You have failed to follow the simple rules of societal living and therefore your rights to be in public must be terminated. However, since I understand the rules of societal living, I cannot terminate your rights (damn these rules).
First, some background. We (me, Fin_wife, and Fin_baby) were flying on Southwest Airlines. As you may know, Southwest has an open-seating policy - if the seat isn’t occupied, you can sit there. The plane was going from Airport A, stopping at Airport B, and then going on to Airport C (real names are not important). Asshat was in the window seat and there was another passenger in the aisle seat - the middle seat was empty.
Violation 1:
You pre-boarded. Pre-boarding is for those who need some extra time to board or assistance (i.e. old/infermed/injured/etc.) or those traveling with small children (us). You did not have a limp, you did not need assistance, and you did not have a small child with you (and I hope that never changes). But you still pre-boarded. I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you had some valid reason for pre-boarding but still – violation level :minimal
Violation 2:
You were saving the seat in the middle for a friend. There is nothing wrong with that but when another passenger came up and asked if the seat was free, you were on the phone. The passenger in the aisle seat said “I think she is saving it for a friend” but the other papssenger wanted confirmation. He asked you if you were saving it and you, in a very rude manner, mouthed yes. After you got off the phone, you gave the other women crap. “Didn’t you see I was on the phone. I was trying to leave a message and I couldn’t talk.” Well, fuck you bitch. She didn’t owe you anything. She was trying to be nice. – violation level: moderate.
Violation 3:
While trying to save the seat, you were also trying to save the overhead bin space. Big no-no. Just because the bin is over your head doesn’t mean it is yours. The plane was filling up and space was limited. When the flight attendent came over, you tried to explain how you were going to put your purse up there right before the flight. He said “I’m sorry ma’am, the overhead bins are for larger items. Please keep that under the seat in front of you.” Then you tried to give him something else. Again, he told you to keep it below and gave the space to a man with a larger bag (score one for Southwest) – violation level: moderate.
Violation 4:
When the plane was full and the flight attendent gave your “saved” seat to somebody else, I actually felt bad for you. You were stood up (well, given your personality, I can understand). When the passenger sat down, you asked if he was getting off at airport B or C. He said airport B. You said “Good, my friend is coming aboard at airport B and we’re going to airport C.” Wait just a fucking minute. You were planning on saving this seat during an entire flight when your companion wasn’t even going to be on the flight? And you wanted to save the overhead bin space even though a majority of the people were getting off at airport B, hence freeing up the bins? You, lady, are stupid. You should not ever exit your house without aides. You cannot live within the societal rules we must follow. This prevents others from bitch-slapping you throughout the whole flight. – violation level: extreme.
I hope I never have the misfortune of being on a flight with you again. But if I do, I will be sure to ask you what type of diet are you on where you drink cans of chicken broth during the flight (yes, cans of College Inn broth.)
