Tonight we will learn a wonderful lesson about hats. God doesn’t love you when you wear a hat. God hates people who wear hats, especially if they wear a hat in His house. If you wear a hat in God’s house, you are going to die a horrible stinking death and burn in Hell for all eternity. God is funny like that. It doesn’t matter whether God is in your heart, and you give your life to Him. The hat’s the thing. Especially if you wear a cap, and wear it backwards. That really pisses God off. People who wear caps backwards in God’s house are going to get tiny critters in their naughty bits and all their friends won’t want to be their friends anymore. Then they are going to die a horrible stinking death and be tortured by multitudes of demons wearing hats while burning in Hell.
Do you know what, boys and girls? Do you remember the Ten Commandments? They only apply to you if you wear a hat. You can kill as many people as you want, as long as you don’t wear a hat while you’re doing it. That’s why all the soldiers in wars are going to die a horrible stinking death and burn in Hell, because they were wearing helmets while they shoot people. Take the Lord’s name in vain, ignore the sabbath, covet anything you want, unless it happens to be somebody’s hat, it doesn’t count unless you’re wearing a hat.
If your parents ever wore a hat in church, even without thinking, they are going to die a horrible stinking death and burn in Hell and you will never ever see them again. Remember when your wonderful, kind, Godly grandmother wore a hat to church on Easter Sunday? She’s damned for all eternity now. Just because she wore a hat to church.
FWIW, I don’t think that boys or men wearing hats in church is frowned upon because it’s supposedly disrespectful to God specifically - it’s because boys/men are not supposed to wear hats indoors. Not inside a church or a grocery store or an office. It is just considered bad manners.
Did anyone see the episode of The Sopranos when Tony almost beat a guy up for leaving his baseball cap on while inside a restaurant? A little overboard, but same concept.
And the rule doesn’t apply to women - they can wear hats indoors anytime. Except at night, of course, when they should be wearing flowers, jewels, or little lacy things that can’t properly be called hats.
Having been in many different types of churchs, and experiencing a variety of religions I feel this may help you with a reasonable choice of action. Of course your minister is the best resource for avoiding futher conflict on exceptable wear in the room of worship. In most cases a minister will always incourage practices (standards of course) that help children become more interested, and raise their enthusiasm in church. Children need a good caring teacher to help them in all areas of their life. Don’t get discouraged, what you do for them stays with them forever.
Hee hee . . . this reminded me of a poster I saw the other day, when Leigh-Anne and I were walking through Alexandria. The poster showed nothing but a long robe and a pair of sandals, and it said, “Dress casual for church. Jesus did.”
I want to say at the start that I am out of my league here - I don’t know anything about VBS or Church politics.
That said, I can offer thoughts as a teacher.
I taught English and Drama at a Yeshiva High School - As you might imagine, from time to time (or “tome to tome?” YUCK!) I caused controversey… much more than my share. I mean, try to find a Canterbury Tale that doesn’t have sex in it, y’know?
Anyway, I often found myself in situations that seem similar to yours vis a vis modern vs traditional thought regarding religious propriety. And I was usually told (in no uncertain terms) to back off.
I loved when this happened.
It gave me the chance to teach my students that:
[ul]
[li]It’s OK to be wrong[/li][li]It’s OK to try something without knowing all the rules, discover you erred, and change.[/li][li]It’s OK when things don’t work out the way you planned[/li][li]It’s important to respect authority, even if you don’t agree with it[/li][li]It’s good to challange ideas, as long as you’re willing to listen to the answers to those challenges[/li][li]Always play by the rules, even if nobody else is[/li][/ul]
That’s just a few of the lessons I wrangled out of my “fights” with the administration. My students loved to hear about the entire process, from my original thoughts all the way up to my decision to follow instructions and change the game plan.
I guess what I am saying is that I agree with most of your OP - what irks me is when you write, “What, Teacher’s an idiot?” That is a dangerous conclusion to jump to; Please don’t teach your students to see the world that way.
I’ve been doing church for twenty years. I’ve found that no matter what you do, no matter how creative, how biblical, how selfless or how well thought out, you’re going to piss off some person in the congregation. As they say in the movie Babe: It’s the way it is. Even St. Francis annoyed some people. (notice I didn’t say pissed off)
