Tipping in America: the insult tip

The BBQ Pit
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Americans may or may not take milk in their tea; you have to ask for it. (I put lemon in mine; my working-class British ex-BF’s family thought I was snooty until he did some explaining.)

I’ve noticed that it’s common to have tea with milk among those of Irish descent where I live now (metro Boston).

Anyway, if only there were a way to communicate that you would like something. Yes, she should have asked “Can I get you anything else?” and “How is everything?”, but if the food wasn’t awful and the waitress didn’t do anything truly horrible, an insult tip is not right.

142

You forgot threw a stack of plates like discuses.

143

You think companies never break the law? Yeah, right.

144

OK, we’ll allow that as well even though that’s in sub-section (a4) along with “using a whole ham as a club”

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Wow! All-caps. That definitely places your evidence at a higher standard than those sham posters, Stranger on a Train and Left Hand of Dorkness brought to the table.

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Maybe we heed a thread asking why so many people think tipping at restaurants is as uniquely American as the other things. It’s not. Many other countries don’t have it, but it’s far from unique to the US.

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I always thought it was 1¢, to signify “I did not forget the tip, your service was just so awful that you don’t deserve one.”

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To quote Donald Pleasence from The Great Escape: “Tea without milk is so uncivilized.”

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It’s been a day and a half since the OP tried uselessly to defend their position. Maybe the thread should die now.

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My evidence is from the U.S. Department of Labor. Others are posting anecdotes. Which one do you think meets a higher standard of evidence?

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How do you know what others are tipping, and who are “jerks”? If tipping is for service, are you being a jerk if you leave a low tip for genuinely lousy service (not food quality)? How have you decided that 20% or “more than 20%” is fair or reasonable? Is the same percentage appropriate at all types of restaurants (diners, cafes, casual, bar, family, hotel, resort, upscale, etc.)? Is the same percentage appropriate if you drank water or if you spent $15 per person in drinks?

Why has the customary amount risen from 10 to 15 to 20 percent over time? Do we know, and should we care, that tips are usually split with bartenders and busboys, but not always? Should we care that servers sometimes make a lot of money on a shift, but other times not very much?

While I think the OP was misguided in leaving only a nickel, and tips should be left except in very rare occasions, I’m of the opinion that a tip or gratuity is completely discretionary on the part of the customer. I also think things tend to average out in the end. If they didn’t, why would servers still work where they do?

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I am not, and mean no offense to any other person visiting from abroad. I’m afraid I can’t explain due to the Mod note.

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The problem is that D’Anconia is right. Federal law requires that, one way or another, all workers, including tipped workers, be paid at least the federal minimum wage.

Does this always happen? Of course not. There are always people who are willing to break the law, and that group includes employers who try to get around the minimum wage laws. The first time i learned about employers doing this was all the way back in 2001, just after i moved to the US, when i read Barbara Ehrenreich’s excellent book, Nickel and Dimed: On (Not) Getting By in America. In the book, Ehrenreich discusses the fact that tipped workers are allowed by federal law to be paid $2.13 an hour, as long as their employer brings them up to full minimum wage if they don’t get enough tips. She also notes, however, that many employees are not aware of this rule, and so some employers take advantage of it, and fail to meet their obligations.

But the fact that some people break the law doesn’t mean that the law doesn’t exist. Arguing that D’Anconia is wrong here is like arguing that robbery or sexual assault are allowed in America, just because some people ignore the laws against robbery and sexual assault.

For example, i think that Stranger On A Train’s argument here is misguided:

First, you need to replace the word “ostensibly” with “legally.” There’s nothing hidden or misleading about the law itself. Employers are absolutely required, by federal law, to ensure that their employees, including tipped employees, receive at least the federal minimum wage for the work they do. And if tipped employees are paid $2.13 per hour, and their tips do not bring them up to $7.25, the employer is absolutely required to make up the difference.

I also take issue with the “no enforcement” claim. It is true that violations of this law probably often go unenforced because, as Ehrenreich notes, many employees do not even know that the law exists, and that they’re being stiffed. But this doesn’t mean that there’s no enforcement. I guarantee that if you know of an instance where this sort of underpayment by employers is occurring, and you gather evidence that it’s occurring and get employees to make a complaint, the Department of Labor will take your claim seriously, and will investigate.

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[QUOTE]

$7.25/hr in most places (all places?) is shit pay. That’s why I’m a generous tipper. On the rare occasion I get bad service, I assume the server is having a bad day and still tip well.

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I completely agree that $7.25 is shitty. It’s fucking terrible. I also tend to tip well, even if the service isn’t great. The server would pretty much have to tell me to go fuck myself, or spit in my food, for me to leave no tip at all.

But that is, for the purpose of my argument about employer obligations, irrelevant. The $7.25 minimum sucks, but it is, in fact, the minimum, and employers are obliged to conform to it, even for tipped employees. They can pay their tipped employees less than $7.25, but if the employees’ tips don’t bring them up to minimum wage, the employer is legally obligated to make up the difference.

FYI, as of 2016, 29 US states have minimum wages that are higher than the federal minimum.

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Thank you.

I’ve been trying to recall when I first heard of milk in tea, and I’m almost positive this is it.

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Actually, at least at the McDonald’s here, the sequence has recently changed to: go up to the counter, order, take your number table-tent, sit down, they bring the food to you.

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Waiters and waitresses make a great deal more money than people who actually work for minimum wage or a little above it. Do you also seek out the cooks and other back-end workers at restaurants? They probably make minimum wage. What about store clerks? They are waiting on you and almost certainly make less than waiters. Do you leave a tip each week for your trash hauler? What about the lifeguard who’s watching your kid at the pool? For that matter, what about the people watching your kids at day care? There is a good chance they are making less than the servers you go out of your way to generously tip.

Look, I’m not saying to not leave a tip, because it is indeed customary where it is indeed customary. But if you really want to go on a crusade to pay more to people who aren’t earning much money, and who provide services to you, then there are a lot who make less than tipped servers. It just seems to me that people are free to pursue other work if the combination of hours, treatment, pay and benefits isn’t satisfactory. As I said, I assume that it all works out in the end, or the servers would go elsewhere.

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Am I the only person that read her post as sarcasm? It was in response to this (IMO) even snottier post that everyone ignored:

I hope it’s not a violation to talk about this, but I think she’s being misunderstood by several people including our dear Idle. /sucking up

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Servers make more *because *we tip. I would vote to increase the minimum wage for everyone, and I do vote for politicians who favor such a move. Yes, lots of people have lousy income and deserve more. If not for generous tippers, wait staff would be on the list.