I hope you didn’t spend too much time drilling away the lock on my passenger side door. Don’t you know that my car can be opened with a pair of child safety scissors? You could have opened my car much, much easier than that. From the moment I saw my car had been broken into this morning, I knew I wasn’t dealing with a brainiac.
And why did you steal my owner’s manual? Did you need it for something? Perhaps you mistook it for some CDs. Oh, by the way, the reason there weren’t any CDs in my car for you to steal is that MY FRICKIN’ CD PLAYER WAS BROKEN. Yeah, that’s right, it’s broken. I wish I could see the look on your face when you realize that all your trouble went toward getting a broken fucking CD player. So let’s see…you drilled out a lock you could open with a nail file, and then you stole a CD player that doesn’t work. I’d almost feel sorry for you if I didn’t want to punch your face through the back of your skull. My only consolation is that your total take will consist of whatever you can get for the Stevie Nicks CD that was stuck in the player, provided it’s not scratched. Good luck with that. Keep up the good work FUCKER!
At this rate you’ll have enough money for a single crack rock by the end of the week. In the meantime my insurance company is putting me through hoops, and my dash is hanging half off. You little uneducated hoodlum wanna-be gangsta piece of shit mistake of a bastard fuckin child waste of air IDIOT. You really proved your worth last night.
I used to have a piece of shit car which I didn’t bother to lock (small town in Illinois, driver’s side lock was jammed, and it really was a piece of shit). Anyway, one evening after work I forgot and left my backpack on the floor of the back seat for a few hours. Of course, that was the evening someone went through the car.
Strangely, they didn’t just take the bag, but rather rifled through it a few feet from the car. They removed my prescription glasses (but left the case) and all of my mechanical pencils, and left the rest, which included a couple of fairly expensive textbooks. Bizarre. I used to wonder if one day I’d come across someone wearing my glasses and have to chase them.
In Chicago they just bash your window out if they see something they like inside. Well, this happened to me once while I was at a concert. I called the cops and filed a report, that’s that. The next week I read in the paper some guy caught someone breaking into his car in the same area. The thief was beaten to death by the guy, no charges were filed. You know, sometimes there is justice in the world.
My GF’s car was broken into twice last summer. I considered sleeping in the car with a bat.
I feel your pain.
When I lived in a townhouse community a few years ago, I sometimes forgot to lock the door to my Ford Escort. One morning, I noticed the glove compartment was opened and the contents riffled through. Nothing was missing, not even the unabridged Book-on-Tape from the Public Library. Perhaps the thief manqué was civic minded and didn’t want to steal public property on loan to a citizen.
I don’t know if I should be proud or insulted that there was nothing of value to take.
My car was broken into the a week ago. I get into my car at 5:45 in the morning on my way to work. First thing I noticed was my glove compartment had been emptied onto my passenger seat. Then my eyes shifted towards my CD player. AWWWWW FUCK. Gone. I was so pissed, driving to work in silence. They also took a bottle of cologne I had in my glove compartment, my work keys, and a fake $200 bill i had. They left my CD’s, strangely enough.
World Eater- I hid on my roof last weekend with a bat. Our roof is pretty high and it let’s us see alot of our surrounding area. I was hoping to see somebody suspicious peeking through car windows or something. But saw nothing.
My roommate also had his CD player stolen a few months ago. So it’s probably somebody in the area.
It fucking sucks. There’s nothing I can do. I didn’t even call cops.
-Shaggarito
That was your car?! :eek: Those pencils rocked BTW! 
So today I have my appointment with the insurance adjustor guy. After looking over my car and my policy, he informs me that when all is said and done, they will fix my car and hand me a check for $215!!! I don’t even have to pay my $50 deductible, because it’s already taken out of the stereo allowance!!! I am soooooo laughing my ass off right now.
Before: I had broken stereo and thief had nothing.
After: I get $215 and the thief gets my broken stereo.
HA!
Thanks jackass!!!