I thnk she meant “please put 20 bucks into my G sring, but no touching, because this isn’t that kind of club”
I had a recent experience where the woman in question lives a few hundred miles away. Some of the highlights:
[ul]
[li]She repeatedly told me she wished I lived closer[/li]
[li]She said she’d been checking her phone every five minutes for a couple of hours, hoping for a message from me[/li]
[li]She told me how many times she’d masturbated that day, hoping to “give me a little thrill”[/li]
[li]She told me she was going to fly to my city so we could meet in person[/li][/ul]
Then she suddenly stopped answering my emails, refused to talk to me anymore, and wouldn’t tell me why.
So obviously these were not clear signs of interest, and I was a moron for mistaking them.
She either had a boyfriend that found out, or she chickened out, for various reasons. Not that that excuses it.
I had a similar experience, he even talked about the way he preferred my hair, and talked about stuff that was months into the future, but he wasn’t interested in anything more than a carnal/casual relationship. Perhaps your person just found someone else?
I also think sometimes people make comments like that without really paying attention to what they are saying because they are 1. horny, or 2. just craving attention.
Okay, I’ll play:
Hung out with a guy for pretty much the month of December. If friends were out, he txted me or I txted him and we went wherever the other one was. Never made it home before 3 a.m. Went to a movie with two other friends, cuddled a bit in the movie. A couple days after New Year’s he walked me to my car after a birthday party for his friend at his house… Hot kissing ensued. Next day, I got a “Thanks for hanging out” text. He did not respond to any of my invitations to go out again after that.
I must be a horrible kisser. 
I’ve had women show signs of interest, then exercise (and arguably abuse) their right to shut it all down. I’ve applied for jobs with employers who were only auditing the labor market against their true intention of promoting from within. I’ve worked in sales/customer service where customers were only browsing/checking prices.
The last is the worst, because with blue balls I only need a Kleenex, but a fucking boss demanding why I didn’t “close the deal” requires a Smith & Wesson.
A hot little brunette came rushing over to me at a party. She started asking me all sorts of questions about the sporty stuff I did: Do I still rock climb, who is my usual climbing partner, which climbing gym I went to, do I usually go a weekdays etc. It was like a thousand different questions and she was clearly really interested in all my answers. I swear she was hanging on my every word!
So she was trying to figure out when she could accidentally-on-purpose bump into me at the climbing gym… and thusly run into my climbing partner! They’ve been together four years now. :smack:
To let me know that I’m her best guy friend I guess. I haven’t talked to her in about three years. 
Skald - maybe she was making a shallow judgment based upon the kind of car you drove? Any chance she decided you weren’t as wealthy as she originally thought?
I was in a situation like this, almost to the letter. IMHO, I think she just wanted a one night stand/quickie. i think. I, also, went home without the number. didn’t get any, either.
hh
I think you need some kind of resolution before you post in threads like this. I’m not saying this to take potshots at you, but, clearly, you aren’t comfortable working with the OP as such. BTW, this thread is fantastic, and you are way the heck off in your assesment, and you need some extreme counselling. If you come onto a thread to say these threads suck, then you might be better served by going onto a thread that suits your needs.
Best wishes,
hh
Nope. In perspective, she probably thought that you were a player, and you let her down. She wanted a hot one night stand, with no attachments, and here you were, wanting to get married. (hyperbole) This drove her estrogen level down into the abyss.
Attend!
hh
My guess at what happened, Skald, is that you were jumping through her hoops. You told a funny joke, then she kept asking your to tell more jokes, which you did. She was using you as her personal entertainment center. Obviously I wasn’t there, but I’m making an educated guess that she went to the store with you as a sort of carrot to keep you interested in her so she could continue to be entertained, which was her only interest in you.
What could have been done instead was to tell the joke, then when she clamors for more, you demonstrate your self worth by basically saying no to her, but in a cocky, almost funny sort of way… something like, “Hey, only one per night. Otherwise I will have to charge you.” That way you are not being rude, but at the same time you are demonstrating that you are confident in yourself and not some performing monkey. Then you can direct the conversation toward attracting her by showing her the person underneath that you really are.
She’d already been in the car, remember? We’d gone to the store together for ice – at her insistence–and the lap bouncing happened after we got back.
I’m going with this or she just wanted to get boned and didn’t want your number.
It’s funny for someone like myself old enough to remember the high-water mark of the Sexual Revolution, when there would regularly appear magazine articles lamenting “the death of flirting,” a pleasant, harmless exchange from a more innocent yet in some ways more sophisticated time, compared to the 1970’s when people would oafishly haul off and fuck each other.
later, due to AIDS or shifting demographics or whatever, flirting made a comeback, and nostalgia diminished as everyone re-learned what this pleasant, harmless exhange actually was the majority of the time: a nasty game of “whoever cares less, wins.”
The biggest one was repeatedly asking for naked pictures of me, till I had to tell him to back the hell off. Once that ended, we got to know each other and I realized he was actually pretty sexy, so I kissed him hard and let him know that I would be interested in more. His eyes got huge and he basically all but ran away.
Of course, he was also a lot younger than me, and had never had a woman come on to him before, so that’s most of why he was freaked out. Still, though!
How is that different from getting along with someone at a party, regardless of gender? She wasn’t telling enough jokes of her own?
This. That Chris Rock bit where he talks about a woman deciding she’s going to sleep with a man, and thinking, “I hope he don’t say nothing too stupid,” should be required viewing for men.
With a little more awareness of your surroundings, you can pinpoint the exact moment when you said something too stupid.
There isn’t any difference IF **Skald ** IF he wasn’t trying to interpret any signals from her AND he wasn’t interested in her. But he was showing interest in her beyond just hanging out. If he wanted to attract her, he needed to show her he was more than just her personal entertainment for the evening.