Too hysterical not to share. I’m giggling. I’m snorting, for god’s sake.
In response to a lovely one-liner message this evening:
Question for the females…What does a typical email you receive look like?
Here is a short sampling of the typical email I receive
"Hi, I find you interesting and would like to know more about you. If you are interested email me so we can talk. "
"How’s it going? I like alot of what you say in your profile. Especially that you aren’t into the bar thing and that you’re close with your family. If you like what you see in my profile, let me know. 
"
“Hey how are you?”
“hi”
“i just wanted to say that your profile is nice and you seem like a really cool laid-back guy. if you ever wanna hang, let me know.”
and on and on and on.
Is that what your’s tend to look like as well? I’m just curious if a well written (if a bit long) email stands out and makes you think “Hey, maybe this guy is worth talking to” or do you get enough well written ones that it might not stand out as much as I think it does.
I was going to post an example, but I can’t find a good one to post here since they all need to be read in the context of the other persons profile. As a stand alone email they would come off very strange. But I spend probably twenty minutes or so putting them together, proofreading, making sure any references to their profile are correct. They tend to be 1-3 paragraphs long…basically, the longer the profile is the longer the email is.
Yes, most of the messages I receive are generic one-liners. Yes, I pretty much ignore them.
A really clever one-liner will get my attention, but it has to be really clever, and most people are just not that clever.
So yes, a paragraph that comments on a mutual interest and tips off a conversation about it, it’ll definitely stand out, and unless there’s some huge deal-breaking incompatibility evident from your profile, I’ll respond. I’ll even respond if the deal-breaker doesn’t break the deal for friendship, although it will come up in the course of conversation that I’m looking at this as friends-only (although honestly I’ve been having way more fun with the friends than with others).
SO’s mom was complaining that she gets one-liners or, worse, a portion of his profile copied and pasted :smack:.
That’s like sending your resume as the cover letter. 
[Bragging] I just sent an email to someone and she replied within ten minutes[/bragging]
I sent her a nice email and at the end thanked her for her good grammar/spelling/etc blah blah blah and then I realized, after I sent it, mine had a bunch of grammar errors. They were just artifacts of editing, but there were there none the less. I quickly sent her another email and told her I was distracted trying to write the email and watch the miners at the same time. The first line of her reply was "You are very articulate so the spelling isn’t a big deal.
If I thought you were the kind of guy who had to really think hard about spelling, I don’t think I would be responding to this e-mail. "
I’m pretty sure that’s a good sign. It sounds to me like she’s the type of person (like me) that wouldn’t strike up a conversation with someone who’s profile or email was full of spelling errors or 733t sp3@k…that’s something I look for in another person…oh, and she a robotics engineer.
A robotics engineer, you say?
I got another of those “someone chose you on Quickmatch” e-mails, full of pictures of women 200 miles away and in their 20’s. I suspect some sort of corporate skullduggery.
Check them all, I’ll bet one of them has a profile asking you to check out her webcam.
Good thing she didn’t also assume that you misspelled “minors” there. 
Yes, that might have been a problem (and we learned in another thread I don’t always notice the difference).
Has anyone else noticed a seasonal effect on the activity at your dating site?
I’ve been at it for a bit more than a year now. I started in August last year and got just a few responses. Then all of a sudden later inte the fall the pace picked up and I got a lot more replies to my e-mails and dates up until December. Admittedly this could be because I was getting better at the whole thing but since the pattern has appeared again maybe there is an effect.
January through March were pretty dead with an abysmal response rate and few dates. Even the number of visits to my profile was really low. This happened to coincide with a really cold winter. Then all of a sudden when the sun came out it started to pick up again.
Come August again the pace slowed down and now late September and October I am getting lots of hits, and responses again. My interpretation of the low in August is that people are coming back to work after the vacation and simply are to busy to date.
Which site are you on? On Match.com I suddenly got this huge spike in people that were interested in me a few months back. Where I was getting one or two emails a week I was suddenly getting one or two a day plus a few winks each day on top of that. Couldn’t figure it out, new picture? better profile? A few weeks ago I figured it out. Yahoo! Personals closed down and told all their members to go over to Match. All the free subscription people were sending the winks and interests and the emails were from the new paid subscribers.
And I was really hoping it was the new profile picture.
You sound sad, but hey more traffic to your profile means more likely of getting dates. I’ve had very poor luck and even horrible-er dates, so I’m giving up for awhile.
So, earlier today someone looked at my profile. I could tell from the spacing that her’s was fake and a bit of googling proved this to be the case. I sent her an email with the subject line “I bet you’re fake” and the body “So I reported you!” I just got a (canned) response of "Hello! I am very pleased that you wrote to me. I am interested in building a serious relationship. What interested you? If you are interested in getting acquainted with me, I am able to communicate only via email. You can leave me your email address and I’ll write you more about yourself and make more of their photos. Drop me a line. "
So, I think I’m going to send her my email address and see how long it takes before I get a webcam link sent to me. Nah, screw it.
Nothing remotely like this has ever happened to me on eHarmony, FWIW.
I’m not too happy with EHarmony. I’ve got a 4 month subscription (3 months plus 1 free) and my plan was to drop down to a free account* with match for a little while. But on EHarmony I’m getting an average of 1-2 new matches per day (most of which are defunct) and that’s just not worth it. My subscription ends on 11/3 at Match and if I’m not actively talking to someone at that point I think I’m going to re-up it.
*I plan to put my email address or facebook username in my profile (hidden from the bots of course) and just tell people to contact me there if they want to send me an email.
I think that would be a very bad idea.
I figure the link would come pretty quickly and then it would start getting spammed. I mean, she CAN email, I received an email so why would she say she can’t…and why do I keep saying ‘she’. Anyways, the profile is gone now.
Throwing my profileback out there in hopes of another critique. I’m not sure what I’m doing wrong. I’m still not getting many messages, and I’ve identified a terrible pattern I’ve gotten myself into. On several ocassions where my rapport with someone reached the phone number exchange stage, pre-date, I’ve found myself talking to a guy for *hours *on the phone, talking about our histories, our thoughts, funny things that happened to us, etc. Then we meet in person, go out on a date, I have a great time, and then… I never hear from him again. It’s all the more upsetting because clearly he liked my personality well enough to talk to me for extended periods. It’s just when they meet me in person that they seem to find me… disappointing. I just can’t figure out what it is unless its my looks.
I’ve been hanging out with one guy I met on OKCupid, and he’s nice enough. Friendly, too touchy-feely, but eager to hang out with me. But although he’s not at all unattractive, I don’t feel any ‘spark’ with him. Like someone else said, he doesn’t make me want to take off my pants. I feel terrible because I don’t want to lead him on, but at the same time he’s one of the few who seems to really want to see me. But surely he deserves someone who wants to see him just as much.
No, it’s not that.
Don’t know what it is, but definitely not that.