Things you crave but almost always disappoint when you get it

What is the thing or things that you really love but are almost always disappointed with when you get it? This doesn’t necessarily have to be about food.

Mine is beef jerky. I want it all the time, but it’s expensive and I’m too lazy to make my own, so I have to “treat” myself to a bag of Jack Link’s or Pemmican or whatever’s available at the store every now and then. Problem is, it’s almost always terrible. Rock hard, bone dry, way over/under seasoned, has a weird flavor, has an odd texture, the maker has added weird ingredients to it like dried cranberries-- no matter what there’s always inevitably something terribly wrong with it. Yet I keep buying it because I guess I’m looking for that one perfect bag that I’m never going to find.

Perfect bag of jerky: Hi-Country.

Odd flavored vodkas. I always buy them, then have to force myself to drink them. Cotton candy? Sweet Tea (I don’t like sweet tea to start with)?

The nut carts have these incredibly delicious smelling honey nuts freshly made right in front of you. Alas, the taste always disappoints.

May I suggest a solution to your pemmican problem or jaundiced jerky juxtaposition?


These little smoked and dried German sausages are guaranteed satisfying for that kind of carnivore craving. They are what a Slim Jim should be and what good jerky aspires to.

I don’t know about DC, but here in the midwest many local Butchers make them in store and they are comparable in price to a jumbo commercial jerky.

Yeah, smells can often be deceptive. Whenever I go to the county fair, I’m always seduced by the spicy, sweet aroma of polish sausages on the grill. But when I get one, they’re invariably too greasy, have kind of a rubbery texture and give me stomach pains.

Never had Hi-Country, but Damn Good is damn good.

Believe it or not, pizza.

It is only very rarely that a pizza I’m eating tastes as good as what I wanted an hour ago when I ordered it.

Thanks for the suggestions. The main problem here is Jack Links, Pemmican, or lately Wild Ride are the only brands that are generally available at most stores, and most stores only sell 1 brand. There’s no such thing as a local butcher; probably hasn’t been such a thing for a good 60 years.

It’s a great question, but has a complex answer.

I hate it when I am thinking about my ideal version but only the regular version is available -

  • I wanna see a Big Dumb Action movie like Die Hard or even Predator, but the latest release doesn’t come close

  • I want either great fast food french fries or real steak fries and I have to go with the local burger joint’s limp, unsalted dreck in my to-go order

  • I want cole slaw and the only thing available…isn’t home-made cole slaw. What’s up with cole slaw? Why are store/restaurant cole slaw and home-made slaw *completely different categories *of food??

  • I want artificial banana flavoring and the only thing available is real banana. Or vice versa…:wink:

A lot of bottled imported beer (especially European or Asian) never tastes quite “right” when consumed here in the USA. (draught beer is usually OK, depending on the specific brand)

Of course I know that it is never going to be as good as when you are actually at the fountainhead (Prague, Brussels, Berlin) but pilsners and lagers just don’t seem to travel in glass very well (in both green and brown bottles) and it’s always a disappointment to spend 3 times the price of domestic brew for a 6-pack of Spaten or Staropramen, only to have the beer infused with that “off” or stale aftertaste that is so common with imports.

I guess that’s why buying American (or Canadian) beer here at home has become my default move, even when I get the craving for a good Czech or German pils.

Vacation time.

Hostess Donettes. In my mind, they are amazing. In reality, they are…always slightly stale. Sigh.

Leeann Chin’s, I get a craving for it once a month but it’s greasy, usually old and always overheated in a warming lamp.

Hot dogs or chili dogs.

Most of the time just the concept makes me queasy. But one in a great while, I get a craving for one. It is almost never as good as imagined and often makes a bit ill to boot.

Great, now I want a damn hotdog.

Any clothes I order through mail order (catalogs, I hate going out shopping but I found it’s better than having to schlepp to the post office and pay return shipping.

You shut your mouth about my Firefly vodka!

I totally agree with the “action movies” thing - never quite satisfying, is it?

Corn dogs. My mental corn dog is less… variety-meaty than the ones at the State Fair, I think.

I was going to say this.

I grew up in a small town with two or three little mon’n’pop diners that always had GREAT hot dogs. Now whenever I get a craving, I’ll find somewhere selling hot dogs, but they always fall short of the ones I had growing up.

Steamed buns are a lost art, for one thing.

I agree. They look so yummy in their little plastic wrapper, and you expect them to taste chocolaty and delicious. Once you open them, they taste rather plastic-y and artificial - you might as well eat the wrapper. :rolleyes:

For me it’s the Ice Blended from Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf. They look so tempting in the store, but once I actually taste them, they’re never as delicious as they look. I guess I prefer Frappucinos, if I’m going to get a cold drink from a major coffee chain.

I know, I guess there just never will be another Die Hard or original Terminator… can’t ever go back home. Although the recently released on DVD movie “Red” was fairly good and a pleasant surprise. Certainly better than most of the rehashed genre.