It itches and adds around 2 degrees to the perceived temperature.
I had to google her name to find out who she was and what she looks like. (What can I say? I avoid celebrity culture like sandworms avoid water.) I’ve seen worse. But the picture I remember was part of an article about how she’s been voted Most Unsexy Woman* by some magazine or other, so of course they chose an unflattering picture.
[sub]*Obviously, this is the Hollywood version of “most unsexy”, not the real-world version. I recall seeing a horrendously-ugly woman on the subway in Toronto, who actually scared me.[/sub]
I think I might have a clue there. I was looking at my leg muscles today, and I suddenly thought, “You know? It wouldn’t take that much more effort to start on the whole body-sculpture road, and shaving my legs, and all that. Just take care of my gut…” Then I paused and thought, “Naaah. I’m not that obsessed with external appearance. I like my munchies too much.”
No cite but last year a report came out about the rise in infections on peoples arses caused by thongs getting right up the persons ringpiece aided and abetted by sweat and spreading bacteria from the anus over the cheeks.
Unless you’ve had a bath or shower since your last crap it is not 100%clean if you’ve just used toilet paper even though you cant see anything,thongs?A total turn off.
Tattoos have always been a mans thing used to emphasise their toughness/muscles.
Even if a woman has a supposedly cute little rose or similar its still at best not much of a turn off but useually its much more so.
A bit like a woman having a cute little moustache,but most men desiring to evade a premature death will not even under torture tell their women that.EVER!
Big hair
Non ear piercings
Over large tits.
“Cut” muscles. Apparently I’m supposed to find that deadly sexy, but I just find it intimidating and scary. Muscles can be fun, but I like the ones that have, you know, skin over them. Gentle rolling hills rather than rifts and escarpments, if you follow.
Machismo.
The ability to consume large quantities of alcohol and/or drugs and remain standing, if not exactly conscious.
George Clooney
The Nerd. A lot of the media tell us that nerds are in and hot, I don’t get it.
Cars. If it runs and it is clean, I don’t care what a guy drives. I’m not impressed with vehicles.
BTW, all the ladies who don’t like the muscles and want the pudgy, you can send those muscle men my way. I don’t like them bodybuilder sized with veins popping, that’s gross. I like them more like this (safe for work)
I’ve found that the combination of female+drunk+horny that is so popular in teen sex comedies has a less-than-arousing effect in real life. THE 40-YEAR-OLD VIRGIN scene of the girl who ate too many seafood sandwiches- I WAS ALMOST ENGAGED TO THAT GIRL!
Aww heck, that’s ME! Course I’ve got more grey hair…and a receding hairline…and that photo neatly crops my beer gut…and my wedding band. 
I could have sworn I had posted in this thread, but can’t find it.
Most of my thoughts have been expressed here already. Just for the record:
I don’t find nudity exciting–see the post upthread. I much prefer the glimpse of a man’s wrists as he shoots his cuffs or the angle of his collar bone as it meets his shoulder etc. Hands are incredibly sexy to me (well, some hands).
Frilly anything (lace is itchy), thong anything,tons of makeup, stilettos, garters, fish net hose, “look at me, I’m a hot sexy mama” type outfits–ugh. I won’t wear them; don’t want to see them. I’ve always been an oversized T shirt or boxer/T shirt kind of girl. Nice to know that some guys here 'preciate that look.
Tattoos. Ugh. Maybe a very small one, discreetly placed. Let me put it this way: no one’s attractiveness is enhanced by a tattoo, IMO.
Ripped men–as in body builders. Makes me nauseated. I not only don’t find it sexy, I find it actively repulsive. Ditto for female body builders. It’s just gross. I prefer men long and lean (think Rob Petrie/ Dick van Dyke), but with some muscle tone. I want to know you can get the top off the jar, not crush the jar with your teeth kind of thing…
Porn=not sexy to me. I found the movie, “Age of Innocence” incredibly erotic. Debbie Doing Everyone does nothing for me. Actually, I’d rather be having sex than watching it, so why watch?
Rude behavior/sexist or racist jokes/boorishness in public/bathroom humor anywhere=getting kicked to the curb. Now, if you want to pretend your Stanley Kowalski and I’m Blanche (or Stella–I’m not picky) in private–I’m yours, baby (especially if you know who Stan and Blanche are!).
You are a wise man, DigitalC. It is always wise to compare claims made on the Dope with reality.
I like a LOT of the things that are being called unattractive in this thread: strip clubs (I suspect because when I’ve gone, I’ve gone just to watch naked women dance, not in a search for companionship or anything of that nature) nipple ring and shaved labia. (The reason shaved labia appeal to me is that I like the way vaginas look and hair makes them look kinda dirty and unhygeinic. Shaved labia look clean.)
But I don’t like tongue studs for the reasons given, and I find girl-girl porn unappealing (there’s just a certain dynamic there when it’s male female that’s lacking with girl-girl) so I posted about that, because that’s what the OP asked for. I suspect that if you were to ask the Dopers who have been giving examples of what they don’t like to also give examples of what they like, you’d get a more balanced response.
Shaved labia look not just clean, but sterilized.
I decry the trend - which is nothing more, BTW - with a heavy heart. The south shall rise again.
One thing from pr0n and from allegedly “classy” no-really-this-is-not-pr0n-honest “erotica”: Oil. As in, pouring it or rubbing it onto the body. Sorry, to me this is something you do to combat overly-dry skin, there’s no erotic charge to it. When the scene comes where we’re supposed to think “oh, how wonderful, A is rubbing oil all over B (or all over him/erself)” all I can think of is “how can they stand themselves and not run for scrubbing soap?? and that oil all over everything! do they do laundry twice a day?” I suppose having grown up with oily-skin issues does that to you…
OK, also the archetypal “modern pornstar” is way too over the edge for me. I don’t mind the depilatory thing at all but the ridiculously obvious bolt-on boobs and lips are just distracting.
Tats and piercings I’m just neutral about, it depends on whom and how well done.
Oh, and Elisabeth Hasselbeck. Stepford-sex. Yecch.
She might be functionally pretty if she didn’t have that vacant shallow/hollow look about her like something was missing / not home. She’s like a marionette dressed at Talbots. Sadly, the effect isn’t dispelled when she opens her mouth…
It’s amazing what they can do with Photoshop, huh? 
I think I find most of the usual things sexy in a man, so the best thing I can come up with for this thread is blue eyes.
What’s the appeal? It makes you look like your head is full of sky. I like extremely dark eyes.
Hairy chests. Ick ick ick. Ivylad has a nice smooth, hairless chest…mmmmm.
I’m also not one for the scruffy, unshaven look. Clean shaven is the look for me!
Large breasts.
Women posing with lollipops/suckers. It looks juvenile and demeaning. I see that too often and it emphasizes the whole airhead image, which is not how I want to see women. Give me a woman who can hold her own in an intelligent conversation. I do enjoy the incongruity, though, if she can speak with glowing intelligence…in valley girl speak. 
Pornography and strip clubs. This also goes for Girls Gone Wild. I have no objection to other guys partaking, but for me, I can’t get passed the fact that all of this stuff seems to only exist for the sexual gratification of heterosexual men. It makes me feel like a sleaze, but I do realize that other guys don’t have those hang-ups, so I’M NOT JUDGING ANYONE.
Sorry for shouting, but I find that I often have to defend my turn-offs.
The porn “kiss”. You know, the one where the two people involved are supposed to be kissing, except what they’re actually doing is licking each other’s extended tongues, while their lips never touch. Why not just have the “actress” come right out and say, “Sorry, I gotta save something for my boyfriend”? I suppose the idea behind these “kisses” is to make it more appealing to women viewers by showing that the characters having sex are a “couple” (as opposed to a random hookup). Instead it simply looks ridiculous.
Another vote for huge, especially huge fake tits and bleach-blond hair. I’m also another one who doesn’t get the appeal of oiled-up women.
While I don’t mind tastefully done tattoos on women, I can’t stand “tramp stamps”. Mainly because I’m an “ass man”, and I despise the way the tramp stamp completely disrupts the otherwise appealing appearance of the lower back gently curving into a luscious behind.
I do like shaved genitalia, and I resent the implication (which I’ve seen repeated numerous times on the SDMB) that there’s something “vaguely pedophilic” about liking it. I wish one of the ladies here would have pointed this out so that I wouldn’t have to, but the shaved genitalia of an adult woman looks quite different from the bald genitalia of a little girl, and liking the first does not automatically correlate with liking the second.
D’oh! I knew I forgot something in my post. I was going to (from a woman’s perspective) address this.
I have been shaving it all away since I was about 17. A couple of times I decided to let it grow and just hated the way it felt. About 3 years ago, I had it lasered off. So far, no regrets. I’m now 33.
One of my friends asked me if it bothered me that it would make me “borderline fetish material” for pedophiles. I don’t get this and have to wonder about the sexual hangups of people who believe this.
I didn’t do it for men, I did it for me. It feels cleaner and better to me. To each their own, but I don’t get the pedophile comments.
S’truth. Plain cotton undies thin enough so you get a hint of the goods underneath work just fine for me.
And speaking of goods underneath, bald = good; (more or less) natural = good; landing strip = yech.