I’m tired of talking about things that matter. The Dope needs another silly Skald thread.
What things do you oppose intellectually, and yet find incredibly, horribly, distastefully sexy? When I say “distasteful,” by the way, I don’t mean distasteful to the world in general, or even necessarily to your significant other. I mean things that you YOURSELF disapprove of, despite their arousal factor to you?
I’ll name a minor one of my own: women smoking. Og, but it makes me hot.
Ooo. Guys smoking for me. Especially skinny foul-mouthed guys like Denis Leary or Spider Jerusalem.
Oh, and my guilty lust: The Joker. Yes, I’m totally in lust with a fictional psychopathic maniac with a fictional deathcount into the four-digits. I read Joker/Harley fic and am totally jealous of Harley. I suppose part of that has to do with the authors.
Weird confession alert! Striped people (like, painted or fictional or whatever) Or tigers. Or, really, large cats in generally. It’s that furry thing.
My bosses daughter.
She is of legal age, btw.But the age diffence is 17 years,I’m 39.(thing is, I think she likes me too) been a struggle to keep it in my pants.
Billy Bob Thornton. I’m a sick person.
I hear that. There’s an 18 year old hottie who’s a host at the restaurant I work at. I know she wants me, too…she’s said as much. But hells no! WAY too young for me. I give myself a cut-off of 21…maybe 20 if they are close to 21, but that’s it.
That’s about the difference between me and my wife. When I thought about first asking her out, we had a discussion on this board on the issue; as I recall, the consensus was that I was being a moron and should just do it.
On the other hand, it’s your boss’s daughter. Stay away until that changes.
When it comes to dating younger women, I always figured the formula to avoid creepiness is to divide your age in half and then add seven, to get the youngest possible age. I’m 30, so I wouldn’t date younger than 23, not that it’s an issue for me.
I don’t like the idea of cheating or adultery, and I would never actually pursue it, but dear god do I find married men sexy. Particularly men wearing wedding rings. Grrrr
I’ve another one…
the word "Sir.’ When my wife calls me that (or its dark cousin I won’t mention because I’m a jerk), it means three things:
Gives new meaning to “Thank you, sir, may I have another?”
Over-muscled, grunty, sweaty, Leonidas-like men in loincloths.
I like lanky intellectuals (of which my S.O. is an awesome specimen). I view the muscly, tanned Adonis-type with disgust. However, my ovaries think they’re GREAT! It creates much confusion.
Football (as in soccer) kit. I hate football and think it’s the opiate of the masses, and would quite happily so it cease to exist… except that if it did there’d no longer be a football kit fetish scene nor indeed huge slews of pictures daily of professional footballers in kit which for me qualifies as soft porn.
Women wearing hats. Thank goodness the 1950s are long gone and Debbie Gibson no longer cuts albums.
Police officers. Especially young ones, but even ones my age. Their outfits are very well pulled together.
Fat, I guess. I don’t want to be fat, but fat chicks are hot. I’m surprised no-one else has mentioned this yet.
The acronym is “fafcam” = “fit as fuck, common as muck”.
Women swearing, especially when they say the dreaded c word.
That.
Great sweaty brutes of manmeat. Make me quiver with simultaneous disgust and lust. Nom nom nom.
My God, that’s right! I hadn’t put it together that she was your wife! Rock on!
Short women. I know that the tall Barbie Doll type of woman is what we’re supposed to lust after, but give me a sexy little shrimp any day.
I love that I can rest my chin on my girfriend’s head.
