Thursday night musings

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Some thoughts that have gone through my head in the last few minutes:

Why do I not feel happy?
Why don’t I feel like I’m doing what I want with my life?
What do I want to do with my life?
I love my husband.
He doesn’t like animals at home…wants to travel, etc and doesn’t feel comfortable getting someone else to take care of them. I love animals and resent the fact that he doesn’t want any.
We’re thinking of going to Crete in September. Why do I feel like I may want to stay there?
Why doesn’t my stepson look for another place to live? He’s 24.
My job is pointless. I’m working only to raise money for the next trip or vacation.
Why do I need some/more time alone?
I’ve been in this place for the longest I’ve ever been everywhere: living in the same location/place; in the longest relationship I’ve been in; I’m almost 50.
Does anyone else ever think these thoughts?

Dopers: Does anyone ever think this way? Or is it just me? Not necessarily looking for help…perhaps just some insight as to, if my thoughts are just strange, or does everyone think this once in a while?

2

I think this way sometimes. Especially late at night, tired, sick of winter. When I think those thoughts on a bright sunny day when I’m just sitting under the trees in the back yard watching the kids play, that’s when I’ll start to worry about it.

3

Yes, there are times I don’t think about it…then, there’s the times I do. And I wonder if I’m being the best my husband deserves.

Sometimes, I just want to live on my own, do my own stuff, not to worry about anyone else.

Then, when we go to bed, and then there’s that sigh, you know, that one just when you are falling asleep, you know that comfortable sigh.

Then I wake up the next morning and you think “we’re starting over, here were go again”.

I guess I just wonder: am I living the lfe I want to life?

When do you know you’re doing/living the right thing/way?

4

I wish I had some answers for the big questions. I don’t, but I do know this is a lot of pressure to put on yourself. Sometimes you need a long walk or a movie to forget your problems or depressurize for a while and then come back to them with a fresh mind.

5

I think all of us feel this way sometimes, and some of us feel that way most of the time. This can be the impetus to change, or it can be the start of a new resolve to accept your life the way it is, and focus more on the positive aspects. Then again, it could just be Thursday night musings.