This turkey took Viagra, and ignored the warning about four hour erections.
Now we can’t close the casket.
This turkey had the fish. On an Airplane! Over Lockerbie. With some Snakes.
This turkey died of a beakbleed after using its psychic powers to prevent a ruthless dictator from taking over the country.
Don’t you mean “repast”?
This turkey was overtaken. In a pit. By Global Warming. And froze to death.
This turkey chose… poorly.
This turkey’s watch has ended.
This turkey didn’t know Khaleesi spoke Valyrian.
This turkey went for the cornucopia.
This turkey ate some berries it stole from Peeta. Reserved for Seneca Crane.
This turkey was stung to death by tracker jackers. May have hallucinogenic effects.*
This turkey was a preacher, ridin’ on a midnight bus bound for Mexico.
*Wow, the level of material for this thread in “The Hunger Games” is really quite telling. 
This little turkey went to market… where they sold roasted turkeys.
This turkey was introduced to Ceti Alpha 6’s last remaining (indigenous) life form…
This turkey has joined the choir invisible.
This turkey was born a quail, but after years of doping in hopes of winning the Tour de France, he succumbed to 'roid rage.
This turkey couldn’t handle the truth!
This turkey died of ennui, staring out a window for the 26th consecutive day
This turkey died in a church and was buried along with its name.
This turkey was unfortunate enough to displease Jabba.
This turkey was on the Titanic.
The turkey was on the Lusitania.
This turkey was on the Andria Dora.
This turkey was on the Edmund Fitzgerald.
This turkey was shot by a man in Reno just to watch him die.
Yes sir, Officer Obie, I cannot tell a lie. I put that turkey under that garbage…
This turkey was last heard uttering
“Gobbler! They’re coming to get you, Gobbler!”
Turkey Time!
Turkey Time!
We killed this turkey and will make some brine.
Turkey Time!
Turkey Time!
Let’s have some turkey with some bread and wine*
*sung to the tune of Jesus Christ Superstar!
This turkey was hit by a driverless, solid-gold milk truck, wandering the streets of Waterbury, Conn. Isn’t Western engineering marvelous?