Those dastardly Zionists are at it again!

The Arab street has the best conspiracy theories. You never know what those wacky, fun-loving Zionist infidels will do next. Fotunately, we have a brave legion of dedicated nutjobs protecting us from spying squirrels, penis-shrinking robot combs, and Hanna-Barbera cartoons.

Now Pepsi Cola has fallen to the pernicious influence of the Elders of Zion. You see, apparently PEPSI stands for Pay Every Penny to Save Israel. And we can’t have that, can we? Hazem Abu Ismail, the courageous tinfoil-hatter who exposed the plot, knows this because his little son told him. I mean, what more reliable source can you get than your tweenager?

Remember, boycott Pepsi or the aliens in your TV set will fry your brains.

I’m going to have to start looking for ways to work the phrase “penis-shrinking robot combs” into everyday conversation.

“Hey, InvisibleWombat–Does my hair look okay?”

“You’re pretty windblown, buddy. Care to borrow my penis-shrinking robot comb?”

That’s quite funny, especially considering that a company whose name (supposedly) stands for Pay Every Penny to Save Israel abided by the Arab boycott of Israel for many years.

Zev Steinhardt

True. To this day, Israelis are almost exclusively Coke drinkers.

I knew this Jewish guy and I asked him how it felt to rule the world. He was rather upset about the fact that he hasn’t been receiving his “rule the world” checks that all Jewish people get. He must have missed a meeting or something.

Well, otherwise it would be too obvious! Duuuh! [sub]fnord[/sub]

Say what you will about the Jews, they tend to be smart and not fall for stupid propaganda and urban myths and conspiracies. That seems to be the exclusive domain of people with an anti-Jewish agenda and their uneducated, backwater populations. It’s so much easier to blame the Jews for everything when your own country is a piece of shit.

I’m sorry . . .I couldn’t quite make out your entire argument. Did I miss something?

Jews don’t fall for propaganda?!?! I wish! I could send you some of the emails from my Dad, but I delete them as they come in. Oy, there are some doozies. :rolleyes: Stuff that Snopes has debunked, fer crying out loud. :rolleyes:

Propaganda is not the exclusive domain of Arab leaders. For example, Cuba has used anti-American propaganda effectively for internal political purposes, and I seem to recall the previous POTUS using anti-Arab, anti-Muslim, and anti-liberal propaganda a time or two. (“John Kerry’s up in the polls - time for a terror alert!”) :mad:

Hah, there’s an entire website for Jewish urban legends and myths. And there’s some real embarassing stuff on there.

Apparently some Jews believe that Sandy Koufax holds the most career wins among Jewish pitchers - when anyone with half a brain would know that the leader is actually Ken Holtzman.

I mean, c’mon.

As a Jew, I can assure you that we are every bit as stupid, uneducated and gullible as everyone else.

Thanks for the link! Who knew there was a Jewish Snopes? Very interesting. I’m pleasantly suprised that they managed to confirm one of my favorite “This can’t possibly be true” stories.

Well, if Israel drank Pepsi everyone would KNOW something was up, but they were smart and made Coke their drink of choice, to throw everyone off the trail the sneaky bastards!

I’m curious about this. Can you provide more info or a link? The “Jewish Snopes” site linked to above returned zero results for “Pepsi.”

Zionist squirrels? I’d hate to have been the mohel who had to perform that particular Brit milah.

Whoa, that’s a cool website.

I thought Pepsi was under a boycott for supporting gay rights. Poor PepsiCo. Just can’t win, can they?

Jews (in America) actually have significantly higher, higher education rates.

What’s there to say? I live in Israel; Pepsi is hard to find in supermarkets and is rarely on the menu in restaurants, and when people say “cola”, they mean Coke. Coca-Cola was the sole cola drink on the market (excep for some inferior local brands) for decades, and people stay loyal to their soft drinks. Pepsi tried to break in to the market in the 90’s, and mostly failed.

However, we are better lovers.
My bedpost is my cite!

I want to see pictures of the squirrels wearing spy stuff. Are we talking TV cameras or little jet back packs? Little fedoras and shades?