After the PeePee sweater incident, where I inadvertently tossed my pretty green sweater into the open and previously-used-without-flushing toilet, I thought perhaps, I’d had enough peepee incidents for a bit. But noooooooo, the peepee fun had just begun.
My two and a half year old is potty training. I’m old and he’s my third so I’m pretty laid back about this and just letting him go at his own pace. He has recently discovered, in his endless quest to wear me out completely, that peeing is not just for the potty. It can be done most anywhere and into many clever places. He has tried to pee on the dog, into an upside down Lego block, and in the dog’s water bowl. He seems to take great care in aiming so it does give me hope for the future. Today, I was sitting at the computer and he was playing near me, naked as usual cause God forbid he should keep his clothes on for more than five minutes. I turned to find him with his little peemaker lodged in the open end of the vacuum cleaner hose with his legs slightly bent in what I know is his “I’m peeing” position.
I shouted his name between snorts of laughter, grabbed the hose from him and he proceeded to continue peeing all over the floor. As I’m yanked the hose away, I watched all of the peepee that had already gotten into the tube, come out of the tube with reckless abandon all over the place. It was raining peepee. The dog looked amused safely tucked away under my desk.
It’s just been a peepee kind of day, I guess.
OMFG! That is too funny! I’m laughing WITH you, dear, not AT you! Really! 
i hope it was a wet-dry vac. 
thanks for a good laugh.
Thank heaven for little boys . . .
My MIL loves to tell the story of her 3 boys all standing around the toilet bowl, trying to have the “top stream”… I can’t even imagine the mess!! :eek:
I’m so glad I had a girl.
Boys (in my vast experience) are notorious for making all kinds of messes peeing. Altough I must say when my oldest boy was potty training and he discovered he could make bubbles while peeing life became much simpler.
Just wait 'til he discovers he can write on brick and concrete walls using the same technique! 
I once asked my Japanese husband if Japanese boys write their names in the snow, like European kids do. He said that of course they do, and then gave a big grin and said “But you have to have a special technique to write the characters properly!”
(You can’t write them in one go, but have to keep stopping and starting, and some lines have kind of “flicks” to the ends of them!!)
Thanks for the encouragment, guys! After those stories and tips,
I’m thinking about redecorating in plastic. The whole house. Plastic floors, plastic furniture, plastic Mom. The dog is with me on this.
Perhaps you just need to wait till there is snow, and show him the joy of writing in it. I bet that will beat out the vacuume hose, and maybe it will be chilly enough for him to keep some clothes on.
Thanks for the story. Always good to start the morning with a good laugh. On the bright side, it is clear your kid is smart as a whip, he will learn to use his powers for good. :rolleyes:
So this is what I have to look forward to? And we found it heartily amusing when the boy peed on his own head… he is only 6 weeks old though.
The girl doesn’t even want to hear the word potty all of a sudden. If I say anything about it she says “nooooo” in her special little way and goes and stands on her head.
Life with munchkins
When my first born was 3 days old my mother-in-law (who insisted on taking care of the baby while I did all the house work) was sitting above his head when I removed his diaper to chane him…little critter let it go right on her glasses. Good shot son…good shot! I knew right then he was a keeper!
Heh. I went through twice as many diapers with FBMC as I did with my daughter. One to hold over him as I took the old diaper off, and the new one to put on him. The kid’s aim was amazing. Extra washcloths for bath time, too.
When he was potty training, our day care lady showed me a great game called “sink the Cheerios.” She explained that little boys like things to aim at (as do big boys, I’ve found), and the game stops them from “aiming” at other things. Like, my plants. Or, the cat. Who was less than amused.
Ya think if I just put the dog in the toilet, it’ll work?
Y’know, there’s a real good way to teach him not to put his wee-wee in a vacuum cleaner’s hose…
rotfl… I was just thinking that may not be the last ‘encounter’ with the vacuum cleaner … but the next one won’t be for a few years …
I think the target in the toilet is a great plan, but the dog would probably rather you used the cat …
I am guessing you have a little dog. When I first read this I had a picture of a two year old littl boy, naked as a jay bird taking aim at a German shepard jammed in the toilet boil, once you get over the massivly disturbing factor it is hysterical.
And Wyatt the vacuum hose . . . really???
That IS an hysterical picture!
and as to vacuum hoses … well … it’s just what I’ve heard … ya know …
I, myself, don’t fit, of course … NOT that there is any reason that I KNOW that, mind you …
just sayin’
note to self … STOP DIGGING
A favorite memory in our family is that when my brother was a baby, my mom brought him into the pediatrician, and bro promptly let loose when the doctor was standing over him examining him - and managed to go clear over the doctor’s shoulder! Now that’s a good stream!
Susan
My sis tried the Cheerio method when her boys were young. Unfortunately, the youngest didn’t think anything wrong with digging in and eating said targets.
~urp~
You can find toilet targets in specialty stores. She bought little tissue paper ships that were well sunk and luckily, not tempting to the runt.
And I too bless having a daughter. HOWEVER, when she was three, after watching boys pee, she learned if she “adjusted” herself just right, she could aim almost as well as the boys. Thank Dog she only did that outside.