I didn’t invent a time machine to win at gambling; I invented a time machine to travel through time!
Just my luck I’d get a Cleveland Guardians jersey and they’d revert to being the Cleveland Indians and it wouldn’t work.
But yes I’d certainly wear it enough to make them win the World Series at least once during my lifetime.
This is an interesting conundrum, in that you certainly don’t want to remove the enjoyment of watching your favorite team, which of course requires the jeopardy that they might lose. It could be fun to watch how they are going to win, but knowing they will win definitely change the experience and would probably ruin it over time.
I think I would do one of two things:
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Pick a team I didn’t really care about and use it only for gambling purposes. Just make reasonable-sized bets at various online sports books a few times a year and make a good living that way. Basically a fool-proof retirement plan.
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Pick a team I really did care about and use it just enough to make sure they make it to the playoffs. Then keep it off unless they are in a must-win situation, or the championship series. If it got to Game 7 of the World Series, I’m not sure what I would do… probably wear it for the first one and then take my chances on the others. After making it to the WS 3 or so years I would probably only use it to help them make the playoffs and let it ride after that.
In reality, it might be more fun to have the Anti-Magical Jersey. One I could wear in secret and guarantee that my rival would lose…
And the price is:
Every time you use the jersey, you lose a bit of your sports soul. Sure, many people would say “it’s just my sports soul”, but after a few games or a few seasons they’re wishing the monkey paw had another finger.
The real question is, what kind of person would accept as a gift this magical jersey?
Interestingly, my immediate gut reaction to that is “There is no ethical or philosophical issue here at all, I am wearing that jersey until Arsenal is playing in the Southern Combination Football League Division Two”.
Back to the OP, consider that, although wearing the jersey sacrifices your own personal enjoyment of the game, you’d be bringing joy to your friends and family who support the same team and wouldn’t know that their incredible run of championships was in any way tainted. So maybe you should sacrifice your own sports happiness to bring joy to others?
I would tell the whole world about this magic jersey. First, trials monitored by skeptics, statisticians and other academics that confirm that it works exactly as the OP says it does. Thus initiating the greatest scientific and metaphysical inquiry in History. That has to be worth more than merely taking your bookie to the cleaners.
Me.
I have a kid to help support.
It’s only value is to win bets. I can cash in on a bet that my team wins 4 in a row. Let’s make it rain.
Other than that, it’s useless. I mean, I’d rather have a jersey for a team I don’t care about at all, like the Diamondbacks. Give them a few fake ass winning streaks during the year and rack up some cash, then let them fend for themselves in the post season.
I love this question.
First of all, I would definitely accept the jersey. If I don’t, some Phillies or Braves fan might accept the offer and I can’t abide that possibility.
So I’ll take a 1986 Keith Hernandez jersey, pinstriped whites, please.
And then I’ll put it in my closet, where it will remain mostly untouched forever. As others have said, for me most of the joy of sports comes in the uncertainty of the outcome; take that away and even a Mets World Series parade would be completely empty. For me, even using the jersey to win a critical game down the stretch or in the playoffs would spoil everything. I’m not going to ruin for myself one of my top five sources of happiness in the world just to earn some money and probably get beaten up by some bookie.
That said, I would use the jersey in extremely limited situations. Did I have a shitty work day some random late August Thursday, with the Mets playoff situation already locked up one way or another? Yeah, maybe then. Taking my son to a game in person, and want to give him the thrill of a surprise win against some juggernaut in a lost season? Most definitely. And I might make a bet or two on those very rare occasions - nothing dramatic, just enough to have a nice dinner or whatever.
Umm…lots? I can imagine countless sports fans who’d accept it in a heartbeat.
I think I may have to wear the magical jersey for the Bears so they can go undefeated, win the Super Bowl, and then I could retire it. I may or may not bet on these games along the way (wink wink).
Interesting corollary – Would this work in pro wrestling? What if I wore an Iron Shiek shirt for his match against Hulk Hogan on January 23, 1984?
Sorry but I’ll have to disqualify this use; pro wrestling is not a “sport” in the sense I am using it.
Probably would get Iron Sheik fired for not following the script.