When I see animals mating in person, I experience a sort of brief shock or awe. It doesn’t feel bad, but the idea that I’m seeing something intimate is hard to shake. The other night, I saw two raccoons mating. I just couldn’t help but think “they’re…having sex…wow…”
We saw two turtles goin’ at it at the National Aquarium in Baltimore. A little girl, about 3-4, pointed and said: “Massage! Massage!” The dad was like, “Heh - yeah, “massage.”” while I just about died laughing.
Yes I have unfortunately. If I wasn’t already afraid of birds that would have been enough to instill fear. I don’t need nightmares about being gang raped by ducks!
Last month my husband and I went to the Oregon Zoo while on vacation. We were watching some bats when my husband suddenly said, “I think those bats are having sexy time.” Yep, sure enough. We thought it best to leave them to their business.
I once witnessed 2 giraffes at the Lincoln Park Zoo. It was hilarious-and I am a prude! My husband was mortified (he, the porn connoisseur) and kept wanting us to walk away. I just wouldn’t leave. The male eventually gave up–no clue as to why. I will say this: a male giraffe’s er, member is very long and black.
A friend and her husband used to toss the baby in the shower with whoever happened to be there so she learned about the different body parts at a fairly young age.
One day they were at a farm when she saw a horse with an erection and asked her mommy what it was. Mommy said, “It’s the horse’s penis, honey”. The daughter ran to her daddy and said, “DADDY DADDY That horse has a penis JUST LIKE YOURS!!!”
We used to go to the San Diego Zoo all the time when I was growing up, so I got to see many romantic interludes. The galápagos tortoise encounters were always a crowd favorite.
We saw lions mating in the Singapore Zoo. That’s a great zoo, up there with anything in southern California, and the lions have a very large, naturalistic setting. There was one male and two or three females in the enclosure. He did one, rolled around on the ground on his back, did her again and rolled around some more. I think this happened a couple more times, too.
At the San Diego Zoo I thought I was about to see two Galapagos tortoises get it on, because one was (slowly) walking up behind the other and placing its front legs on the other’s shell. But the tortoise continued to climb up on top of the other one and wound up resting on it shell. No joke, one giant tortoise was completely on top of the other in a kind of tortoise pigpile. One of the oddest things I’ve ever seen. (I did get a photo.)