Despite the fact that, in recent years, I have become less religious (and by that, I mean I’ve pretty much stopped going to church), I still actively read about theology. Strangely enough, becoming less religious (or less devout, or whatever), becoming more apathetic about theology/religion/etc, has coincided with my being more curious about theology and wanting to research it more, to learn more about it.
Here are a few things I’ve postulated:
[ul][li]Empirically speaking, the only way we can gain unambiguous, irrefutable knowledge of God is if He gives it to us personally, by showing himself to us, communicating with us, etc.[/li][li]God doesn’t seem to do that a whole lot lately.[/li][li]Everything we think we know about God might be wrong.[/li][li]God might not care about us, whether we believe in Him, worship Him, etc.[/li][li]What we think of as “good” may not coincide at all with what God wants or expects us to do. He might not even care.[/ul][/li]…and so on. And of course, there are these other things:
[ul][li]Some religions teach that if you aren’t a member of them, you’ll go to hell.[/li][li]So, if there is a hell, it’s possible that God’s criteria for determining who goes to heaven and hell are unknowable, unfathomable, or completely different from what we’d expect.[/li][li]If we assume that the nature of God and things about him aren’t knowable or are incomprehensible by us, then it may not matter whether or not we’re religious, what theological stance we have, whether or not we’re “good” people, etc.[/li][li]If God doesn’t exist, it doesn’t really matter anyway.[/li][li]If God is vindictive and smites those who question him, are all persons with a shroud of intelligence doomed to hell?[/ul][/li]…and so on (again).
Now then, assuming that I have essentially determined that it’s possible (and likely) that we can’t fully understand or know about God, and that therefore it’s possible that no amount of theological study or religious devotion can guarantee God’s favor…why am I so curious? Why do so many people spend so much time wondering about these things? What is it that drives us to try to understand the unfathomable?