Right, this is going to be lame, but its p***ed me of today, so I’m going to rant about it.
My brother’s quite a few years younger than I am, and EVERY single fucking week, on a Wednesday night, he will call me up to help with his applied maths problems.
Fine, no problem you might think, EXCEPT:-
Every time he calls, its about 11pm (and I’m in the UK, so there’s no time difference to worry about!)
Its bloody dfficult to do maths, especially applied maths (we’re taking Newton’s Laws and things like that here) over the phone, with no way of clearly explaining to him how his diagram should look.
He’s not content with me simply guiding him as to how to do the problem, he wants the whole frigging answer.
Wednesday night is not a good night to call me to have long involved conversations. You know why? Because I have to go and fucking teach maths to a bunch of first year undergrads on Thursday morning, and Wednesday night is the only free time I get AT ALL, all week to prepare for my class.
Guess what? I enjoy teaching, its good fun, but NOT OVER THE PHONE. And, I’m not here to give you the answers. What are you going to do in your exams when you get stuck on a question, get your mobile out of your back pocket and call me in the middle of your exam??
No. I didn’t think so. So why the hell don’t you learn to bloody think!!! Its not difficult. Just because I teach maths anyway, doesn’t mean I’m going to be perfectly happy to interrupt my preparation to help you. Now, if you’re prepared to pay me £12.50 an hour, yeah, sure. But otherwise, try calling me, say on Thursday, the homework doesn’t have to be in whilst the following Monday.
I don’t mind helping, jst not when I’m expected to drop other, equally important things to do it.
There. That feels better. I can go back to my prep now. I’ll still be awake at 1am going through it all, but thats because the lecturer’s a bastard and sets nasty questions, which even I find difficult. But that’s another rant.
Two words: answering machine. Screen his calls. Whoops, already gone to bed and didn’t hear the phone. Was down at the pub looking for a pint and a shag. Had a late night dental appointment.
If you start getting busy on Wednesday nights, that’ll force him to sink or swim on his own. You’ll be doing him a favor – if you keep helping him, he will fail his exams.
Giraffe, I know that. Its why I’m loath to help him. I’ve tried screening his calls. It doesn’t work. He keeps on ringing, until he gets an answer. Or, worse still, goes and tells mum. Who then calls me and gives me a stern lecture as to “how I’m the only one who he can ask for help, and that he will pass his exams” etc, etc. The sink or swim argument won’t work with my mum.
I can’t win. Short of my strategy which I will use eventually when he really winds me up, is to help him to such an extent that he will fail his exams. However, that is a last resort, because Universities will see his first year results, and I don’t want to mess up his University career.
It might sound harsh, but tell your both your brother and your mum to grow up. Try and be polite. But you are NOT your brother’s tutor. You do not HAVE to do what mum says. YOU have to stand firm and set a (positive) example to the rest of your family. You won’t be taking his exams for him will you? Your mother has to learn to stop nagging and your brother has to learn to sink or swim on his own two legs.
Hmm… a classic case of improper trainging. All younger siblings must be regularly sat on to ensure proper development of their mental facutlites. If this is neglecting beyond the time that you remain bigger than them and/or they exceed the age of 12, they will invariably punish you for it.
Tell him to bugger off. His feeling will sort themselves out. I suspect his grades will do the same.
From my experience, with my sister, whom I love dearly:
It will never end.
Luckily, the math problems have gotten easier over time, as it is no longer homework, it’s quick calculations for her job. Now it’s about the average of numbers, or applying percentages - stuff that can be answered in seconds rather than hour long torturous conversations over the phone.
I think it’s punishment for having convinced her that I knew everything when I was 4 and she was 2. I was far too young to see the consequences of that action.
Amarinth I foolishly did a similar thing when I was about seven and he was two. Now I’m paying for it. The fact that I have two physics degrees and am doing a PhD doesn’t do much to dispell that illusion. Plus he gets the “your sister’s done this, you can do much better” spiel all the time, which doesn’t help matters in the slightest.
:sigh: I had a good whinge this morning about it to my SO, who’s seen me through the past few years of coping with this. He keeps on telling me to tell my younger brother to get off his backside and think for a change. Which I do. And I get a guilt trip about it.
Not only is “maths” common usage over here, people look at you in a wierd way if you use “math”.
Oh, and for the record, I use to tutor him in English too. He got an A for it in his GCSEs. (Exams taken at 16 for those of you not familiar with British terms).