The SIL, again....

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I have moaned and whinged about my SIL before, and I beg your indulgence to do so again. The SIL is the wife of my wife’s brother. She has spent over the last 3 years thousands [sic]of dollars on medicines, trainers, camps, special diets, and psychiatrists for the dog she got from a dog rescue service. I note parenthetically that my wife and I help pay the university tuition and other expenses of her two kids. The dog acts fine except when interacting with the SIL, when he barks until she give him dry food and is generally a pain in the butt until SIL leaves. Pooch sits and is quiet for everyone else.

SIL has recently determined the pooch is allergic to beef. I know this happens, but isn’t this more likely to be an allergy or sensitivity to beef proteins in dry food? Whatever. Sadly, SIL decided to give the pooch kangaroo bones on Christmas Day, which gave the poor fellow explosive diarrhea. Said details of which were her main topic of conversation at Christmas dinner, mercifully held at another house. Oh, and for the family meal, SIL brought mashed potatoes, the preparation of which required her to text my wife 4 [sic] times over 2 hours for instructions. She also asked us to prepare mac and cheese along with the 5 other dishes we were bringing because, and I quote, “I love mac and cheese but it takes too long to make the sauce.”

Not asking for help or suggestions or anything, just some MPSIMS. Thanks, doc, I see our time is up, these sessions really seem to help.

2

Its very good of you to help out with college expenses. Hopefully, the kids will graduate and find good jobs so they can move far away from someone who thinks her money is better spent on a rescue critter than her children’s future.

(And yes, I admit to wasting much more money than is wise on animal rescue, but no children were hurt and nobody else was ever asked to finance my living expenses in the process.)

3

Sound like the biggest problem with the dog is your sister-in-law which totally sucks for the dog. She sounds like an all-around unpleasant person. That being said, why are you paying for her kids to go to college in the first place? Is is because she spent the money on the dog that she cannot pay for college herself? If not, what does it matter? If so, and you don’t like how she spends her money, stop paying.

Also, Why do you keep pointing out that it’s a rescue dog. Would you feel justified in her expenses if it were a purebred purchased from a breeder?

4

He’s bitching because she’s a bitch. There’s nothing wrong with the dog.
It sounds like she needs to learn how to use google. M…a…s…h…e…d P…

5

Please tell me she didn’t need to ask 4 questions to make boxed instant mashed potatoes.

6

God.
That’s horrid.

7

Unless my eyes are going, I only see the part about the dog being a rescue dog brought up once - possibly to explain why it may have extra needs.

I’d have a hard time feeling okay about about paying for their college to subsidize the SIL’s dog. I’d probably be here unloading about it, too.

8

Yes, that’s why I mentioned that it’s a rescue dog: SIL knew there would be “issues” going in and simply didn’t take that into account. Who sends the dog away to camp for a week because “I need a break from all the work it involves? Which is feeding, opening the door for it to poop, and playing with it…the dog is fine with others.

We help the niece and nephew out because frankly, the SIL cannot budget or even shop economically and spends money irrationally, often on unnecessary medical procedures and quack therapy for herself, her kids when they were younger, and now the dog. If they had more money, she would spend that too. The kids are great, we’ve known them since they were sonograms, they work while going to school, and if we didn’t help them, their lives would be harder. But it is galling when SIL admits she has problems around attention deficit, anxiety, etc., and refuses to get help. Also, I sliced my finger grating the cheese for the mac and cheese she requested for Christmas when I jumped when the phone rang as she called for instructions on potatoes. Which may be the real cause of my ranting.

Also, the potatoes were real potatoes, but she called to ask
How many potatoes should I buy? (About 6 pounds, like we said when you asked a week ago when you volunteered to make them. The text was still on her phone)
Should I boil them whole or cut them? (They’re russets, if you bought the ones we suggested when you asked, so cut them)
Can I mash them in my blender? (No. Trust us, it’s not the way to go)
Should I put them in a lasagna pan or a bowl? (Pan. They’re going to be reheated in the oven and the bowl ISN’T OVENPROOF, the pan means the top won’t burn while the centre remains cold, we suggested the pan a week ago, and she brought them in the bowl, which ISN’T OVENPROOF, anyway.)

And this just in: SIL has cannabis prescription for the dog and says she’s taking it herself. No one knows if she is kidding, or whether it would be better if she wasn’t kidding.

She’s wreaking persistent, if low-level, havoc, and people are drifting away as her behaviour continues, which makes her feel bad, which intensifies the weird behaviour, and she is still not taking the suggestions for help. And most of all, I have a cut on a fretting finger thanks to her phone call!

Again, thanks, Doper therapists!

9

I’m so sorry. Perhaps she could be placed on an island with my MiL. The island for difficult relatives. It has a ring to it. I like it.

10

Will poll family and ready Thunderbird 3 for immediate transport!

11

We’re going to need a bigger island.

12

Nah. Overcrowding recommended!
~VOW

13

You and your wife are good people, Kropotkin, for helping with the kids.

Is there any way to get SIL some psychological help, instead of quack therapies? Sounds like she needs some.

I’d recommend some polysporin for the finger.

14

What does your wife’s brother say about all this, if anything?

15

He’s exhausted and has some major back/issues.His hope to retire next year is done, as SIL just blows through the money. It’s obvious that she does this from anxiety and other issues. My sense is he does not have the capacity right now to push things to a better resolution, and he is fraying. Despite my bitching and snarking, we really love these people and it is the heartbreak of it all that reduces me to venting. The two snipe a little at each other in public and it can be tense to be around them. We’ve suggested counselling, but how often can you do that? Thoughts welcome!