Say what you will about chainsaw juggling, but I feel like I’ve been doing one stupid thing after another lately. Does anyone else ever feel like that?
My idiot Uncle Clem says he wants to take up chainsaw juggling, but I’ve been trying to talk him out of it without being *too *vehement. You know, offhandedly.
I know a guy that had the entire left side of his body crushed. He’s all right now.
The best shampoo is on the top shelf. It’s Head and Shoulders above the rest.
I know a guy who tried chainsaw juggling once. They call him Lefty.
Anybody have any good puns? How about, say, three in one post?
No, but do I know this song that never ends:
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The doctor said everything will be all right
Second verse, same as the first
a little bit louder and a whole lot worse
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The doctor said everything will be all right
Third verse, same as the first
a little bit louder and a whole lot worse
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The doctor said everything will be all right
Fourth verse, same as the first
a little bit louder and a whole lot worse
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The doctor said everything will be all right
Fifth verse, same as the first
a little bit louder and a whole lot worse
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The doctor said everything will be all right
Sixth verse, same as the first
a little bit louder and a whole lot worse
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The doctor said everything will be all right
Seventh verse, same as the first
a little bit louder and a whole lot worse
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The cow kicked Nelly in the belly last night
The doctor said everything will be all right
Needless to say, it just goes on and on and on and on and on.
Hey, ya know this one?
I know an annoying song, annoying song, annoying song
I know an annoying song, and it goes like this
I know an annoying song, annoying song, annoying song
I know an annoying song, and it goes like this
Sing until you run out of breath or someone smacks you.
Lol, this is one of my favorites:
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
It gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
It gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
It gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
It gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
It gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
It gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves
It gets on everybody’s nerves
Kind of to the tune of Glory, Glory Halleluiah
And it goes on and on and on…
I hereby declare an end to the ‘never-ending annoying movie trope’ posts.
I feel that we, as Dopers, are better than this. We have an obligation to enlighten society and elevate the general level of public discourse. To this end I suggest we henceforth engage only in the sort erudition worthy of the highest standards. I say we should talk about music. I don’t care which music; it could Bach, Beethoven, or Debussy, but let’s use this valuable opportunity to edify and enlighten the world instead of wisecracking. Does anyone have a favorite symphony or other composition?
Anyone know any annoying songs? Things like “100 Bottles of Beer” or “The Bear Went Over the Mountain”.
Yeah, let’s not do that again. Any other topics…
Or, hey, I’ve got another great original idea for a movie. Okay, there’s two cops; one of them is real straight-laced and by-the-book, but the other is impulsive, intuitive, and flies by the seat of his pants!
But look, can we at least grant that the concept that .999999999999999 = 1 is expressing a form of one of the great original ideas?
(And have we run out of original ideas for movies yet?)
Hollywood is devoid of original ideas, so is music, TV, books. And I don’t think there’s too many original philosophical ideas left. Originality, as a concept, is dead. And even this thought is not original.
That’s an old joke, and trying to wrap a movie around it is going to end up with another old, tired, unoriginal storyline.
I guess that if you really wanted to try to sell a TV show you could go with the single-minded detective that uses deductive reasoning to point out things like his tent has been stolen.
A Hollywood friend of mine invited me to pitch ideas for a cop show, but my mind has gone totally blank. Help!
I want to eat 12 corndogs. Any one care?
(It is rumored that they cause brain lapses)
Hey, this could be a new game, like fuck, marry, kill. Let’s call it… eat, freeze, throw out. So, taking your example, I’d eat the corn dog, freeze the hot dogs, and throw out the smoked sausage. Seriously, sausage does not need smoke flavor.
Wow. I’ve never seen that, but I can imagine it would be a pretty amazing sight.
Now if only someone would come up with a wacky idea for a new three-option game…
Speaking of which, my kids were scrounging around behind a circus the other day and they came home with a big box full of corn dogs, hot dogs, and smoked sausage. Way too much for us to eat so I have to freeze some of it but I don’t have a lot of room right now because I just made a ton of ribs a couple weeks ago and froze a bunch of those and they are occupying much of the deep freeze. I think we have to eat some of them and freeze some of them but we have limited room. Plus you know the kids are jus going to get sick of all the wieners after having them for dinner a couple times.