I know, in my logical and educated head, that the earth is round and it rotates in a variety of ways that ultimately ends up with seasons happening in various parts of the world. I even understand that said rotation causes some areas of the earth to be warm when other parts are cold. But, for the life of me, when you Oz people mention that January is a nice summer month, or that April is almost autumn, I cannot get my head around that.
January is WINTER. It’s COLD. There’s snow, and clouds, and you have to wear a coat and boots. It is not when you pull out the barbecue and go to the beach.
I just can’t get it, no matter how much my logical mind tells me it’s true.
That a plane can take off and fly does not freak me out. That it can cross the world and accurately land on the other side on a tiny, tiny strip of concrete does freak me out.
Radio.
Children learning to talk (especially in a foreign language, as that drives the point home more).
Car tyres deforming so many millions of times without breaking.
I get the basics of it. I even mess around with it with my 401k and such.
But how one minute a stock can be worth $37.50 then the next minute be worth $38.45 and how that translates to how said company does business is beyond me.
Like that movie “Trading Places” I’ve seen that movie a hundred times and I still don’t fully understand what the hell they did to make all that money…
think of the stock market as a big game of hot potato:
with few exceptions, people buy stock based on expectations of future value, not current dividends. Yet an actual share is really a certificate entitling you to a percentage of the companies equity - or value after paying off debts and other obligations in the event of a ‘final reckoning’ or liquidation. I.e. - “we’re closing the company, paying off our debts and selling all our assets: here’s your cut”
Since companies virually never ‘unwind’ except in dire circumstances, in fact the value of [your] share would be zero or close to it.
Hence, owning a share, or buying and selling shares is simply a game of hot potato - he who gets stuck wiht the share at the logical termination point of the game (liquidation of the company) loses… kind of like a monster pyramid game actually.
The BTK Killer. They showed him in court describing each killing on the Abrams report in great detail. This is one sick dude. Yet he was calm as a whistle the whole time and very articulate about it. I guess what I really can’t wrap my head around, is that he talked ever so intelligently. You would have never known.
I grew up seeing cards and telly programmes telling me Xmas is in winter but in reality it makes no sense.
The first time I had a Xmas in the Northern hemisphere it was like visiting Disneyland. “Ohhhhhhh it is cold. Ohhh look snow. How weird is that!!” Cool but not real. Christmas means summer holidays.
Time zones are my new confusion. I was comfortable thinking everyone in the Northern Hemisphere was hours behind us (usually a day behind us).
Two days ago we got an English language student from Russia. He claimed that his city (Khabarovsk) was only a 2 hour time difference from NZ. BOLLOCKS! I said loudly. It seems he was right (though I still want to think it is yesterday there…even when I know it is not).
I don’t understand how NZ and AUS have a 2 hour time diference and they are are a 2 hour flight apart, yet Khabarovsk and NZ are at least a 12 hr flight apart and the time difference is the same.
I really don’t understand time differences it seems.
I still want him to be wrong.
ooooh sheeesh… that brings up another one. Do you guys down there in Oz go to school in the summer… er, scratch that, do things like elementary school run from, say, March to October? The norm over here is September through May.
I still cannot get my head around it. It’s just too weird.
The school year starts around the beginning of February, give or take a day. There are four terms ( like semesters). There is a six week holiday at the end of the year, starting mid-December, and throughout the year there are three two-week holidays.
That’s Australia (in fact, my home state of New South Wales, though I think the other states are similar). I don’t know about NZ.
The one thing that I cannot understand (and therefore it really freaks me out too) is that the universe is supposedly expanding. Into what? Is there an end to space, or is it the one truly infinite thing? If the universe stretches out too far will it snap like a rubber band? The whole concept scares the crap out me. That and the fact that some day the sun is supposed to burn out.
Corporations. So much mediocrity, inefficiency and lack of direction packed into some office space. I don’t know how they continue to exist and prosper.
You see, football is played on Sunday afternoon. Early games at 1:00 pm, late games at roughly 4:15, and one evening game at 8:00. That’s simply the way it is. It’s the only acceptable way.
And yet, I talk to lno about football, and he speaks of games starting at noon. Noon! What the hell?? There’s no football at noon! There’s pre-game at noon, but no actual games yet!
And apparently if you live on the west coast, you see football games at ten o’clock in the fricking morning! What kind of freakshow time zone are you living in that you see kickoff at 10:00 a.m.?!?
Yes, I understand the basis behind all this. It’s still…just…wrong.
Numbers. Who decided what the numbers were called and why? Why is a 6 a six? Why does four plus four make eight? Who said so and why did everyone agree? Numbers make me all befuddled.
Sleep. I dont get sleep. One second im awake at 11:30pm, then next thing I know its 8am in the morning!! One second im a thinking conscious person, then im not. Freaks me out, which is probably why have a hard time sleeping!!
