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That’s the most disturbing thing that’s come up yet in this thread, by a long shot.

It’s a dead heat in a zeppelin race! They’re about to attack! Aiiieeee!

Not to worry, I have restrictive undergarments!

We may have a new meme, threat titties.

Threat titties or ass pennies, which do you prefer, A poll

SSG Schwartz

And that is why I should NOT read the SDMB while talking to a customer on the phone. Customer asked if I was ok when I started choking on the snort that was trying to come out of my face! Thank you for making my day!

Wow LOUNE, you must be the suckle master if you can get her to snort.

As David Terrell, former Michigan wide receiver once said at a frat party, after leaving a bedroom with a random female: “Who got the bomb dick?”

List of exploding penises at the University of Michigan

  1. Terrell, David.
    2)Kaczynski, Theodore

  2. Ford, Gerald

  3. Liu, Lucy

Well good for David Terrell, one does need something to fall back on when it’s proved that one couldn’t catch a football if it was fucking Fed-Ex’d to you.

<not a bitter Bears fan, no way, not me.>

Put me down for “threat titties”, please.

Talk about a receiver that had all the tools and talent but couldn’t get it all together, huh?

Non-emergency 999 calls. Tittie threats.

SSG Schwartz

Oh, that sounds like an emergency to me.
It also sounds like the well-crafted plot of an adult film.

Starring Harry Reems and Ophellia Bush

SSG Schwartz

Tweets!

“Help! Someone’s here and he’s threatening my titties! Officer! Help!”

“Fella, I don’t know what to tell you. She threatened me with those titties…I mean…look at them.”

“You’re right. We should look at them”

bow chicka wow wow chicka chicka wow wow

How did you get an advanced copy of my script?

SSG Schwartz

How did* you* get an advanced copy of my script?

I’m in ur stash, steelin ur scriptz.