Or, tell me about your (almost) completely useless talents. For example, many years ago I had the good fortune of meeting a young woman who was able to, at will, roll a quarter down her nose where it would bounce off a table and into a shotglass. Or, for another example, my sister can, at will, ejaculate a little stream of water from under her tongue. I do this, unintentionally, from time to time, but she has mastered it. I don’t know why.
So what embarassing or ridiculous thing can you do, or have you done, that you’d most likely never mention to a future employer?
I have a lot of experience with plumbing from when I used to work for my Dad’s sprinkler company. It’s not as if this really helps me at all in the advertising business, which I’ve been in for 10 years. I used to tell prospective employers about my plumbing experience just for giggles, but I’ve stopped mentioning it because once people found out about it, all of a sudden I’d become the go-to guy when the toilets got plugged up in the office. I’d also get calls at night from co-workers who wondered whether I’d mind coming over with my toolbox because a water line broke in their house and they couldn’t get a plumber to come over on an emergency call.
I can get any non-cooperative office machine to work again. Fax machines, printers, vacuum cleaners, air-conditioner compressers … mine, mine, mine. Copiers are a particular talent. I speak Ricoh’s language. I can coax out any jam, replace any toner. The boys stand around helplessly. They say things like, “Pretty good, for a girl.” … I then swear the onlookers to secrecy, for fear that I’ll be issued a Nextel so every floor can broadcast its troubles to FixItGirl.
Because of a college work-study job, I’m very good at figuring out problems with any non-computer A/V equipment; the same job gave me skills as a movie projectionist. I also have a fair chunk of the dewey decimal system memorized (basically, the parts that have books that got checked out a lot). None of these skills are useful in my current job as a project manager.