/3’rds of my life there and the horror and the sadness I prefer to share with my friends of the real world. But this thread is not about that.

There was a show that I watched as a little kid before I turned into a big kid early 70’s, I forget the name of the show (yes there is a reward for the name). The show had 2 chicks on it who would sit on rope swings, one of them had long brown ponytails and a guitar, the other one sang songs with her. There were also large sunflowers who would get bigger and smaller when they would come by, then there was the joke patch where the chicks would pick jokes off of daisys that were shaking. At some point in the show they would go visit sherman the big pink squirrel (sp?). No I was not on any drugs as a kid the strongest thing I did was lots of pixie sticks.

That is what the MPSIMS reminds me of, When I first started reading this board I felt like a kid on the first day of school, not high school but 1st grade, looking out at the school yard during recess. There were kids playing in one corner with a little teahouse “Lets play house today” “Today this is a pirateship” etc. then there were kids in areas sharing dirty little secrets or naughty jokes. Other kids were giving out “wet willies” running away shreaking and laughing then turning around for more.

:frowning:

I don’t think the time is right for that yet. This thread is for people who just want to share something funny or yucky etc that happend in the last few sad days. But there are rules, Yes rules damm it this is my thread if I want rules I can make them up.

rule 1: No talking of the horror of the last few days.
rule 2: no Poofters!
rule 3: see rule #1

The reward for the shows name is a naughty joke whispered in one ear a “wet willie” in the other and then I’ll chase you with a rubber snake…ok that is only for the girls. For the guys I’ll shake your hand, pat you on the back, and buy you a beer. And if you swing the other way, you can pick one from each.

I’m gonna post this then jump back and post what happened this morning, then off to work. For all I know this thread will sink like a brick. After work when I’ll be able to see how this is doing I’ll stop by the Pit wearing my abestos underoos just in case.

Off in the distance if you listen carefully you can hear the laughter and shreaks of thousands of kids. For some people it is very far away, some it’s closer. But each moment it’s getting closer, go into the playground when you can.

2

Woke up this morning, fed the cats then i went upstairs to do business. Set up my sights aimed at the toilet and let loose. Well there must of been something on the tip, covering the hole in one way or another and two streams of urine goes to both side of the toilet. I don’t know if this happens to any other guys but what a way to start the morning. <sigh>

3

Yes, it happens to other guys. I’ve said before that the penis is like a Windex bottle. The two settings are “Stream” and “Spray”.

4

You want yucky? I’ll give you yucky…

My idiot dalmatian escaped from the back yard again yesterday. At least part of her escape was spent in the muck and mud of the woods beyond our yard. My daughter managed to catch her (no small task, since she managed to lose her collar along the way) and bring her home.

I’ve never seen so much gunk on one beastie. I got at her with the garden hose, and was amazed at the amount of black mud washing off her. Then I took a towel to her and got even more gunk. She needs a bath, but I wasn’t able to bathe her last night. Looks like my weekend is planned for me.

She won’t be escaping any time soon tho - we put on her harness and chained her - she can get into the basement to escape weather, into the grass for relief, and to her water. She’s lucky I didn’t superglue her legs together.

Anyone want a wayward dalmatian?!?

As for funny - coworker just related the tale of a tree frog that jumped from his back door to the middle of his forehead. Then he peed - the frog, I mean - not my coworker. A true Johnny Carson moment.

5

Thow show was the magic garden. What do I win?

http://www.yesterdayland.com/popopedia/shows/saturday/sa1627.php

6

Oh good! I was actually thinking about starting a “Good Vibe” thread this morning.

Lessee…over the last couple of days, my kindergarten son has gotten over his initial jitters with the school bus to the point where he now hides because he doesn’t want to get off. After four long months I finally have grass growing in the patch on our front lawn where we moved our garden. And, as a result of tendinitis, I’ve cancelled my fall marathon plans. This is good because as a result, I no longer have to watch what I eat. To celebrate I went out to buy cookies last night and, what joy!..Keeble Fudge Shops were on sale, buy one get one free. I bought the full six limit.

7

I gave my son a haircut last Sunday and I kinda messed it up. I was using the electric hair cutter thingy I have and I was trimming up the back and my son turned his head and made me cut crooked. It looked awful so I ended up making it straight again but it’s about 1/2 an inch above where it’s supposed to be. sigh I guess it will grow back but for now it just looks plain silly! When he has his baseball hat on the bottom of the hat is even with his hairline! Good thing he’s only 2 and doesn’t understand that Mommy goofed. That’s the last haircut I’ll every give him. His Grandpa said we should just shave it all off. :eek: I don’t think so!

8

Hmm. Yucky? I think this qualifies.
I spent the past couple of days with my best friend, who is going through a nasty divorce. (And right after I got her house liveable, dangit!) So, every morning I would come home, feed the beasties, and shuffle on to work.
Yesterday, I came home to kitty litter. Everywhere. And, (this is the kicker) kitty poo stuck on the wall. 4 feet away from the litter box.
I clean up said mess, and traverse on to work.
Walking from my house to work is exciting in itself. I live in what is considered the ghetto, but there is a good mix of people who live there. Along the walk, a car slows down. Highly undesireable man, slighty greasy, leans out of his window. “Baby, shake it! I’d like to get on top of you!” only seconds before he hits another car. Karma for your carma, I guess.
Upon walking home last night, a man almost hits me as I walk LEGALLY through the crosswalk. He leans out the window, blows me a big kiss. I flip him the bird, and walk into the corner grocery store.

The good news? The thing that makes me happy? I went to take a short nap last night. Went to lay down around 6:30. (Fell asleep during Judge Judy, no less.) Woke up around 8:30 this morning, feeling better than I had in a long time. I made it to work on time (for once) and even still, I had time to have coffee and a cigarette before clocking in! It’s cool outside today, and the weather is beautiful. It’s going to be a better day.

9

yesterday at lunch, I had a burger with cheese.

and do you know what?

It was good!

:slight_smile:

10

Briminator, you’re a hasher! 'fess up!

I can attest to the “stream/spray” problem, btw.

I haven’t any really yucky to tell - I did, however, relearn something while running the other night:

A puddle of muddy water in rain looks exactly the same whether it’s half an inch or half a goddam foot deep.

I guess I knew that in the theoretical sense, but being a good skeptic, I had to perform the experiment. Imagine a soundtrack going “splish-splish-splish-splish-SPLATSCHglurfschlurp”, followed by long, creative, slightly short of breath trilingual invective. Needless to say I still had 3 miles to run. In the rain. Considering the advantages of indoors treadmills every splutchy, miserable step.

S. Norman

11

Even more deceptive when driving… and that deception is costing us more than $300… One would think a 45 y/o man would know better than to drive down a flooded street at night in a torrential downpour. One would think…

12

It’s happy, fun, AND yucky!
My eight month old daughter has a slight cold, with a runny nose. She’s crawls over to me and pulls herself up on my legs and so I lift her up into my arms. I zerbert her chin, which leads to peals of laughter. I then hold her over my head, since she loves flying. Her smiles are interrupted by a 6’5" 300 lb man sneeze coming from her 8 month old body, which sends a sick conglomeration of baby drool/snot/boogers all over my face, with a large chunk of it landing in my mouth.

At least it cleared out her nose a bit.