I have no problem with the “do you need change?” question. It seems pretty common around here, and the server normally does it without looking at the amount of cash given. Now if he/she looks at the amount, and then decides that the amount of change would be an apporpriate tip and tries to suggest as much, thats not cool.
The OP said the waiter asked if they needed change ‘without missing a beat’. That suggests to me that he always asks, regardless of the amount.
Its never appropriate to give a dirty look based on a tip.
When I was a server I never asked if they wanted their change. I would either say, “I’ll be right back with your change,” as that gave them an opportunity to tell me to keep it, or I just brought their change and waited until they left to go scout the table for my tip. I think being asked if you want your change is just rude and it sort of puts the customer is an odd position. If you want your change you look like a tightass even if you planned on leaving a decent tip.
Yeppers. And not a penny more. Exception: When restaurant has pre-set policy to build in an 18.5% tip on parties of more than 6, and such. If we have a large group, the expense is approved even if the tip shows as more than 15%.
A question about tipping and running a tab, sorry for the teensy hijack.
My first time in a bar in Chicago I had to pay for each drink as it arrived, I tipped every time
The next time I went in, about a week later, they let me run up a tab.
Why? I’m fairly certain they couldn’t have remembered me from a week ago
Chowder, anytime a bartender lets you run a tab without securing it with a credit card, that bartender is essentially extending you credit himself. Because he/she will have to pay your tab if you forget to pay it.
So if it was the same bartender, they may have indeed remembered you.
If it was a different bartender…some bartenders are picky about tabs, and some aren’t. Some people get offended when you ask them for a credit card; you have to weigh that against the risk of them forgetting or deliberately walking the tab you let them run.
As a bartender myself, if I’ve seen you before and you tipped reasonably well and you didn’t get too drunk (flight risk!), I would probably let you run a tab without securing it with a credit card.
Also, if the bar is slow and you’re not ordering for a group of people…just a few quiet beers…I will probably run you a tab. The idea being that if you do get up to leave without having paid me, I will notice.
A busy bar is harder to control and harder to keep an eye on, so in that case I have to have a credit card or you have to pay cash per drink unless you’re an established regular I see all the time.
And even then…I just paid a $30 tab last night for a couple of beer-drinking regulars who made the mistake of taking a couple of shots of Jager. They got drunk and walked.
[/]hijack
As for the OP…the server was rude to ask–I’ll second and third everyone who said that the proper thing to say is “I’ll be right back with your change”–and I would have been annoyed also.
But eight bucks is not an unreasonable tip on a tab that size, FTR. He shouldn’t have assumed you were that kind of tipper, because that could make you into a bad tipper out of spite, but I’d chalk it up to ignorance or inexperience.
I guess you may be right about them remembering me, possibly my sexy English accent 
and I allus tip well when in the USA.
I found out the first time I visited, big tip=great service, measly tip=“here, catch your drink”
Hijack/
Do the prices in the UK and the US vary substantially after you include the US expectation for more generous tipping? I’ve never been over the pond but the general impression from friends is that dining out is cheaper but I wonder if this is because they’re unaware of the expected percentage tip. Tipping in the UK is usually around 10% although people frequently leave more if they want to reward great service (or in my case, if they’ve had a few too many and have formed an unnatural attachment to the waiting staff). 
/end Hijack
I think that in general it is cheaper to eat in the US even accounting for the tip.
Like I said before, tip big and you’ll get excellent service, tip low and you definitely will not be treated like royalty
10% in the USA is not good
When I go to a bar that I am not known to be an excellent tipper I will pay for the first drink or two by cash and tip extra large so the bartender knows that I will take care of them if they take care of me. I call it beer insurance.
Most good bartenders know what I am doing and/or catch on fast. When I return to the establishment and have four beers and ask for the check. I am charged for one beer and the bartender gets a $10.00 tip.
Most people/establishments in hospitality are aware of and practice some sort of industry/good will discount.