This turkey was killed by hand with a sharp knife

This turkey refused to wear a facemask and asked what was I gonna do about that…

This turkey was quarantined with two other turkeys, and gobbled them both up.

This turkey felt tears in the rain. He looked up. Time to die.

This turkey tried his damnedest not to concede the election.

This turkey died in a stampede to get to the toilet paper being unloaded off a truck.

This turkey did his own research, and was no sheeple.

This turkey was killed by hand because the machines are stuck in a container off Long Beach.

This turkey set his Tesla on autopilot in the freeway in bad weather after dark.

This turkey was cancelled by the hungry mob for his posts on Twitter.

This turkey was shot storming the Capitol.

Thanks for bumping this; it’s the best holiday tradition!

This turkey is pining for the fjords.

This turkey just realized the thread has been going for a decade now.

The last thing this Turkey heard was ‘he’s coming right for us’.

This turkey loved the hot bath, and the herb and butter massage that followed, but what is that axe doi…

This turkey cost WAY more than a couple of years ago.

{ clap hands }

Thiiiiissss … :musical_note: turkey had a steamboat
The steamboat had a bell { ding ding! }
This turkey went to heaven,
And the steamboat went to :musical_note:

HELL-o operator
Please give me number nine …

(…and etc.)

This turkey was sure he had shot all six bullets and was feeling lucky.

A turkey’s got to know his limitations.

Never mind.

This turkey is masquerading as a duck this year, and is currently defrosting in the fridge.

The turkey’s last words were, “Hold my beer.”

This turkey didn’t get his booster shot.

This turkey left the tent, saying, “I am just going outside and may be some time.” Thaw completely before cooking.