Contact with the Schiaparelli lander lost after parachute deployment, mission control waiting on downlink from other orbiters.
Meanwhile, ExoMars orbiter was entering orbit around Mars, and it will be another hour for word to get back if that was successful.
I’m pissed, too, bro.
I told them they should have installed the anti-Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator defense system, but they said it wasn’t necessary.
Idiots.
Better send up a manned mission to investigate.
There’s a message back from Mars.
Signed Emperor Opportunity I, First of Its Name, Ruler of the Martian Lands.
I wonder how much it would cost to send German mercenaries to Mars.
Are the insurance companies paying more for them dying on the effort? 
Debunking note of the day: it is likely that Ben Franklin was not the author of “The Sale of the Hessians” letter.
Attention all planets of the solar federation. We have assumed control.
Only if they use NASA parachutes
Too soon?
So another probe broke at Mars. Toughen up - it’s named for the God of War, not the God of Warranties!
I once read that Mars is considered to be the Bermuda Triangle of the Solar System.
BWA-HA-HA !!!
Campers, it’s a piece of shit planet. We had fuckin’ aliens warning us about Europa, but Mars? Who gives a fuck?
Why is this in The BBQ Pit?
Next time bring more gun, bitches.
Signed : The Mars Global Defence Force
Challenge. ACCEPTED!
Signed: 'MURICA!
Mars needs women.
Bruno Mars?
Landing any craft on a planet has challenges, but apparently Mars is an extra pain in the ass. It has enough atmosphere to burn up a ship on entry, but not enough for a parachute to slow it down enough for anything approaching a safe landing speed.
I guess Matt Damon isn’t coming home after all…