You will find, being a married guy, that when you walk into certain types of situations with your spouse that people make assumptions about who is the expert on certain subjects.
Apparently of the two of us I am supposed to know more about computers. This is laughable. Mrs. Lagomorph worked for several years with complex database applications, she set up a network for someone’s home office, and in general is far more comfortable with both hardware and software than I am. I am lucky I can turn the damn things on, and thankful we have good tech support at my job.
I am also apparently supposed to know more about buying cars. I have actually never bought a car by myself in my life and I would probably get royally ripped off if I did. Mrs. Lagomorph’s father has run a driving school for years and she has helped him buy and sell several of his vehicles. She also knows way more about car mechanics than me.
Finally, financial matters. Mrs. Lagomorph has a degree in business and worked for about a decade in financial services. Before I met her I was lucky if I balanced my checkbook and I have gladly turned all the family finances over to her. Still, brokers and financial advisors always make their pitches to me, ignoring her (at their great peril, I might add).
She also is a much better skiier than me. When we go skiing with other couples she goes off skiing with the other men, and I end up skiing with the other women.
The one thing she truly excels at is dealing with people. It is always a struggle for me, whereas she has a bubbly outgoing personality that immediately puts people at their ease. This serves her well when she is doing fundraising for the various nonprofit entities she is involved with. To be blunt, I couldn’t do what she does for them.
There are a couple of things I am better at than her. I am a much better cook, I think she would agree. I am far more comfortable with anything science or math related (other than computers or finance). My knowledge of popular culture like movies, music or TV dwarfs hers.
Anyway, let’s give spouses and SOs their due. What are they far better at than you?
He can draw much better than I, I am a competent draftsman, but he can draw a tree that actually looks like a tree…mine looks like it should be on the wall in a kindergarden=(
I didn’t know this when we married, was surprised the first time I took her to the range. No training, no real interest in guns. But, at the pistol range, she gets invites to join leagues (I don’t)
I don’t even want to talk about the skeet/trap/barbecue affair we attended last summer. (Example: “Oooh, what a pretty gun… And it’s named after my favorite TV detective!” Then proceeds to make us guys look like beginners).
Mrs Geek has significantly better social skills than I do (of course, me being an engineer, what do you expect). I’m sure any of you who met us at the PA dope fest would agree.
She’s more emotional, I’m more logical. Together we balance each other out.
I’m supposed to be the computer-geeky one. My husband has a degree in English, I am the Scientist, damn it. I’m supposed to have the logical, problem-solving, trouble-shooting mind. And I do okay in Unix (including OS X, thanksverymuch) But I. Cannot. Cope. With. Windows. I’m okay if I’m just typity-typing along, but if anything goes wrong, I am utterly hopeless. Installing software? Forget about it. Having me within 5 feet of the computer during hardware installation will lead to instant malfunction. The hubby, calmy offering advice, sez try this. What are you talking about, I say, that’s never going to work; there is no logical reason why that would ever work; you fool, you have no idea what you are talking about. Then, after thrashing around uselessly for a half hour, I try that, and of course it works.
He also has an amazing eye for color. I don’t go shopping for fabric or yarn without him. I can give him a skein, and he can look at a huge display and zero in instantly on the perfect complimentary color. I can’t wait to buy a house and decorate it with him.
And, jeepers, I almost forgot the reason I married the guy. He’s the best game master in the world. I’ve tried running RPGs, but I’m miserable at it. I just don’t know where to concentrate my effort; I get bogged down in all the wrong details, and I can’t improvise with squat. But he steers a game with effortless mastery. Listen to me gamer ladies: find the best GM you can, and marry him.
Er, that last line come out kind of sexist, but I was just coming from my personal experience there. This is better: Gamers, find the best GM you can of the sex to which you personally are attracted and marry that person.
Mine knows reams of information about musical equipment and sound mixing. He can have a 4 hour phone conversation about the proper way to set up a recording studio. Its part of a total-immersion plan he developed when he was 14.
He can also do handy things like fix wierd, what-the-hell-is-that-noise problems in our vehicles, thus saving us mucho dinero.
He is also much, much, much better at keeping his temper than I. In fact, he is the calmest human being I have ever met. I also tell him I married him because he’s a better person than I, and in fact he is an exemplary human being.
However, I can do two things better than he:
Cook
Anything involving the computer
…which puts me back on equal footing, at least in this house.
My mister has an immense capacity and desire for learning from books. This is something I lack (particularly the desire). He knows far more about history (world and U.S.) and computers than anyone else I know.
He reads incredibly fast. He is far more logical and analytical than I am. He thinks before he talks (something I mean to do, but can’t seem to remember until it’s too late). Little kids think he’s the cat’s PJ’s. He can drink coffee late at night and still sleep like a rock. He hardly ever raises his voice. He doesn’t spend money like it’s going out of style the way I do.
I’m better than he is at some things, but I’ll let him tell you about it if he wants.
Stonebow is a master omelet maker. I can scramble eggs, fry eggs, poach eggs, make scotch eggs, Eggs Benedict, quiche, etc. I am totally incapable of making an omelet, though. :: shrug :: I just can’t do it.
shE. Thorp has a much better memory than I have…from books she read as a child to, uh, whatever it was we were talking about yesterday. In a related talent, her research talents easily dwarf mine. She is also an excellent cook.
Math. He can multiply and divide large numbers in his head-- numbers so large that I would need a pen and paper to add them.
Putting stuff together. I get easily frustrated with this.
Cooking. I can’t boil water without burning it.
Bathing the dog. When I used to do it, I had to wrestle the dog into the stub and have an assistant hold her in place while I bathed her. Through bribery and coaxing, he has actually gotten her to the point where she will climb into the tub on her own when he says “Bath time,” and remain until he’s finished.
Interior decoration. He knows how to balance a room and coordinate colors properly, concepts which were utterly foreign to me. (I used to put stuff wherever it fit, and bought it because I liked it, not because it matched the sofa.) He’s made our home look so much nicer.
Patience. I envy him for this. I have a tendancy to want to fly off the handle. He’s able to look at things more rationally-- and smart enough not to inform me of that fact at the moment!
Huh, I am suddenly stumped as to where my strengths lie. As for my hubby’s, though…
My husband is better at:
Computer stuff
Cooking (although I am not as bad or as unwilling as I think he assumes I am. He just loves to do it and is great at it, so I leave it to him, but I did actually eat before I met him.)
Buying stuff. I think he has the better sense of what large pruchases should cost and staying within those parameters.
Staying cool in times of stress. Like Lissa’s husband, he has a lot more patience than I do. From stories he has told me, it seems like he was a fairly impulsive teenager, too, so that should give hope to parents of impulisive teenagers.
I’m sure there are other things as well. This is a nice thread, BTW. Good chance to remind ourselves of all those things we appreciate about our SOs and spouses.
Dave is a great cook. I let him be. I’m the baker.
He’s got an encyclopedic knowledge of American (and world) military history. I, being Canadian, really don’t have a need for that knowledge.
He’s a fantastic salesman, and enjoys it. I hate sales with a passion, even though I did it for many years.
He’s got this built-in compass that never ceases to amaze me. He can navigate any city we’ve ever been to (except Edmonton, for some reason), even if he’s never been there before.
mrsmartini is an engineer. He has the amazing capacity to fold clothes so that like items are exactly the same size on the first try . My linen closet is the neatest room in the house. It puts a department store display to shame.
He once folded all of my clothes during a period of time when I was sick. He folded panty hose. Not rolled into a ball, either. Folded. He is a competitive sailor and has a lot of sailing t-shirts. They are in their own drawer folded so they fit in one layer with the identification marking of the shirt facing up.
He definately folds better than me.
Just so you don’t think he is too weird, he balances all that out by having a room downstairs for his sailing gear wwhich you enter at your own risk.
:eek:
