In the original story when Prometheus stole fire and gave it to man, he gave it to them by sneaking up behind a man with a lit torch and sticking it between his legs. Zeus thought that was hilarious until Prometheus did it to him. Many generations later someone figured out it could be used for cooking food too.
Jupiter has 315 moons; Saturn has 287; the orbits of both planets’ outer moons are so wide that when Jupiter and Saturn pass each other, they swap a few satellites.
Jackie Robinson was not, in fact, the first black player in modern major league baseball- Yankees pitcher Allie Reynolds was. Reynolds hid his black ancestry and explained away his dark complexion by pretending to be an American Indian. He was given the nickname “Chief” as a resault.
Research and testing on submarine designs happened as early as 1795 in Britain. But it was not until the Americans had the inspiration to actually run their submarines UNDER the water that they succeeded.
In 1962, six years before he assassinated Martin Luther King Jr., James Earl Ray was a losing contestant on the TV game show*** Name That Tune.*** He might have won if he’d been able to identify “People WIll Say We’re in Love” from ***Oklahoma!, ***in 4 notes.
Lottery winners have a depression rate higher than soldiers with PTSD
Plant life does not grow upward out of the ground; it is pulled up by the combination of Solar and Lunar gravity, just like the tides.
Shortly before joining the Union on June 1, 1796, Tennessee declared war on the country of Finland, and forcibly expelled all Finnish-Americans from the state (nineteen people in all).
The reasons remain unclear.
What is clear is that to this day, there are no Finnish-Americans in Tennessee, Ole Miss still refuses to accept Finnish exchange students, and singing or even just humming (!) the Finnish national anthem within the state’s borders can land you a night in jail.
As a result of the above, more than 2.85 million Finnish-Americans live in Kentucky, equivalent to 67% of the state’s total population. In fact, the state recently passed a bipartisan initiative to change the state’s name to “Helsinkiana”, but was overturned by the state supreme court after millions of dollars in lobbying by the Kentucky Fried Chicken corporation, who accurately pointed out that the expense of changing their brand name worldwide would bankrupt the entire state.
The “jiggle” bed was invented in 1938 by Dr. Andrew M. Jiggle, to relieve patients’ sciatica while they slept. Having to put quarters in every 2 hours seemed to defeat the purpose, though.
The first Fleshlights actually had bulbs on them so they could be hidden in plain sight, left in the open and used as flashlights.
These satellites are usually little more than snowballs. Occasionally a particularly-fragile one is broken during the transfer, and the fragments contribute to the rings of Jupiter and Saturn.
Lingering Finnish animosity towards the South also played a crucial role in the Northern victory during the Civil War.
See, the Swedish inventor John Ericsson was originally working for the Southern side, but after a five-week sex strike from his comely Finnish-American wife, he switched sides due to what he later described as “a poisonous overabundance of gross humours most painfully animating my amorous propensities.”
The result? The USS Monitor was built for the Northern navy instead, and went on to kick rebel ass at the Battle of Hampton Roads.
In Finland, a feast in the memory of Ericsson’s wife, “our Finnish Lysistrata,” is held every year on the sixth or seventh of August. Somewhat counterintuitively, Mrs. Ericsson’s memory is honored by vigorous and oftentimes exceedingly noisy lovemaking.
Bonus trivia: Since the feast coincides with the Finnish blueberry harvesting season, blueberries are also eaten in great quantities throughout the day of the feast.
Through a series of misunderstandings and mistranslations, this has given rise to the expression “blue balls” (from Fin. Ericissoikii blüberinniin, “Ericsson’s blueberries”).
A segue worth remembering.
Ericsson’s sexual proclivities also had a direct influence on the design of the Monitor. It is not a coincidence that the ship looked like a double-ended dildo with testicles in the center.
Update: Jupiter has [del]315[/del] 306 moons; Saturn has [del]287[/del] 291; 3 were pulverized, leaving 2 MIA. 6 others were an even swap.
Sorry, this thread’s for made-up stuff, not actual facts. 
In play:
George R.R. Martin’s infamous “Red Wedding” scene originally took an entirely different tack – in the first draft, nobody perished, the Starks were reunited, Tyrion took a vow of abstinence and celibacy, and the reception ended with Brianna and the Hound falling in love and dancing the night away to the tune of “(I’ve Had) The Time of My Life” played on jugband-style instruments. When Martin’s publishers suggested that the scene didn’t really fit the overall theme of the series, George got pissed off and re-wrote the scene as it’s known today – which explains why the rest of the series is taking so long to finish, because several story threads and character arcs had to be changed on the fly.
I did make that one up.
Or did you? 
There is a popular annual lottery in Sweden based on how many moons Saturn and Juper each have as of January 1. It was thrown into chaos a few years ago by the same astrophysicists who downgrated Pluto to something less than a planet. Now there are also orbiting bodies that are less than moons.