To cut off the nose to spite/despite the face

Factual Questions
1

Which is correct? I’ve always used “to spite”, but “despite” would make sense too…

This is kinda borderline GQ/IMHO, so if a mod wants to move it, that’s fine.

2

“to spite”

3

I believe it is “to spite” as in Why cut off your nose to spite your face?

For example, a woman who denies her husband sex because she’s mad at him - problem is that she doesn’t get sex, either.

So she’s cut off her nose (not getting sex) to spite her face (she denies sex to hubby).

If you say “despite your face”, I guess you could interpret it to mean that she’s cut off her nose (denies sex to hubby) despite her face (despite the fact that she, too, doesn’t get sex).

I suppose it works either way but I’ve always said “cut off your nose to spite your face.”

Tibs

4

I’ve always heard, and read, “to spite”.

http://www.toadshow.com.au/anne/cliches/clfull.asp?clid=9919

5

I realize the OP has been answered, but I just wanted to vote for this as one of my favorite sayings. Not sure what it’s called. Is it an “aphorism”?

I just think it’s very clever and makes a neat, albeit gory, mind picture.

6

–>speaking as mod<–

This is factual enough vs. just opinion that I think it’d do better in GQ. Off it goes!

Veb
–>resumes non-mod voice<–

7

Saying ‘Cutting of the nose despite the face.’ makes little, if any, sense. It means that you will cut off the nose even though the face will impede your progress. Look at it this way: Saying ‘I made it here despite the airlines.’ means that the airlines impeded your coming here. However, saying ‘I made it here to spite the airlines.’ means that you came here with the intention of spiting the airlines. Two different phrases, two very different meanings.