Following NardoPolo’s lead…
I know an old lady who swallowed a sink.
She licked her lips and said “what do you think?”
I said with a frown,
as I pulled her pants down,
“now how do you expect me to get a cold drink?”
How about…
I know an old lady who swallowed a Lincoln…
I know an old lady who swallowed a Lincoln,
What had she been drinkin, To swallow a Lincoln?
She wasn’t thinkin.
I know an old lady who swallowed a sword…
I know an old lady who swallowed a sword,
Silly old broad, to swallow a sword!
She said she was bored,
So she swallowed a sword.
I know an old lady who swallowed an elk…
And she warshed it doon with a gluss of melk.
I know an old lady who swallowed a locksmith…
I know an old lady who swallowed a locksmith
He tasted like chicken she said on the bite fifth
Naked in a henhouse cept a helmet that’s a might pith
She’s quite the key for entertaining the cocks with.
I know an old woman that swallowed a Vega…
I know an old lady who swallowed a locksmith…
She liked Star Trek Spockless,
Amidst talk of apocolypse.
There was an old lady who swallowed a Frisbee…
…Damnéd coworkers delaying while I’m trying to post… You win this time lieu.
There was an old woman who swallowed a Vega
Or an Opel Omega
Driving past Noriega
Who it happened was running a race in Talladega
I know an old lady who swallowed a frisbee…
She leaned in to kizz me,
And I crammed in that frisbee…
I know an old lady who swallowed a parrot…
I know an old lady who swallowed a parrot…
She SWALLOWED a PARROT?
Oh why not a ferret, in a stew with a carrot?
I know an old lady who swallowed a stick…
I know an old lady who swallowed a stick.
She swallowed it rather than give it a lick.
She wound up pooping a huge toothpick!
I know an old lady who swallowed a barn…
Frikkin Geezer, I’ve got to stop laughing before I can post…
I know an old lady who swallowed a barn
About the livestock she gave not a darn
Tis funny the only thing she managed to garn
Was an asshole protusion that resembled red yarn.
There was an old lady that swallowed a Hummer…
I know an old lady who swallowed a hummer
oh what a bummer to swallow a hummer
She needed the help of the local plumber
she’d never done anything dumber
(except maybe that number
with the chummer strummer last summer…)
There was an old lady who swallowed a lake…
You know. Considering what flies are generally found buzzing about and her M.O. from the other animals she’s swallowed I could probably make an educated guess about why she swallowed the fly. …
If you’re playing the game see the previous post.
I know an old lady who swallowed a lake.
Such a thirst to slake! To swallow a lake!
I know an old lady who swallowed an orange . . .
I know an old lady who swallowed an Orange
She turned purple
And stayed like that for a month
But at least she didn’t swallow a wasp.
The End?
I know an old lady who swallowed the universe…
This one calls for Cartooniverse.
I know an old lady who swallowed the universe.
When I asked her why, her answer was terse.
“Astronomers ask, will it expand or contract?
But neither approach is the actual fact.
For I am God and this is the Big Bang in reverse.”
God? You know a very old lady! 