Hurricane Katrina? That was me. Sorry. My bad.
Geez, lay off the beans next time, will ya?
You so did not, you fibber. My dad did.
I’m sorry I caused all that cancer.
AND…?
I’m sorry for causing all the gay. And the straight.
Well given that gay marriage is the ultimate cause of everything bad, you’re responsible for 9/11, John Lennon’s death AND Katrina.
It was homebrew.
There’s a difference between not going, and having class cancelled. We had homeworks due, assignments, all that garbage. If I just didn’t show up, I’d have to turn them in late. If class was cancelled, I could ignore doing them the next morning, and just do them for the next class.
Even worse, since I was living at home at the time, if I didn’t go to class, I’d have to explain myself to my father. I tell ya, its a heck of a lot easier just to go.
After consulting with my friends, we have confirmed that the cost would be far more than the Earth’s current population. Sorry… 
If it’s not too late yet, I’d like to claim at least one of the Kennedy assassinations. I realize that I wasn’t born yet, but as someone who is currently demon possessed, I’m positive I worked out a deal somehow. Because you know, as a former fundamentalist, it was absolutely required that I have it in for them there Catholics. All hail Jack Chick!