This turkey was stranded on Mars, but was unable to Science the Shit out of it, because, after all, he’s a turkey…
Spider Turkey!
Spider Turkey!
Does whatever a spider Turkey does!
Can he swing from a web?
No he can’t
He’s a Turkey
The force was weak in this turkey…
This turkey imitated Jar Jar Binks one too many times.
This turkey wouldn’t stop trying to help Tuco.
This turkey was hit by a flying lawnmower. Serve with mustard.
This turkey fell into a chasm full of lava while crying, “O my Precious! gobble” (Note: May be overcooked.)
Prize inside!*
*Warning: Choking Hazard, not for children under the age of three.
That damn turkey ate my finger just before that, completely deserved to die horribly if you ask me.
This turkey died from shock at the perfect username/post combo.
“Oh, I didn’t have to stuff it. It wasn’t empty.”
I missed this one the last time round, and am now sitting here giggling to myself. 
This turkey knock, knock, knocked on heaven’s door.
This turkey is now a zombie.
This turkey never had a lick of sense. (pass the biscuits, please)
This turkey had a failure to communicate.
This turkey is dead? Surely you can’t be serious!
Don’t call me Shirley.
This turkey went on a massive cocaine bender at a Nevada brothel.
This Turkey attempted to service the AE-35 antenna.
This Turkey was *Pedro.*Pedro the Turkey - YouTube
This turkey got waterboarding, and a whole lot more.
This turkey got out of the car to take a selfie with the lions.
This turkey took a fall in the night; sing Hallelujah!
This turkey was burned to death by his new cell phone.
This turkey found Slenderman in the background of a selfie.