Another glitch in the Matrix.
<small applause>very nice.</small applause>
We’ve stopped taking our Meds, haven’t we, Mr Pullet?
A few years ago, my wife and I took our dog to the animal hospital in New Rochelle, NY. I’m not intimately familiar with New Rochelle, but the area near the hospital did not strike me as rural at all.
While we were waiting for our dog to be seen, we decided to take a walk and find a place to have lunch. We walked up to a steak house, but it was pretty clear that it was not open for lunch. There was a single car in the parking lot. We stopped to rest and to ponder our options on a bench outside the restaurant.
While we were sitting there, a chicken walked out of the wooded lot next to the steakhouse and into the parking lot. Seeing a chicken in an urban environment was strange enough, but what happened next was even stranger. The chicken clucked around the lot a bit, until it was underneath the car. Then it hopped up into the engine compartment. After a few minutes, a brief rolling noise could be heard, followed by a splat. A slightly cracked egg had appeared on the pavement under the car, and began to ooze its contents onto the ground.
Don’t be too quick to discount the most obvious source for your chicken egg.
The egg was put there, and deliberately cracked by someone who preys on people who notice things and wonder about them.
Sadly, I feel like this is what happend (even though logically I know it’s not).
Like, maybe the kids in the neighborhood realize I never leave my house (haven’t left in a while - been way busy in the yard) and put something in the driveway that I’d surely run over if I was ever inclined to leave.
But…I’ve left and returned a buncha times since the egg appeared. My uncle, who’s also a “wonderer” drove past it and made a point not to hit it. My dad, who came by on his lawnmower to mow my lawn, didn’t even notice it.
I ordered a pizza tonight. I wonder if the pizza guy hit it…
In the driveway, no one can hear you scream.
A chicken and and egg were lying in bed after a stormy session of sex. After a few breaths the chicken looked at the egg and said, “Well, at least that answers the question of who came first.”
The egg is gone now. I think the pizza guy did it in last night.
Luckilly, we’ve had a good bit of rain since the demise of the egg and I do not have a steamy pile of scrambled egg in the drive…just some cracked shells, which, I will of course leave there to amuse myself about the egg in the driveway for as long as I can muster.
Oh, heavens, yes. The colors are so much better smelling now.
P.S. “pullet” = female chicken who has not yet started laying eggs. Mrs. Pullet, if you please 
I realize I’m a little late to the party here, however, this reminded me of what happened at work a week or so ago. Sometime between 7 in the morning and noon somebody left a bag of bread and a bag of hamburger buns propped up against a concrete divider in the parking lot. They stayed there for a couple of days and when my grandma picked them up to throw them away she noticed that the expiration date on the bags was in 2006. :dubious: :eek:
Perhaps a stunt team was flying over your house in a biplane while making aerial omelettes, and accidentally lost an egg.
There’s an egg in the middle of my driveway
But is there a crazy bird lady sitting on it? That’s when you have to worry.
I would be totally unsurprised. We have both crows and ravens up here in the San Fransisco Peaks. One of their favorite early-winter-morning games is to fly around one of the bigger campus parking lots and drop pine cones on the cars until they set some alarms off. Then they scatter, screaming at each other.
If you’re walking outside around that time of day, they’ll also play… well, ‘chicken’, really. A whole tree full of them will dive-bomb your head, trying to get as close as they can without actually running into you.
They also raid dumpsters, steal picnic food, cackle obnoxiously at each other at all hours, and annoy the other local wildlife, including the skunks. If pigeons are flying rats, then crows are raccoons with wings.
[/hijack]
You need sustained temperatures of over 100F and blacktop, if you would like to be adventurous and fry the sucker without using one of those aluminum-foil science projects to do it.
On a related note, when you grow up in Phoenix, you learn real fast that walking outside between the end of May and the beginning of October without your shoes on is a phenomenally bad idea.
On a more pleasantly related note, during July and August, you can bake cookies in your car by wrapping the dough loosely in foil and putting it on your dashboard while you spend a few hours shopping.
A couple of years ago, when we had just moved into a new house, we were strolling around the backyard for a while, then walked around to the front. Where we found a dead trout in the bushes. It looked a day or two old, maybe nine inches or so long. Just lying between the bushes in the yard.
We decided that one of the local hawks must have lost its grip on dinner.
Was there a gecko in it?
ENugent … that is so cool. “There was a trout in my bushes” is just so much cooler to say than “there was an egg in my driveway.” I really hope you tell a lot of people about that. That’s just awesome 
I told like 20 people (plus all you guys) about my egg, just because it’s fun to say.
Mama Zappa I thought of my egg as soon as I saw that thread title. LOL
You’re a recipient of a chain-egging! You now have to place an egg in the middle of 12 randome people’s driveways. Otherwise suffer 12 years of bad meraunge mishaps.