The Fella came from a very blue collar background. He is the first in his family to graduate from college. He lives fairly modestly, but gives generously of both his time and material resources, many times anonomously. For example, not only did he help a son through college and is currently helping another, he’s also helping a sister in her return to higher education. He has sponsored a Pre-K child who otherwise wouldn’t qualify for governmental aid but still in need of financial assistance to attend a decent program annually for several years. He sponsors community projects and does considerable volunteer work. All this and he still has time for me and his family.
I give, but I’m a bit more stingy with both time and money.
My SO catches a lot of flak since I am the really outgoing, affectionate one, so most people assume he is a grump. And he can be, but he can fix anything, do really complicated mathe equations in his head and has gotten me to a point that I have to be careful what I say I want (material items) because he will work himself to the bone to get it for me.
I was just skimming this thread, but that caught my eye. Please tell me this wasn’t a typo for “toilet case” or “toilet seat” and that you really sewed a toilet back together. In which case, of course, we demand details!
He has lots of talents and abilities that impress me but I think the most amazing thing is that he provides me with unwavering support in everything no matter what. There is nothing I could ask of him that he wouldn’t provide and nothing I could do that he wouldn’t be completely behind my choice.
I decided I wanted to be a stay at home mom and he was behind me 100% without a moment’s hesitation. I decided I want to start my own business and he didn’t even question me, just asked if we have enough in savings to cover start up costs or if he needs to get a second job so I can make my dream happen. When I was pregnant and dealing with sciatica I could wake him up in the middle of the night to massage my sore spots and he did it with a smile. When I told him I hated pregnancy with the fire of 1,000 suns and never wanted to go through it again he didn’t once mention how we would feel about never having more kids in the future or anything, he just asked if I would rather get my tubes tied or if I wanted him to get a vasectomy. When I mentioned the possibility of perhaps moving to another country someday he jumped right on board with my plan without even asking which country I had in mind.
I’ve never met anyone else who would give of themselves this way. And the best part is he feels like he is getting the better end of the deal in this relationship when I obviously found the very best guy in the world to marry me.
He will help me at any time when I have a migraine. When I have to wake him up at 4 a.m. to help me take a shot. When I have to throw up he is instantly there, even if he was soundly asleep, and he gets the cotton balls and alcohol and bandaids out of the cabinet so I won’t have to. He loads up the dose for me and holds my hand when the needle hurts. And tells me to wake him up again if I need to.
How could I forget the most important thing? His wit. I crushed on him way back when because of his biting wit, and it still has the ability to reduce me to helpless tears of laughter. It’s razor-sharp, pointed, and really fucking funny.
I could mention lots of stuff here. He’s patient. he’s generous. he’s wicked smart. But I think it’s his understanding and total acceptance of me as a person that impresses me the most. At the risk of cliche, he…gets me.
The speed at which her brains work. A situation can come up that we’re both equally familiar with and the solution just comes to her. I can usually get to the same place, but I have to mull, and ‘not think’ about it for a couple days.
Related to this: her patience with me for being so slow.
I could be super-gooshy, cause he’s pretty darn amazing just in general, but the one thing that really really gets me is that he can whistle and hum at the same time.
It sounds like a bad sci-fi- made for tv spaceship, or a demented theremin.
He’s also totally tone-deaf, so it’s even more amusing.
I have tried, and tried, and our friends and families have tried and tried, and we can’t do it. He just… whums away happily. It’s the coolest thing ever.
He is a really good helicopter pilot - recently he safely landed without jarring the patient in back after a birdstrike took out his windshield 1000 feet over pitch-black North Dakota in the middle of the night.
He has an amazing memory - he can hear someothing once or twice and remember it weeks later. He has made good use of this performing Shakespeare and Moliere.
And every once in a while he’ll tell me that he thinks I’m too good for him - and he’ll say it with a straight face. Bwahh haa.
She has sex with me, yey.
She never forgets a name, a place, a situation, anything.
She’s always thinkng of 100 things.
However she never remebers simple computing stuff like attaching, finding files, calling files “files” and not “icons”, the difference between “file” and “folder”, etc; the freaking basic basic stuff.
He remembers people - names, faces, details. If he sat next to you once on a commuter flight for an hour, 20 years ago, he will remember you. It might take a minute for him to dredge up the association, but he will remember you and ask about whatever you conversed about on that flight. I, on the other hand, call my own children by nicknames because I can’t recall the names I personally chose for them half the time.
His job: I could not survive a week in law enforcement, but he has done it for two decades. That doesn’t sound like a huge accomplishment, but he has done it for two decades without becoming a power-hungry control freak, a politician, or (much) of a cynic. His calls might be anything from a donkey on the loose and in the middle of a rural road in the middle of the night to an armed crackhead to a car wreck involving people he knows, and he handles them with resourcefulness and compassion (when needed) and the kind of calm impartiality I’d never be able to exhibit. (And he’s not a robot - the emotion comes later, and some calls are terrible and haunt him, but he somehow keeps his cool until later.)
And on his own time, I’m amazed at his ability to show his emotions. It no longer surprises me when my rough, tough, manly husband gets teary-eyed over the sight of his baby girls sleeping, or when he grabs me by the waist while I’m cooking dinner and tells me that he’s the luckiest man on earth, or when his heart breaks over the older kids’ teenage insecurities and tribulations.
