Perfect!
Well, of course the first thing I did was to see if your pic is up on the SDMB photo gallery. And it is. And you’re cute as hell.
Which means you must be crazy.
So, maybe try not to be so crazy.
Yeah, I’ve got some fond memories of a few solo adventures; but at a movie theater, sometimes it would be nice to have someone to share the popcorn with.
You know, I didn’t think I was going to enter this thread. So my wife cheats. So someone I liked wasn’t interested. OK, so Nobody was interested. So my job is the mental equivolent of being forced to sit on my hands all day while people try to punch me as hard as they can. I hear the winner gets a cigar.
I still have my self respect, and there’s always porn, & Lysol.
Well, two outta three… 
The pathetic thing is that in the mole thread, it almost actually sounded like someone wanted to see the mole on my thigh. How pathetic is it when that becomes the high point of your week?
(…please don’t answer that, I don’t want to know…)
Someone in another thread said that a writer actually Writes. Someone else who I really respect said I needed to be more assertive in getting what I write to people who’ll not only read it, but consider publishing it. Maybe a short story or a chapter a day will do for now. It’d be nice to have 50 or so completed works to show someone. Hey, its less fattening than Snickers and I’m not going anywhere for a while…
Rand Rover is correct.
Certainly the first time I have ever typed that sentence, and I don’t plan to repeating the experience. 
Although many people do find someone on line, the odds are better if you just go outside and play in your local area.
Find some way to do that.
It only hurts the first time.
That’s cause nobody survives.
Like I told my “wife” on our “honeymoon”: Nobody move, nobody get hurt.
ETA: Now that sounds a LOT creepier than I intended it. Oh well. It stays.
I’m going to bed. Miss, you are really cute, you are just having bad luck. Keep swingin’.
Thanks, but there are any number of beautiful young women in this city, so just possessing a face and youth doesn’t get me that far. I feel like I’ve got a cute personality and a lot to offer the right guy – I just don’t get given a chance. I also have the issue that I’m introverted (INTP, in case you know your MBTI) and I came to the realization a while ago that I need someone a little more outgoing than me, or else the relationship never goes anywhere. If I meet similarly introverted geeky guys, we tend to sit in uncomfortable silence. They can’t make eye contact, and I’m not extroverted enough to pull them out of their shells.
MBTI? Occupational hazard… or just too much time on your hands?
Well, since I am going to be banned for my GD post, I will go ahead and say why is this lameass crap in the Pit? Whiny lovelorn bullshit.
Call Dr Phil. Sweet fucking Og, this place has gone to shit. Sounds like an AOL chatroom back in the day.
That was to be expected with the de-nutting of the Pit. It is what it is; accept it or move on.
Which would make them the best people to give advice. They were successful at doing exactly what you want to do.
Quite a lot of people need to learn to stop trying so hard and just enjoy life. Worst case scenario? You don’t find someone, but you still had a good life anyways. But, more often than not, you do find someone eventually.
And, no, it doesn’t mean you give up entirely and stay in your home. You can’t sabotage your chances and expect to win. But it’s obvious that if you constantly pursue, you are going to be constantly rejected. A method that allows you to still screen for mates, while not actually being rejected is thus superior.
And that’s the method people are talking about. Don’t try to force a relationship. Just get to know a lot of people.
Yes, this is true.
Three points:
One: Yes, there are lots of beautiful young women in almost every city but they are still far outnumbered by those who aren’t. Probably seven or eight of every ten women in town are less attractive than you, maybe more. So I don’t think you should dismiss your attractiveness as an asset quite so easily.
Two: You say you have a cute personality but you also say that you’re introverted. Unfortunately, introverted people radiate a sort of force field that says “Don’t bother me. I don’t much like myself and I’m not very much fun.” It’s really true that people largely judge you by the way you appear to judge yourself. If you - who knows yourself better than anyone - don’t appear to think much of yourself, who are they to know better? And then if that introversion carries over into your dates once you get them, that can be a turn off too, because introverted people often have trouble enjoying themselves when out in public or on a date.
So it seems to me you have two choices in this regard, and they would be to decide to go to work on yourself and try to overcome your introverted nature, or to perhaps rethink what you’re looking for in terms of a relationship.
There are courses you can take that are pretty good at helping people to overcome shyness or introversion and become more confident and fun, and perhaps you could read up on and then take one of those courses. I have a cousin who is in his sixties now, but when he was young he was very awkward and ill-at-ease around people and he took one of those courses and wound up spending his life working in sales.
But it can be difficult to become someone you just simply aren’t, and should you not particularly want to work to try to overcome your introverted nature, than I’d say that your other recourse is to try to find someone for whom that introversion isn’t so much a problem and who has the capacity to appreciate you for who you are. Unfortunately (or maybe not) this likely means an older guy. Older men tend to be less judgemental, more understanding and less rigid in what they expect out of a relationship than younger guys and they’ll be more likely to recognize and appreciate the many positive qualities that you undoubtedly posess. (To illustrate this point I’ll bring up a young woman I once knew who was very attractive but also pretty wild, into drugs, and with a ton of personality issues due to having grown up with a mother who hated her, wished she’d never been born, and couldn’t tell her so often enough. She once commented to me that men had to be at least forty before they could handle being with her.) Older men also tend to be more stable financially and that lessens problems in an area where there can be lots of stress with younger guys. So maybe you should think about recalibrating your idea of what you’re looking for in a guy and start looking for someone who’s been around a little while and can appreciate you for who you are and not be put off by the introverted nature of your personality.
And then three: Maybe you should just forget about relationships for the time being and just work on building a happy life doing things that you are already interested in and have fun doing, whether they might be reading, cooking, learning about and enjoying art, music, wines, etc. - just whatever floats your boat. Chances are your interest in and appreciation of those things will eventually bring you into contact with someone of similar interests and who you would be compatible with, and in the meantime you’d still be enjoying a nice, full life filled with fun and interesting things that you enjoy.
And to make this post more Pit-worthy, fuck off, klaatu! Gort was the cool one anyway!
Okay, this is not to pick on anyone, but several people have said the same thing and I think there’s some misunderstanding: I already have a pretty rocking life. In fact, right now my life’s the best its been in years. That doesn’t mean I’m gonna rest on my laurels, but this idea of ‘just concentrate about having a good life’ is sort of perplexing to me when everything BUT my love life is going okay-to-great. The fact that I’m making more money than I’ve ever made before, that I like my roommates and get along well with my family for once, that I’m living in an exciting and beautiful city, that I can go and do as I please, doesn’t affect me wanting and aching for someone special in my life. That desire is still there.
Also, I don’t look at my introversion as a weakness to be overcome. Its a part of me, like how their religion is a part of some people, or being Goth, or whatever. I know myself well enough to know that I will never be some swinging from the rafters type, and I’m okay with that. I’m CONTENT with myself. I look for a partner a bit more extroverted than I am because I am looking for someone who will complement me, just as anyone else might look for a partner who will laugh at their jokes, enjoy their music, spend oodles of cash on them, or whatever else they feel they need. I actually feel like I have way more fun than the average person, and that’s including some extremely extroverted people I know.
Re: older men, I am not averse to the idea of dating men a bit older than I am, but a gigantic age gap doesn’t appeal to me for various reasons. I would actually prefer someone around 30-35, but we don’t always get what we want.
I’m glad to hear your life is considerably better than it sounded based upon the OP. It sounds like you have a better life than many, even without romance. Sounds like once that final peg falls into place you’ll pretty much have it all. I wish you luck in making that happen. (I have something of a soft spot for you because I remember your wanting to “squee” with someone after your discovery of Truman Capote - one of my most favoritist writers of all time. ;))
Sounds like you need an alpha nerd. Have you tried online dating, particularly OKCupid. There are plenty of those on there. I personally have had success on there, although as a non-rich and non-studly guy it did take some effort.
[bolding mine]
So, people who have won the lottery are the best people to ask advice on getting wealthy?
Getting lucky does not mean that the method is the best path forward. It just means that it sometimes works.
Perhaps but as an extremely introverted person myself when you act against that nature and try to be more out going and confident people can see through this as well. When you have naturally shy people attempting to assert themselves if often comes across as lame and fake and that is a turnoff as well. it’s too bad introverts can’t hook up with other introverts at a good rate.