As many of you may have noticed, I am an atheist. My husband, however, is a Lutheran. When we married, I agreed to raise the kids as Lutherans. No problem for the first few years – I just raised 'em same as I was raised in a sort of generic-christian fashion. My husband wasn’t especially interested in actually joining a church at that time – he just didn’t want his sprouts to be godless. Anyway, the kids are now old enough to be confirmed and Kevin wants them to take the classes and do so. Again, no problem. We found a nearby church – one Kevin liked and I could stand – and the kids have started Sunday School, confirmation classes and youth group. Dori is also in the youth choir. Kevin and I are going to services with the kids on a regular basis – again, Kevin enjoys it and I don’t mind – it’s family-together time, we go out to breakfast afterwards, etc. Kevin may or may not actually join this church officially – he has been a non-church member for so long that he would probably have to take some classes to join. He has said that he wouldn’t mind doing this. I will not join officially, because I think it would be hypocritical to do so, but I don’t object to him doing so.
Anyway, we’ve just been notified that ‘consecration week’ is upcoming. This is apparently the period in which church members (official and unofficial) pledge their contributions for the year. We don’t want to go into this blind, but want to figure out a fair figure beforehand. My research hasn’t yielded much except the usual 10% suggestion. This seems like WAY too much. My in-laws back in Wisconsin give $5 whenever they show up for services – about $100 a year. This seems like way too little – especially because, with two kids in various classes we seem to be using a lot more than that in church resources. So, what’s standard among religious Dopers? Do any of you really tithe 10%? Kevin finds that impossible to believe, BTW. He was surprised to even hear that 10% was a standard, and didn’t believe me when I first brought it up. We’re leaning towards $100 a month – at least until the kids are confirmed. I’d appreciate any guidance anyone can offer.
Well, I’m not religious anymore, but when I was a churchgoer (this goes for Peta Tzunami as well), we gave 10% of our paycheck to the church. 10% of our pre-tax income, for that matter. I do not recomment this, however, as we were obviously crazy.
A friend of mine also gives 10% of everything, including gambling winnings. Now that’s irony.
I would say to pledge whatever you are comfortable with, and not feel pushed into a dollar figure that you don’t like. Remember, you’re making a donation, not paying an invoice, and like any charity, the church should thank you kindly for whatever you choose to donate.
When I went to church, my contributions were based on what my current employment status was. I’m sure the church would have liked ten percent of my annual income, but there were many times when I needed every penny myself (I went through a rough patch in the recession of the early '90s). Thankfully, the church I attended didn’t make public the gifts of individuals, so there was nobody looking down their nose at me for not meeting any preset quota.
Remember also that there are many ways to contribute that do not necessarily involve money. You can volunteer your time for church-related activities (visiting shut-ins, helping at the church’s soup kitchen or food bank, or contributing your time or items to the various bazaars and bake sales and suppers that are a part of church life). My experience has been that churches often appreciate this kind of participation just as much as they like money.
We give the standard 10%, usually a little bit more due to ‘special’ stuff like building a new nursery or whatever. I guess its a personal thing - to each his/her own.
I used to balance the checkbook of a church going friend (how 'bout that for expertise in the area?), she gave $100 per month (course that was about 15 years ago, but she probably still gives the same amount).
I stopped going to church as a teen. My churck kept sending me the collection envelopes, though.
As a Catholic, I was told it would be ideal to give 5% to the church and 5% to other charities. I come close on the church bit, but not on the other. Still, the Catholic church (and I would presume the tithing Protestant churches) would want you to take care of your family first.
OTOH, Rams quarterback Kurt Warner is a very devout non-denominational Protestant, and it’s a known fact here that he tithes 10% of his GROSS to the St. Louis Family Church. Obviously, he has one very happy pastor.
I’m sure the church would like to have you give 10%, but the reality is that in Biblical times, the church was the only social welfare agency around – they educated their members, took care of them when they were sick, helped them when they got too old to work, etc. So 10% seemed like a pretty fair figure for the times.
Nowadays few people expect the church to be their safety net. Mrs. Kunilou and I think that our contribution to our church should be proportionate to our total charity donations. Since we do use the church a lot (youth groups for the kids, membership groups, pastoral counseling, etc.) we tend to give generously. We also tend to give more generously to something like the public library, which we use a lot.
It may be difficult for you to place much value on what you’re getting from a church, but I suppose the bottom line is, don’t break yourself financially, but if you’re getting something out, put something back.
I give 10%, pre-tax, as well as other times when I feel led to give to people on the street or whatever. FWIW, I don’t consider it my money anyway. My church doesn’t publish how much people give, nor do they say how much you should give.
My minister told our church that you should give 10 % and he didn’t care if it was the big number or the little number.(He’d gotten in trouble at the first service by misusing net and gross income). I do usually give 10 % of the big number, pre-tax, but not always and I don’t have enough expenses at the present time for it to be a problem. Many churches today don’t emphasize 10%. My parents who have a significant amount of income that doesn’t come in Dad’s paycheck give 10 % of his net paycheck to the church and various other amounts to various other charities. Many people would say that if you also give money to the food shelf or United Way or other charities you can count that towards your 10%.
Well, my parents give 10% of, I think, their pre-tax income. I know they also give to certain charities, but I don’t know if that’s in addition to the 10% or included.
And I just graduated from college and have a good job but lots of debt, so right now I’m only giving about 5% of my post-tax income. But that’s going to change as soon as I’m out of debt (which, unfortunately, looks like it’s going to be a while!).
I think the issue is not how much you give, but a combination of supporting the community and remembering in a VERY tangible way that all you have is from God; the more you have been blessed, the more you should share the blessing. So, yeah, 10% is a lot (MAN, is it a lot!), but when it comes down to it, I’m thankful I have 10% to give.
I was taught by 3 different churches (RLDS, Lutheran, and Catholic) that you should give 10% of your profit. That is, after taxes AND after you’ve paid for housing, clothing, and food (i.e. necessities). This seems like a very reasonable number. All three churches pointed out to me that the Mormon (LDS) church required 10% of income, which sounds very high.
So far responses have implied that most churches suggest 10% pretax. Hmmm… Does this vary with where you are? I was in the Baltimore area. I attended the RLDS church and went to Lutheran and Catholic schools.
I suggest you think about the 10% of profit number. It gives you a bit of flexibility and should be a reasonable number. If your profit is non-existant, don’t worry about the services you’re getting. You deserve the help. It’s hard to get a firm figure on profit because you could probably eat cheaper (or cloth cheaper or whatever) if you needed to, this is what gives you flexibility.
My church teaches that 10% is merely a starting point. That is, if you can afford to give less, by all means give less. If you can afford to give more, give more. Matters of pre-tax, post-tax, etc. are left to the individual believer.
If you truly want to know what Mrs. Rastahomie and I give, I’ll tell ya: we’ve recently been trying to give 10% post-tax, down to the penny. However, we’ve entered a bit of a rough stretch, so I’m sure God will be patient with us if we don’t give as much for a while.
I tithe regularly, and this past spring, when I was having my taxes done, I seem to remember noticing that I had given closer to 10% than 5% of my individual income (my wife does not attend church, so it doesn’t seem fair to me to appropriate a percentage of her income, even if we do lump it all together in a joint account).
This is only what goes into the offering envelope, understand. Other cash donations, which are not receipted, are forthcoming on an irregular basis, and I also give regularly to a Christian charity outside of my church. It probably doesn’t add up to 10% altogether, but I agree that it’s the giving that’s important, as well as the spirit in which it’s done.
What sorta surprised me about the OP was that you’re required to pledge a certain amount. I’ve never encountered that, but then maybe I’ve led a sheltered life. What happens if you don’t live up to your pledge? Does the bishop come out and break your knees? Do you wake up with a horse’s head in your bed? Seriously, is this a part of the record that’s available for other members of the church to see? I really don’t see it as being anyone’s business but you and the trustees. Even my pastor didn’t know what anyone in the congregation gave. I find it disturbing somehow that you have to pledge.
“I’m going to remind you that tithing is 10 percent off the top, people. That’s gross income, not net. I’m going to pass this around a second time…” --Reverend Lovejoy
I’m Catholic, and at least for the past ten years or so, they’ve been suggesting 5% to the church and another 5% to other charities. They generally don’t ask you to promise a certain amount of money except in two instances. Since my children attend the parish school, I must contribute a certain amount ($7 per week) to be charged the parishioner tuition rate,and when large scale fundraising is going on they will ask people to promise a certain amount ( chosen by the donor) in each of the next few years.As far as I know, nothing is done if someone doesn’t fulfill their pledge.Parishioners don’t find out the amount of other people’s pledges unless a particularly generous donor is thanked in the bulletin.
I feel I should give about 10% post tax, more (if I can swing it) for special projects, or special missions, and also to charities. (I’ve been horrible about attendance lately, and if I’m not there I probably won’t go out of my way to give. But when I am there, then I do.)
It really doesn’t seem like that much, of course, I was raised in the church and always expected to give to the church - but I can see where it might if it comes at you out of the blue.
(As far as my parents’ church goes) the pledges give the church some basis for making a budget for the upcoming year. The only person who sees the individual pledges is the guy who does the books - everyone else just sees the sum total amount pledged by the congregation. Nothing will happen if you don’t give your pledged amount.
When I was growing up (well, what i was substantially younger), my family game 10 percent of money to charity and 10 percent to savings. Charity meant church and other stuff.
Before I ship this baby over to IMHO, does someone have statistics on what the average contribution is by church members or some similar GQ kind of thing?
I usually open my wallet before chuch, take out approximately 10% of whatever is in there- because that is my post-bill money, and give that. It usually works out to about $25 a month, but it’s what I have.
Just for the record, and I seem to be opening my Bible in GQ a lot lately, the 10% tithe is an Old Testament thing. If you’re a Christian and you believe that Jesus fulfilled the Jewish Law, there’s no reason to think that you’re obligated to pay 10%, regardless of what your church would like for you to think. In fact, the early Biblical church was simply given everything you owned and then gave the money out to people in a communist like fashion. I’m not certain if this was a requirement or not (Acts seems to suggest it wasn’t, but rather it was the Christian thing to do) and Peter tells Ananias that the money he earned from selling his land was his to do with what he wished.
Anyway, my point was that tithing is not a Christian requirement and is a rather legalistic way of determing how you feel about God in your heart. Give whatever you feel comfortable with; comfortable in your own ability to feed and clothe your family and comfortable before God in your heart. When I was going to church, I usually gave whatever I had on me at the time which exceeded 10% most of the time. Of course, I was in college, so it wasn’t too difficult to give even $10 and exceed 10% of my weekly income
