Lucky for me a large majority of my relatives still live in Hong Kong. So, I only have one aunt (and her family) and one set of grandparents to put up with. As tradition goes, my parents usually host a dinner, and we all come together, exchange presents, have some mindless chit chat and get on with our lives at the end of the night. Oi. How I dread it every year. I see my aunt and grandparents regularly, but it’s just something about the holidays that gets everyone stark raving mad.
Grandparents - Unfortunately, they’re poor and they don’t have any assets. So, they rely on my dad and his sister to take care of them. They live at my aunt’s house for the majority of the time. We have a room for them, but they only come here to live for a week or so during the major holidays and/or when they want a break from my cousin. My grandmother is annoying in the way that she has to comment on every single freaking thing. My brother talks about the technology of computers, and telling my uncle how turning them on and off is bad. My grandmother, who knows absolutely nothing, repeats what he says, and pretends she knows what the hell everyone is talking about. We call her on it, but to no avail, she keeps doing it. My grandfather is picky. He’s actually not too bad, but he and my grandmother bicker a lot. Especially when she’s commenting on every single freaking thing.
Aunt - She yells. My uncle does something bad, she yells at him and picks him apart in front of us. Stuff that should be said behind closed doors are left for all to see and hear. She also yells at her sons, though not without reason. It’s annoying nonetheless.
Uncle - To put it simply: I hate him. He’s the worst of the worst when it comes to relatives. He’s lazy, annoying and a fucking jackass. He works “part time” but according to my grandparents, he’s out at 9 in the morning, and is back by noon. He spends the rest of the day watching television and gambling. When he’s at our house, he takes over the tv and tries to watch the horse races. My dad got so annoyed he locked the channels, and he keeps asking me to unlock it even though I don’t know the codes myself. This brings me to another thing. He’s always asking me to do things. I don’t mind doing things for people if they’re polite, but the way he wants me to do things is annoying. He uses the indirect method to ask for things. Say my cousin wants something to drink. He tells his dad, then my uncle says something along the lines of “Ask your cousin for something to drink.” While giving me sideway glances. My mom leaves out cookies for us to eat, my cousin wants some and grabs a whole bunch, my uncle then points to me and says “Now she’ll have to put more cookies out.” Repeat this about a hundred times each time we see each other. Uuugghh.
Cousins - I have two cousins. One is my age, and the other is four years younger than me. The one who is my age isn’t too bad, but he has a temper and like his mom, he gets into a screaming match with his dad when things call for it. I don’t talk to him much. The younger one is probably not the byproduct of my aunt and uncle, but some sort of demon spawn. He apparently has ADHD, but his parents won’t put him on drugs. He runs around the house jumping up and down, touching everything in sight, jumps on the furniture, throws things around, kicks his dad in the ass, basically being a pain in the ass. He used to try to get to me, but one time I grabbed his neck and gave him a slap on the head that brought tears to his eyes. Now he stays away from me although I can still hear him jump up and down and kicking his dad in the ass.
Dad - is a fucking hypocrite. Lots and lots of examples I can lay out for this one, but the one thing that stands and over and over again is when my aunt and the cousin my age are hashing it out over school and the amount of studying he does, my dad jumps in, and tries to be the peacemaker. He says things like “Oh, it’s winter break, let the kid relax and he’ll hit the books when classes start again.” But this whole week, what has he been saying to me? “You’re always sitting around the house. I never see you study. Why aren’t you studying?” He’s also bigoted and an asshole, and he owes me four months worth of allowance.
Mom - She chooses not to listen to people. If she’s caught being contradictory, or called out on something, she ignores it. You can repeat the same thing ten times and she’ll still be blanked out and unresponsive. She also hates being looked down on. She has to be better than people in every aspect of everything. The problem is, she isn’t, and she ends up looking like the biggest poseur.
Brother - man oh man, is he ever annoying. You know the thing they call sibling rivalry? It extends far beyond that. I’m lucky enough that his room is downstairs and I never have to see him if it doesn’t call for it. He thinks he’s so much better than me because he’s older. Truth is, he’s not. He’s an annoying prick who berates me whenever he gets a chance. It was a rare moment, when my cousin and I were discussing alcoholic beverages. I was telling him how absolutely discusting I think beer is, but enjoy Smirnoff once in a while. My cousin was asking me why I didn’t like beer. My brother jumps in, though no one invited him into the conversation, and says “She’s just an idiot who doesn’t know how to drink. Beer is fucking awesome!! Dumbass!!” Excuse me for having different tastes. I was telling my aunt how my friend had to work on boxing day and there was no amount of extra pay that could get me to work on boxing day. My stupid brother said something along the lines of “What? I thought you liked working and making money to buy worthless crap.” Note that my brother is 23 years old, living in my parents’ basement. He doesn’t have a job. He doesn’t pay rent. He owes about $20 000 in student loans. He’s not LOOKING for a job. He sits at home all day and either watches t.v. or plays with his computers. He is, in all aspects, a bum.
Me - I’m sullen and moody and when people say things I don’t like, I give them death looks. I also have my headphones on all the time and basically deaf to the outside world. I’m anti social and while my family is outside my room right now laughing and having mindless chit chat, I’m on my laptop posting on a message board.
Oh the joys of the holidays. :rolleyes:
