No such ambiguity on the highway the other day. I was stuck behind a left lane hog as he went to pass the semi in the right lane at a speed differential of .0000001 MPH. A guy in a pickup comes up behind me and starts flashing his highbeams at me. Last I checked my car wasn’t invisible (thus only I could see the flashes). Yeah, even if I get out of your way Jack, you’ll still have to deal with the bozo that was in front of me.
Of course, as soon as I was clear of the semi (the hog natcherally couldn’t be arsed to move right) I zipped around the hog and left them all in my dust.
It’s funny (not really) how some people assume that the only reason anyone could possibly be reading alone in the middle of the day is because they’re bored and they would much rather have someone to talk to.
This. I found a neato tray that I could put on my steering wheel so I could prop my book up and eat lunch in my car. My car was also equipped with the darkest tinting possible and a sunscreen on the windshield. Even then, every so often, someone noticed me and wanted to talk about last night’s TV show that I never watch because I’m fucking reading.
Another handy use for my noise-cancelling headphones. They cut most noise even without being plugged into anything, and they’re huge cans. So they proclaim “THIS person canNOT hear you. Why even try?”
I’ll bet you could find cheap cans… [research happens] …oh, wow, you can get Foldable Wireless Cans for $17!
Or LED Light Up Headphones - “Unicorn and Cat” (NOT “Unicorn OR Cat”, AND!) for five bucks! Bonus: the cat ears and unicorn horn will repel everyone (except Mystical Witchy Furries, and their numbers are low).
You come up behind someone (driving in the left lane) that you want to pass and you flash your headlamps or blow your horn. The rule of the road (as published in my state’s driver education pamphlet) is that they must move over - when it is safe to do so. Emphasize when it is safe to do so. Don’t expect them to risk an accident for your sake.
City driving: The traffic light has turned green and you’ve made your left or right turn. If the traffic lights have been synchronized to allow for continuous flow of cross traffic - YOU are now out of sync. You will likely be stopped at the next traffic light. Plan for it.
If you have just gotten out on the road and you notice that everyone else is driving VERY cautiously, there IS a a reason.
Somewhat related to this: cruise control is not a “set it and forget it” kind of thing. If you are driving on the highway with your cruise control on, and are in the left lane because you are going 1 mph faster than the car next to you, and faster traffic is coming up behind you, it’s OK to step on the gas so that you can complete your pass and get over.
(I guess this falls under the category of “things you shouldn’t need to tell people, because they should have learned it in Driver’s Ed.”)
I think you’re exactly right. My guess is that these are people who never learned to read for pleasure. I suspect that, in their minds, reading is what Ms. Othmar in high school English class made them do, when they were forced to wade through The Scarlet Letter and The Old Man and the Sea.
So clearly, if you’re sitting alone reading, it’s because there is nothing else more fun to do; so they’re doing you a favor, rescuing you from boredom so severe that you actually had to read a book, you poor slob.
B-b-b-but what if they have a bet with their neighbor/uncle/friend at work that they can drive all the way from Chicago to Florida on cruise without ever touching any of the pedals??? There’s a lot of money at stake!
I used to treat myself to lunch before doing my grocery shopping and other errands. I almost always went to the same restaurant that was generally quiet in the early afternoon, and I always had a book with me. The wait staff understood, but the effing manager would ALWAYS come by to ‘check on me’. And he’s always try to start a conversation about what I was reading - was it good, what’s it about, so you like reading, etc.
I’d glance up at him, say I was fine, and then mostly ignore him. He never quite got the message, alas …
Or it may be an introvert/extrovert thing: what looks to an introvert like a person enjoying some alone time recharging their batteries, looks to an extrovert like a missed opportunity for human interaction.
If you buy any livestock that will fit in the back of your car, that doesn’t mean you should put it there for the long drive home. No, not even on a blanket.
If you open a gate, CLOSE IT behind you. If you go through an open gate LEAVE IT OPEN.
Don’t pet farm dogs unless they come up wagging to be petted. Most of them won’t.
In fact, if any dog anywhere is avoiding you, don’t pursue it squatting and reaching and cooing. It’s not your fucking dog and it doesn’t want to have anything to do with you. Keep doing that and you’ll eventually be bitten in the face, and richly deserve it.
I got the idea from a woman I worked with, who’d do plein aire painting on her days off. She’d be pulled off the road, with her car forty feet down a dirt path with her easel out, concentrating… and HI! WHAT’RE YOU PAINTING? OH, THAT TREE? LOOKS PRETTY! Yes, nosy people would pull off the highway and trudge over to comment.
She noticed some huge headphones at Goodwill and just put the cord in her jacket pocket. No more gawkers.
I had a dog who would bite people in the face because they wouldn’t listen to him or to me. Guess who gets punished (killed) if some asshole thinks all dogs are their googoo baby and won’t take no, won’t even take me standing in front of my dog and saying no, for an answer.
What wouldYOU do if a complete stranger cornered you and shoved their face in your face?
That might be a post for the “Benign Things That Make You Seethe” thread; I hate when people ask, “Whaddya reading?” There’s no good answer to that question. “A book” sounds flippant and sarcastic; but the questioner doesn’t want a five-minute précis of the novel I’m enjoying, either.
Jacopo Belbo, in Foucault’s Pendulum, had a good answer for the question: “Oh, a study of 16th century Arab metaphysics.” That shut down that line of questioning.
I used to work with a woman who was well known for walking into the break room, seeing you sitting there reading, and would say “Oh, reading a book?” Not “what are you reading?” or “how is it?”, just observing that yes, you are in fact reading a book. We used to call her “The Master of the Obvious”.
